[EvaMarie]

watching the poor guy do it all while trying not to interfere because you know despite how girly you are now the things he's doing were once things you were once and still are expert at???

AND there's also the whole learning the ways of women as far as testing a man to see just what you can get away with, being a bitch ect... For me there's an irresistible urge to see if he will put you in your place when you want him to or just annoyingly kiss your ass....

LOL, I never was or am an expert at anything masculine....and I have always treated whoever I was seeing like that. Testing them to see what I can get away with. It didn't go over so well with most women!

Other than being outmatched physically, it may not be as different for me as it would for some, although inherently super weird at first. Fuck guys though, I'm not interested unless I have SRS and even then, my interest would only be in one particular body part lol.

Of course, I do tend to get attached pretty easily, so that could change.

Well I always was and still am pretty damn good with tools and fixing just about anything....

"Inherently super weird" about sums it though as far as my limited experience dating guys go's for sure

Like Clara said though those damn bits are just starting to "get in the way".... Sure would be nice not to have to constantly fight T...

I was always pretty much indifferent about mine, didnt particularly like or dislike them, just a part of me I guess.... That actually used to bother me a bit too and Id wonder if there was something "wrong" with me because my "normal" guy friends seemed to be very attached to theirs and even had stupid names for em

[Samantha Rogers]

IDK, Eva, I never got the game playing in relationships as a guy and doubt that will change as my gender does. I never found common ground with women who play games. And I always found plenty that did not with whom to relate. I doubt a switch in gender will alter that essential truth, despite playing for the other team. What I have found to change is that I am far slower to anger, far less arrogant, and far more empathetic. I listen better. These are all positives in my book. And when I run into guys who act the way in which I once behaved (egotistically arrogant, obnoxiously self opinionated etc) I find myself with a mixture of shame and revulsion. Anyone else experience that?

Hey I was never into games as a guy either thats whats so damn weird about going at this from a womans point of view

I mean it IS totally different now for me... I talk about all this with my GF's and they are like "well your being a bitch"... It is something I dont seem to have much control over either.... Might just be this particular guy Im seeing though, he is WAY more into me than Im into him... I do have little experience with men that's for sure and Im not really even sure I like men much at this point.... Just a thing I had to try that will definitely take some time to figure out

Well, I may have to reconsider all this as time passes. You have a lot more experience than me in this area, Eva...tee hee. Your comment about a guy "more into you than you are into him" made me stop and remember conversations with guys at the club where they were very interested and I was not....and in retrospect, my attempts to be nice while not expressing interest could have been misinterpreted as "games" . Going to need to watch this process and how it falls out.

[EvaMarie]

IDK, Eva, I never got the game playing in relationships as a guy and doubt that will change as my gender does. I never found common ground with women who play games. And I always found plenty that did not with whom to relate. I doubt a switch in gender will alter that essential truth, despite playing for the other team. What I have found to change is that I am far slower to anger, far less arrogant, and far more empathetic. I listen better. These are all positives in my book. And when I run into guys who act the way in which I once behaved (egotistically arrogant, obnoxiously self opinionated etc) I find myself with a mixture of shame and revulsion. Anyone else experience that?

I haven't experienced it personally, yet, but I do see a lot of what I now judge to be boorish behavior that is not very flattering. I do find myself viewing men from the other side more these days. It's very strange to find myself in that position, you know? Taking a woman's perspective? I can't help feeling a bit sorry for men, though. They may have certain privileges that women don't, but there's a lot that they are excluded from through self-imposed constraints as well as those demanded by society. Men have a very narrow path within which they are expected to walk. What's so strange is that men are the most ardent enforcers of those constraints.

Clara

Yes a key moment for me was when I found myself looking at men in a totally different way than I ever had.... Some are just plain disgusting slobs, the way they dress act and SMELL... That NEVER really used to bother me either, now it does....

I remember being out shopping shortly after coming out to familly.... I was looking at the good looking guys with their beautiful GF's... I was feeling a bit self conscious like usual about being a "guy dressed as a woman"... But as I looked at the men with their muscles and beards and all around manliness I had a HUGE moment... It clicked in my head... YOU'RE NO LONGER ONE OF THEM, your a woman and your even kinda pretty so stop these silly thoughts that your "still a guy" and go with the flow girl That right there just put me totally at ease with being femme to this day

[Samantha Rogers]

OK, so after that last little brouhaha, and in a fit of hasty pique, I rashly removed all my previous pics. So get ready because here comes a history of Sammie...lol
Here is what my chest looked like right before I started on PM nearly four years ago, together with what it looked like right before beginning synthetic HRT in February.

   

   

more to come...tee hee

[Samantha Rogers]

Here is one from today...
   

[Samantha Rogers]

For the majority of the three plus years prior to syn HRT, the program was primarily high volumes of PM (between 2000mgs and 4500mgs daily) with a small amount of SP (500-600 mgs daily) plus occasional experimentation with Maca.
In February when my blood work was done, my Testosterone measured at less than 1 free T and less than 3 total. Yes, you read that correctly. It remains in that range now despite having removed all AAs from my program.
Since early February I have used between 3mgs and 6mgs of E administered daily and orally under the tongue to dissolve. In addition O have supplemented with some 1000-1500mgs of PM and recently added Maca plus oral Progesterone.

Prior to January of this year, I had never dressed publicly and never in front of anyone, nor had I ever had a picture taken despite having dressed privately for some twenty years.
In late January I had a makeover done at a studio locally. Here is a pic from that session (I hated the wig, but I like the shot overall)

   

[Samantha Rogers]

Two more from the same session...
       

[Samantha Rogers]

These three are from my very first public outing ever...boy was I nervous. We changed before leaving the meeting to go out dancing.
This was the night I first learned how very much I loved to dance.

           

[AnnieBL]

And one more.... Just a note...as I mentioned to Clara in a pm this morning, I am trying to eliminate whatever artificial things I have been using in my presentation. This last weekend I eliminated padding in the hips and used not forms, so what you see is real (Ok I admit to a push up bra, but there was very little to it...just a plain Target one). I have not cut my hair in over a year now so I hope to soon be able to drop the wig as well. I am tired of anything artificial and long to be able to look naturally as I feel inside. Sigh...day by day...
Oddly, after saying for all this time I would always remain in "the middle", I find this thought changing. I am beginning to dream long and hard about something I never expected... a vagina. (Blushing a little now...)

Dear Friend Sammie, just as I reckoned that we (A & J) are taking a giant step towards trying to catch up just a little with your shining light, you go and raise the bar. I'll never be able to do without a wig, although I recognize that we're going to have to invest at some point in something a great deal more expensive. As for padding, I was proposing to try both with and without a small amount. You have all along showed your need to strive after perfection, which I can admire and appreciate and enjoy, but most of us have to settle for something less for ourselves. In any case,good fortune in your project and lots of hugs and goodwill.. Don't take too much notice of me today; I'm a little light headed.

[Lotus]

For the majority of the three plus years prior to syn HRT, the program was primarily high volumes of PM (between 2000mgs and 4500mgs daily) with a small amount of SP (500-600 mgs daily) plus occasional experimentation with Maca.
In February when my blood work was done, my Testosterone measured at less than 1 free T and less than 3 total. Yes, you read that correctly. It remains in that range now despite having removed all AAs from my program.
Since early February I have used between 3mgs and 6mgs of E administered daily and orally under the tongue to dissolve. In addition O have supplemented with some 1000-1500mgs of PM and recently added Maca plus oral Progesterone.

Prior to January of this year, I had never dressed publicly and never in front of anyone, nor had I ever had a picture taken despite having dressed privately for some twenty years.
In late January I had a makeover done at a studio locally. Here is a pic from that session (I hated the wig, but I like the shot overall)

Sammie,

A almost negative value of T, who knew that was possible?. I think your shape has definitely progressed, it's so much more fuller than February's photo. Along with your overall feminization (which I can't say it enough) is that you make it look so easy. its pretty scary to think what you can accomplish in the future only have been dressing/pics/outings in public since January!.

It's really inspiring to many to have all that going for ya and be an awesome person too!.

Hugs!