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Will it end
#31
I would say to WAC and others on this subject that the decision to start growing breasts is in it's self an answer and only the beginning of the journey.  As the feeling and observation of watching my breasts actually spring to life and that sensitivity starts to increase, it does become addictive.  I described in my earlier post that once I noticed the growth to my breast and could see my nipples beneath my shirt, a flash of reality hit me and I stopped all meds.  I was shocked at the changes and worried where I was headed.  But after nearly 6 full months off the meds, I still had to look at myself in the mirror every day and decide where I was going to go.  I started to take HRT again.  This time I got very sensitive nipples, more growth in my areoles and additional fullness in my breasts.  I would say other than somewhat smaller areoles than a natural woman's, my nipples and breasts appear pretty natural.  I am at a point where I am comfortable.  My wife is OK with my changes, in fact she now focuses on nipple play to get me off.  I am at this point where I want to be.  I got a lot of information from this group on what to expect and how to get there.  I will continue to follow the group.  And who knows,  I may start growing again.
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#32
I am picking up this thread again because it became relevant to me.
About one month ago I promised myself to stop. I was reunited with my family and I should definitely end any sort of physical feminization. I finished the PM I had, gave away the extra ones I wouldn't use before the reunion and then stopped for good. At least I thought so. (Not much growth, see my thread, but some nice feepings).

Today I went online and bought a pack of Oxford Vitality PM. The dosage is 250mg but with a 10:1 concentration. I will take 1 per day just because my brain loves the idea. I have no other way to explain to myself why I keep going back to this.
Even if one pill should be the equivalent of 2500mg from Ainterol, I don't expect anything to actually happen physically.

So, yeah, will it ever end?

How is it going for you WAC?
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#33
When I first started, I was about three weeks into it & the PM kicked in, I kinda freaked out at the mind-changes that PM/E brought about. I really could not handle it & I threw all my PM away. It seems to be a common reaction that many have experienced. Then, a few months later i reordered. I almost had a similar episode last year with frustrations at the loss of libido. I came close to throwing away the PM. But, I didn't. I just stopped taking them for a few months. It got to the point I could recognize the signs of too much E, and I'm just going from there. "Breaks" are good, right? I don't see myself stopping for a while. I'm happy with the size I'm at now, and of course I want to go bigger, but I'm not sure how things will be when they're "really noticeable". Who knows, but I want to at least get to that point. While I do love my shaved legs & house skirts, I'm committed to male-mode in public. I hope everyone finds their peaceful path.
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#34
Causes me to wonder how much is in the placebo effect. By willingly taking something that is an estrogen, one is crossing a certain line. At least, for me, I've crossed it. I tried going on pharma HRT through a local written consent endo, though the wait time is astronomical, and it might be faster to go the traditional therapy route, so I'm on PM until then. I really dislike the whole therapy thing, and am still avoiding it, though honestly it needs to happen so I can move forward.

About two decades ago, I read about alcohol being an aromatase. I actually became an everyday drinker because of that. The broke college student at the time couldn't ever envision being able to transition the proper way, much less ever afford the SRS I wanted then and still want. Alcohol can be cheap, and also it's other effects can dull some of the dysphoria. That alcohol is an aromatase is correct, though there's a whole lot of everyday drunks that are masculine men...
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#35
Hi Paula
The thing is that I am happy with being a man. I am happy with being the man in the family, to do heavy manual labour when needed, and I enjoy the low level of personal care needed in dressing as a man in everyday life. Transitioning is really something I don't want.
I too believe that taking herbs, not just PM, has some sort of psychological placebo effect. Something like "I am doing something towards my true me or my fetish", but this has very little to do with wanting to transition. I can compare it to when I moved out of my parents' home and, free to CD as much as I wanted, I bought 50 pairs of heels, one every 3 days, just because I could. It felt like liberation and I couldn't stop myself at first.
I can rationalise as much as I want but I am still asking myself if it'll ever end.
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#36
(28-03-2017, 07:34 AM)Shirazmn Wrote: Hi Paula
The thing is that I am happy with being a man. I am happy with being the man in the family, to do heavy manual labour when needed, and I enjoy the low level of personal care needed in dressing as a man in everyday life. Transitioning is really something I don't want.
I too believe that taking herbs, not just PM, has some sort of psychological placebo effect. Something like "I am doing something towards my true me or my fetish", but this has very little to do with wanting to transition. I can compare it to when I moved out of my parents' home and, free to CD as much as I wanted, I bought 50 pairs of heels, one every 3 days, just because I could. It felt like liberation and I couldn't stop myself at first.
I can rationalise as much as I want but I am still asking myself if it'll ever end.


I went those 20 years or so thinking I didn't want to transition also, but still thinking about it quite a lot. I don't think there's really a way to get these types of thoughts out of one's head. It seems at times like the whole world says it's wrong, but the idea of me being a girl just feels so right.

That doesn't mean you have to transition socially. I plan on it eventually, though I am going very slowly. Although people might notice the changes to your chest, if you continue to dress like a guy, and don't do facial and body hair removal, people are just going to read you as a guy. People still read me as a guy even though I have started hair removal, and wear mostly women's clothes and makeup.
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#37
Well once again the "need" to start HRT became a constant thought and I ordered more pharma on the internet.  This time 2mg Proganova.  Started the 60 days regiment last Saturday and this morning my nipples were on fire.  My plan is for 30 days on and then a short break and the next 30 day regiment.  As for now, I do not see much growth in my breasts, but my nipples REALLY like estradiol. They feel so much thicker and the budding is now deep into the breast tissue. The good part is Mr. Happy is still alive and well!
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#38
Hi cat

I am on low dose hrt with breaks

The breaks certainly keep mr happy alive and well in fact he gets too excited too often 

But I want too keep him healthy and strong so that's good

Keep,us posted 

X

Julie
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