(25-11-2011, 11:06 PM)chrissie Wrote: I remain amazed by those, who think you can gain boobs, without any other consquences,
Growing boobs, naturaly, means oestrogen; passage, top, bottom east and west of the story.
Downside; I am referred for breast screening.
Oestrogen = loss of male fuction; passage.
Want boobs without; get a boob job; whoops, wrong forum!
Please, please get real and forget the fantasies. I have fought and struggled, avoided and denied being transsexual, for some 55 years. I never knew happiness, true fullfilement. or camaraderie, until I was in my 60's. I do not now need to read pathetic drivelling, from fantasists. I will give my all to the TS girls out there; they do not worry about "Male Function"
Look on BBC I-player/ frozen planet, to get an insight into the sheer utter and total worthlesness of "Male Function"; remember, lesbians have fun!
Chrissie,
I cannot believe that it is as simple as that.
I presume it is aimed at one or two of the new recruits, but I have some sympathy for them.
I'm not setting out to be deliberately argumentative, I appreciate all the kindnesses you have shown, but I do feel strongly about the position of the poor wife.
I have no issue with what you say for unattached people, but to say that "TS girls do not worry about male function" is treating it rather black and white, when in actuality there are shades of grey. I've heard your radio broadcast where you talk about how this is a perinatal condition. You know that being a transexual is caused by being exposed to inappropriate hormone levels at a delicate stage, usually due to maternal stress. This means that it is a disorder to be managed, usually by transition nowadays, but it doesn't mean embracing transition like a religion does it?
It's a bit like "you either embrace the concept of being TS = no penis, or damn your soul to hell, go away and suffer"
The only TS who do not care about male function, to my mind, must be:
a) Homosexual in the first instance, wanting to be made love to by a man, or
b) someone like yourself who has unfortunately become widowed
c) someone whose wife is
genuinely bisexual (how many of them are?)
d) someone whose wife loves them so much they let them persuade them that being a lesbian is "ok", but _may_ be desperately disappointed and secretly grieves for the lover that she once joined as one body for the sake of love, not sex. (More likely, in my opinion)
It's a lot to expect a wife who has had a near-normal physical relationship to become a lesbian.
For instance:
Imagine being a normal male whose wife awakens to being a TS FTM but retains "homosexual" love for you, her husband, develops a phallus and wants to penetrate you anally. Whereas a loving husband might wish to accomodate her desire to become a man, you might not want to become a homosexual "bottom", however much "fun" this could turn out to be. Possibly by being a
very loving husband you could pretend to enjoy what amounted to anal rape, I don't know.
For those transsexuals who awaken late, like me, have a wife who loves them, and kids, full transition may not be practical or desirable. What choices lay open to them?
I don't disagree that Lesbians can have fun, but it is equally true that heterosexual lovemaking is the most profound experience for two people who love each other, particularly if they have had children together. I know that my wife finds the idea of a dildo repulsive; perhaps if I browbeat her into letting me transition she would lie there and pretend that my strapon was a penis and fake an orgasm for me, meanwhile cringing inside, who knows?
To lose that ability, to me, would amount to a kind of bereavement. It would be as though the wife's husband had died, and that she had found a lesbian partner. However desirable that may be for the MTF, one has to be certain that the wife's happiness is not sacrificed for that of the husband, if it is possible to be almost as happy by retaining male function.
There's another issue. I hear a lot about brain reprogramming, and I believe it. However, I consider possessing a penis a reality check. If I had a fully-functioning, orgasmic vagina, I'm pretty sure that I would start wanting to try it out. This may well be with lesbian utilities, but sooner or later, with pretty much no testosterone, and a lot of estrogen, I reckon I'd probably start obsessing about feeling a real penis inside.
Next thing you know, affairs then divorce. I wouldn't want to be put in that situation. It would be exchanging one obsession incompatible with married life for another.
You know that transition can cause divorce - you have friends that were married with kids for decades who are now married to each other... what a risk to take for someone who is happily married!
Also, don't forget that whereas what you say above may be true that Oestrogen = loss of male function, PM is an oestrogen mimic, and so far the effects on the libido appear to be reversible.
In my case, discovering PM has made me realise what I am; I have a transsexual brain. I can make rational decisions. Without it, I am compelled to do things that I find disturbing. I had an uncontrollable urge to feminise my body, which is how I wound up here, and, thank God, discovered PM.
The medical orthodoxy can do nothing for me, because I am a heretic. I wish to manage what I, and most of the medical establishment, consider a brain disorder.
The medical orthodoxy labels it with the magic PC words "alternative lifestyle" and starts the process of injecting potentially dangerous hormones while preparing for massive internal re-engineering surgery.
(I suppose, by being a heretic, some will accuse me of not being a transsexual, because I am not following "the rules". Maybe I'm not; if you want to give me a label for someone who is not TS but with a TS brain, I'll consider it.)
Now, I am in the ironic situation that I no longer need to feminise my body as long as I am taking the very thing that will do it for me.
This may well happen to the newcomers who are giving you so much personal grief.
For me growing breasts is no longer a fantasy, though I must confess, on a personal basis I'd be quite happy about it if it wasn't going to cause awkward problems later on.
It is the degree of "selfishness" that I allow myself because, mentally, and temperamentally, I am now a better person, and hence a better husband.
I think, and hope, that because PM is an Oestrogen mimic rather than the stuff that the NHS would pump me with, I can keep my mind balanced, and with judicious juggling of dosages, keep my male function when needed. On 3g per day, it not "standard male", but something that I think is better. I can no longer achieve erection by mental fantasising; I need some kind of physical stimulation, but when applied, particularly to these now inconvenient breasts, it is achieved effectively. I say "better", because I no longer obsess about feminisation in my head, as it no longer sufficient to stimulate me.
That's my plan, anyway.
It may not be possible - I dont know yet, but there is a lot that is only vaguely known about PM. But we should remember that it is a vegetable in Northern Thailand which has been eaten by all and sundry, female and male, for a long time. Generally plants with harmful effects aren't taken up as a "food supplement". If PM meant the permanent effect of loss of male function, I'm sure there would be warnings printed on the label.
If I'm wrong, I will return shamefaced and admit it, but I have to make the effort for my wife's sake. She didn't ask for all this, and I have to make every effort for her happiness. She doesn't want to turn into a lesbian and I don't want her to. I don't want to divorce her either as she is one of only 3 people in the world that I live for, the other two being my kids. Equally, I don't want to subject her to emotional blackmail so that she gives in and agrees to something that will ultimately make her unhappy.
She understands that physical problems are less important than mental problems, sees the good things that PM has done for my mind and accepts that breasts come as part of the package. She is very anxious about it, but is coming to terms with it. I can't ask for more than that.
It's called sacrifice. You do it for the people you love.
