Man flu! - Printable Version

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+--- Thread: Man flu! (/showthread.php?tid=26143)

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Man flu! - Huggy - 22-04-2016

1. Man-Flu is more painful than childbirth.

This is an irrefutable scientific fact*.
*(Based on a survey of over 100,000 men.)

2. Man-Flu is not ‘just a cold’. It is a condition so severe that the germs from a single Man-Flu sneeze could wipe out entire tribes of people living in the rainforest. And probably loads of monkeys too.

3. Women do not contract Man-Flu. At worst they suffer from what is medically recognised as a ‘Mild Girly Sniffle’ – which, if a man caught, he would still be able to run, throw a ball, tear the phone book in half and compete in all other kinds of manly activities.

4. Men do not ‘moan’ when they have Man-Flu. They emit involuntary groans of agony that are entirely in proportion to the unbearable pain they are in.

5. Full recovery from Man-Flu will take place much quicker if their simple requests for care, sympathy and regular cups of tea are met. Is that really so much to ask? Florence Nightingale would have done it.

6. More men die each year from M.F.N. (Man-Flu Neglect) than lots and lots of other things. (Like rabbit attacks or choking on toast).

7. Men suffering from Man-Flu want nothing more than to get out of bed and go to work, but they are too selfless to risk spreading this awful condition amongst their friends and colleagues. In this sense, they are the greatest heroes this country has ever known.

8. In 1982 scientists managed to simulate the agonising symptoms of full blown Man-Flu in a female chimp. She became so ill that her head fell off. (It’s true!)

9. Man-Flu germs are more powerful than He-Man, The Thundercats and The A-Team combined. They are too strong for weak, nasty tasting ‘lady medicines’ like Lemsip, so don’t bother trying to force them on a victim of Man-Flu.

10. Every minute in this country one man is struck down by Man-Flu.

Women, all we ask is that each of you offers them a cup of tea, some kind words and your undivided attention and care. Then maybe, just maybe, we’ll beat this monstrous disease together.

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RE: Man flu! - julieTG - 22-04-2016

LOL

very good

Julie

spread the word,

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RE: Man flu! - tanysquirrel - 22-04-2016

9. Man-Flu germs are more powerful than He-Man, The Thundercats and The A-Team combined. They are too strong for weak, nasty tasting ‘lady medicines’ like Lemsip, so don’t bother trying to force them on a victim of Man-Flu.

ah but only the CARE Bears can defeat the Man-flu , with their care-bear-stare....

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RE: Man flu! - polymorphis - 22-04-2016

What a terrible disease! Thanks goddess I am getting immune ...

... or not?

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RE: Man flu! - ScarletBloom - 23-04-2016

lol

Nothing is stronger than the A-Team!


Not sure if I've ever caught man flu...

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RE: Man flu! - ellacraig - 23-04-2016

had a god chuckle. Thanks

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RE: Man flu! - Huggy - 23-04-2016

Oh no! Not the Care Bare Stare! Too many rainbows!!!

Hey, now here's a thought?

Does NBE provide immunity to Man Flu?

The implications are huge! ;-)

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RE: Man flu! - tanysquirrel - 23-04-2016

(23-04-2016, 09:47 AM)Huggy Wrote:  Oh no! Not the Care Bare Stare! Too many rainbows!!!

Hey, now here's a thought?

Does NBE provide immunity to Man Flu?

The implications are huge! ;-)

we will have to perform scientific studies. (* puts on lab coat and dons black rimmed glasses and grabs clip board*)

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RE: Man flu! - tanysquirrel - 23-04-2016

ugh.. darnit.. silly comp is acting up, stay tuned

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RE: Man flu! - tanysquirrel - 23-04-2016

gotta love gene wilder

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