14-07-2016, 09:14 PM
I've only been taking PM for one month, after 2 months of NBE, and I have already reached that "WTF am I doing?" moment.
That month of PM has been scattered on/off across 2 and a half months because of holidays, the need to keep my plumbing working etc... I also thought that doing 2 weeks in and one/one and a half week off would have given me time to consider the effects of the growth and, essentially, stop at any time. The last pill (500mg) I took was last Monday after a week on 1000mg. For the last 3 days I've been off.
More or less every day i look into the mirror to see if there is any chaneg and, while the mirror says that there is no major cosmeetic difference, I can definitely feel that my chest is heavier and bouncier. My left side, that has always been a bit more developed than the right, is now way more developed. This morning I caught a glimpse of myself from the side while looking down ("relaxed muscle" position) and while the left side is normal-fat the right side is definitely more rounded or fuller. But I'll leave these observations for the picture thread when I'll have the time to update it.
So, I can't say I have breasts but I definitely have a serious case of "relaxed chest muscles" that wasn't there 4 months ago and that shapes my t-shirts in a different way. You can easilly mistake the shape for muscles but whoever knows me knows that I am almost a couch potato so... I don't know if they are asking themselves where that stuff is coming from (probably not).
The weight on my chest has been there for the last couple of weeks. It really bounces when I go down the stairs and if on one side it makes me happy, on the other side it makes me wonder if I did something stupid, if there is a way back in case I want out and, most of all, if it is going to stop growing as soon as I stop PM. I heard stories that PM keeps working for a while after stopping.
I started taking NBE herbs out of curiousity. Maybe because I am a bit gender disphoric but not enough to transition and I wanted to put myself in some weird "mental bondage" situation. Many people say that PM is addictive; I don't think it is. It's the feeling of doing something to change one's body that is addictive.
Anyway, my plan is to stop for a while and see if anything happens, going up or going down. If on one side I am scared of what I have done, on the other side I am thrilled for being a bit out of control. My wife has no idea of what I am doing and her mom is coming to stay with us for a few months from September so anything feminine must be hidden both in terms of clothing, habits and, mostly, body parts.
I feel like I am in a TG fiction story. One of those where the main character is "caught with consequences" of screws up and has to live with the consequences. At this point two things are for sure:
1) I am weirder than I thought
2) Alcohol definitely helps when writing down something like this.
That month of PM has been scattered on/off across 2 and a half months because of holidays, the need to keep my plumbing working etc... I also thought that doing 2 weeks in and one/one and a half week off would have given me time to consider the effects of the growth and, essentially, stop at any time. The last pill (500mg) I took was last Monday after a week on 1000mg. For the last 3 days I've been off.
More or less every day i look into the mirror to see if there is any chaneg and, while the mirror says that there is no major cosmeetic difference, I can definitely feel that my chest is heavier and bouncier. My left side, that has always been a bit more developed than the right, is now way more developed. This morning I caught a glimpse of myself from the side while looking down ("relaxed muscle" position) and while the left side is normal-fat the right side is definitely more rounded or fuller. But I'll leave these observations for the picture thread when I'll have the time to update it.
So, I can't say I have breasts but I definitely have a serious case of "relaxed chest muscles" that wasn't there 4 months ago and that shapes my t-shirts in a different way. You can easilly mistake the shape for muscles but whoever knows me knows that I am almost a couch potato so... I don't know if they are asking themselves where that stuff is coming from (probably not).
The weight on my chest has been there for the last couple of weeks. It really bounces when I go down the stairs and if on one side it makes me happy, on the other side it makes me wonder if I did something stupid, if there is a way back in case I want out and, most of all, if it is going to stop growing as soon as I stop PM. I heard stories that PM keeps working for a while after stopping.
I started taking NBE herbs out of curiousity. Maybe because I am a bit gender disphoric but not enough to transition and I wanted to put myself in some weird "mental bondage" situation. Many people say that PM is addictive; I don't think it is. It's the feeling of doing something to change one's body that is addictive.
Anyway, my plan is to stop for a while and see if anything happens, going up or going down. If on one side I am scared of what I have done, on the other side I am thrilled for being a bit out of control. My wife has no idea of what I am doing and her mom is coming to stay with us for a few months from September so anything feminine must be hidden both in terms of clothing, habits and, mostly, body parts.
I feel like I am in a TG fiction story. One of those where the main character is "caught with consequences" of screws up and has to live with the consequences. At this point two things are for sure:
1) I am weirder than I thought
2) Alcohol definitely helps when writing down something like this.
