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Update on local TG support

#1

So recently I did another search for local transgender support groups.  Things were looking rather bleak as the same information was popping up.  Then I noticed that the old center had closed and they relocated, but it was still the same information with the busted phone number that didn't work.  I decided to give it another try, and sadly nothing.  A couple of weeks later I was searching again, and now there was a new website listed on social media.  So of course I quickly checked it out, and it was for the new center, and there was a BRAND NEW phone number!!!!  I was super excited, but it was short lived.  If someone were to answer, it would mean that I would be one step closer to coming out to my wife.  Besides, the information still looked like it was geared towards youths and family.  

Every few days I kept checking the site out, and debated whether to call or not, and I always chickened out.  One of the days I noticed something I hadn't noticed before, they had two sections posted, Family TG Support, and TG Support.  Could it be???  Could they possibly have a separate support group???  I let it slide a few days, but my curiosity got the better of me.  I called, it rang, and nothing, I tried calling with my actual mobile phone, and same response.  sighs  Seems like it was the same thing, but at least now it rang and I was prompted with a voicemail where as before the old number was an error.

Uhhh, I was so frustrated, I finally had the courage to call, and nothing.  Perhaps this just wasn't meant to be.  On their site, they had a contact us via eMail, so I decided to give that a go.  I sent them the following email:

Quote:Hello,

I have been looking for Transgender Support information in My City for a while now.  Previously the support group seemed Youth oriented and I was never able to reach anyone through the phone for confirmation.  I tried calling the new number listed on this website, but unfortunately no one answered.

I noticed on the webpage there are two support listings, Transgender, and Transgender Family.  Is there a difference between the two?  Is there a specific age group?  I ask because I am 39 years old and would feel very out of place if it was all youth oriented.

Any information you can provide would be greatly appreciated.  I can be reached during the day at ###-###-####

Sincerely,

Sofia

I sent that Thursday evening, and all Friday I kept checking but no emails.  I wasn't feeling well, so I went to bed early last night.  Today, I totally forgot about it, and hadn't checked my email till the afternoon.  When I checked I was surprised that I had a response, and they had responded the evening before!!!  Oh my gosh I was so excited!!!  I could hardly contain myself to open up that email.  Here was their response:

Quote:Hi. Thanks for contacting us. This is Name of Person, the President of the Boardof Directors.  I co-facilitate the family transgender group. The purprose of that group is to offer support to family members of transfolk...so the parents guardians, siblings etc.  

We are in the process of organizing a group for mature trans folk (over 30). It will probably be twice a month. Another Person will initiate as the facilitator.  Starting date hasnot been set. Most likely day for meeting will be sat or sunday afternoon.

I will let you know,when the first mtg is scheduled.

I couldn't believe what I had just read!!!  I was beside myself in joy, and happiness!  I was completely ecstatic, words cannot fully express the whirlwind of emotions I was going through.  Now granted nothing was currently set, but, wheels were in motion.  That also meant that I should probably get my wheels in motion as well.  I don't know, perhaps I am making a bigger deal of their being a support group than is warranted for, perhaps I shouldn't tell me wife yet, I don't know.  I think she'd understand me so much more if I told her, but I also feel like she will hate and be disgusted with me.  Just the feeling I get when I've vetted the conversations in the past.   Dodgy  Huh

I'm still excited at the prospect.  I guess time will tell how things turn out.   Huh  Huh
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#2

  • That's good (and important) news. SLB, did I miss the memo about you being on HRT?.  Blush Btw, only 3-4 people show up at my local support group (I don't attend).  Dodgy I'd rather find a person(s) similar to my own situation.... lol, I'm not holding my breath (like 1 in 10,000 ppl are TG).   Rolleyes
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#3

(22-10-2016, 08:33 PM)Sofia Lauren Bunny Wrote:  So recently I did another search for local transgender support groups.  Things were looking rather bleak as the same information was popping up.  Then I noticed that the old center had closed and they relocated, but it was still the same information with the busted phone number that didn't work.  I decided to give it another try, and sadly nothing.  A couple of weeks later I was searching again, and now there was a new website listed on social media.  So of course I quickly checked it out, and it was for the new center, and there was a BRAND NEW phone number!!!!  I was super excited, but it was short lived.  If someone were to answer, it would mean that I would be one step closer to coming out to my wife.  Besides, the information still looked like it was geared towards youths and family.  

Every few days I kept checking the site out, and debated whether to call or not, and I always chickened out.  One of the days I noticed something I hadn't noticed before, they had two sections posted, Family TG Support, and TG Support.  Could it be???  Could they possibly have a separate support group???  I let it slide a few days, but my curiosity got the better of me.  I called, it rang, and nothing, I tried calling with my actual mobile phone, and same response.  sighs  Seems like it was the same thing, but at least now it rang and I was prompted with a voicemail where as before the old number was an error.

Uhhh, I was so frustrated, I finally had the courage to call, and nothing.  Perhaps this just wasn't meant to be.  On their site, they had a contact us via eMail, so I decided to give that a go.  I sent them the following email:

Quote:Hello,

I have been looking for Transgender Support information in My City for a while now.  Previously the support group seemed Youth oriented and I was never able to reach anyone through the phone for confirmation.  I tried calling the new number listed on this website, but unfortunately no one answered.

I noticed on the webpage there are two support listings, Transgender, and Transgender Family.  Is there a difference between the two?  Is there a specific age group?  I ask because I am 39 years old and would feel very out of place if it was all youth oriented.

Any information you can provide would be greatly appreciated.  I can be reached during the day at ###-###-####

Sincerely,

Sofia

I sent that Thursday evening, and all Friday I kept checking but no emails.  I wasn't feeling well, so I went to bed early last night.  Today, I totally forgot about it, and hadn't checked my email till the afternoon.  When I checked I was surprised that I had a response, and they had responded the evening before!!!  Oh my gosh I was so excited!!!  I could hardly contain myself to open up that email.  Here was their response:

Quote:Hi. Thanks for contacting us. This is Name of Person, the President of the Boardof Directors.  I co-facilitate the family transgender group. The purprose of that group is to offer support to family members of transfolk...so the parents guardians, siblings etc.  

We are in the process of organizing a group for mature trans folk (over 30). It will probably be twice a month. Another Person will initiate as the facilitator.  Starting date hasnot been set. Most likely day for meeting will be sat or sunday afternoon.

I will let you know,when the first mtg is scheduled.

I couldn't believe what I had just read!!!  I was beside myself in joy, and happiness!  I was completely ecstatic, words cannot fully express the whirlwind of emotions I was going through.  Now granted nothing was currently set, but, wheels were in motion.  That also meant that I should probably get my wheels in motion as well.  I don't know, perhaps I am making a bigger deal of their being a support group than is warranted for, perhaps I shouldn't tell me wife yet, I don't know.  I think she'd understand me so much more if I told her, but I also feel like she will hate and be disgusted with me.  Just the feeling I get when I've vetted the conversations in the past.   Dodgy  Huh

I'm still excited at the prospect.  I guess time will tell how things turn out.   Huh  Huh

Oh crips ... Hon, sometimes I'm not sure how much your partner knows or doesn't know. I suspect we tell them enough to let them know something is going on, but not enough to freak them out.
As your already in HRT ( I would suspect your wife knows by now ? ) then a support group to meet like wise transgender people is not too much of a stretch.
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#4

Re Lotus - Yeah, it was accidentally slipped out about 3 months ago.  LOL.  Also I am sure that I made mention of it on a post here or there regarding the switch to HRT.  Regarding the support group, I am worried there wouldn't be a whole lot of attendance regarding TG support, but part of me has some hope seeing how they are starting a new section.  I too would rather find someone closer to my own situation, I guess time will tell.  I feel like I have been saying that a lot lately.   Huh  Dodgy

Re Jannet - I am sure my wife has her suspicions, but none of them have been confirmed.  Every time I try and broach the subject, things do no go very well and I end up feeling very down and or upset.  Part of my hoping to find local support is to see how I can possibly handle or deal with this situation better.  Unfortunately I keep submerging myself deeper and deeper, who knows if I have created more damage.  The other part of all this, I am still not sure where I fit in all of this.  I love how I look and feel as a female, but it's not something I feel I would want 100% of the time.  Same goes for my male appearance.  How can I properly explain something to someone when I don't even fully understand it myself.  I am sure she would think I am just being wishy washy and that this all in my head and I would need to stop this RIGHT NOW.  Trust me when I say I am 99.7% sure that is very close to how the conversation would go.
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#5

(24-10-2016, 05:03 PM)Sofia Lauren Bunny Wrote:  Re Lotus - Yeah, it was accidentally slipped out about 3 months ago.  LOL.  Also I am sure that I made mention of it on a post here or there regarding the switch to HRT.  Regarding the support group, I am worried there wouldn't be a whole lot of attendance regarding TG support, but part of me has some hope seeing how they are starting a new section.  I too would rather find someone closer to my own situation, I guess time will tell.  I feel like I have been saying that a lot lately.   Huh  Dodgy

Re Jannet - I am sure my wife has her suspicions, but none of them have been confirmed.  Every time I try and broach the subject, things do no go very well and I end up feeling very down and or upset.  Part of my hoping to find local support is to see how I can possibly handle or deal with this situation better.  Unfortunately I keep submerging myself deeper and deeper, who knows if I have created more damage.  The other part of all this, I am still not sure where I fit in all of this.  I love how I look and feel as a female, but it's not something I feel I would want 100% of the time.  Same goes for my male appearance.  How can I properly explain something to someone when I don't even fully understand it myself.  I am sure she would think I am just being wishy washy and that this all in my head and I would need to stop this RIGHT NOW.  Trust me when I say I am 99.7% sure that is very close to how the conversation would go.

Here Sofia, take a look at this.  This is somewhat how my therapist described me.

http://www.willsworld.org/twospiritq-a.html  Or Here    http://indiancountrytodaymedianetwork.co...ve-genders

She said that what she studied in college, was not so much that they were homosexual a lot of times, but that they covered the whole spectrum.  Also, they were often considered healers or War Council members.

As to the support group that I attended.  All of them were in different stages of full transition, which is not my goal.  So, other than some of the contacts they provided me with, they were not what I was looking for.
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#6

(24-10-2016, 05:03 PM)Sofia Lauren Bunny Wrote:  Re Lotus - Yeah, it was accidentally slipped out about 3 months ago.  LOL.  Also I am sure that I made mention of it on a post here or there regarding the switch to HRT.  Regarding the support group, I am worried there wouldn't be a whole lot of attendance regarding TG support, but part of me has some hope seeing how they are starting a new section.  I too would rather find someone closer to my own situation, I guess time will tell.  I feel like I have been saying that a lot lately.   Huh  Dodgy

Re Jannet - I am sure my wife has her suspicions, but none of them have been confirmed.  Every time I try and broach the subject, things do no go very well and I end up feeling very down and or upset.  Part of my hoping to find local support is to see how I can possibly handle or deal with this situation better.  Unfortunately I keep submerging myself deeper and deeper, who knows if I have created more damage.  The other part of all this, I am still not sure where I fit in all of this.  I love how I look and feel as a female, but it's not something I feel I would want 100% of the time.  Same goes for my male appearance.  How can I properly explain something to someone when I don't even fully understand it myself.  I am sure she would think I am just being wishy washy and that this all in my head and I would need to stop this RIGHT NOW.  Trust me when I say I am 99.7% sure that is very close to how the conversation would go.

It's a pity we did not live closer .. I feel we are both in the same boat.
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#7

(22-10-2016, 09:14 PM)Lotus Wrote:  
  • That's good (and important) news. SLB, did I miss the memo about you being on HRT?.  Blush Btw, only 3-4 people show up at my local support group (I don't attend).  Dodgy I'd rather find a person(s) similar to my own situation.... lol, I'm not holding my breath (like 1 in 10,000 ppl are TG).   Rolleyes

No one really knows the exact number, but it's closer to 1 in 300 than 1 in 10,000. Most estimates I usually see are from .3% to .6% of the population.

The closest local support group to me is about a 90 minute drive, so I haven't went yet.
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#8

(26-10-2016, 03:13 PM)PaulaJ Wrote:  
(22-10-2016, 09:14 PM)Lotus Wrote:  
  • That's good (and important) news. SLB, did I miss the memo about you being on HRT?.  Blush Btw, only 3-4 people show up at my local support group (I don't attend).  Dodgy I'd rather find a person(s) similar to my own situation.... lol, I'm not holding my breath (like 1 in 10,000 ppl are TG).   Rolleyes

No one really knows the exact number, but it's closer to 1 in 300 than 1 in 10,000. Most estimates I usually see are from .3% to .6% of the population.

The closest local support group to me is about a 90 minute drive, so I haven't went yet.

I just looked at some estimates of Transgendered Amongst the U.S. population on Wiki.  Some States report anywheres from 1.5% to 5% of their individual residence as being so.  So, about an average of 3.8%.  If I did the numbers right, out of 10,000 that would be around 380 peeps.  In the area I live, that would put the local population of all Transgenders about 15,000 to 16,000 at 400,000 population.

I personally think it's closer, here locally at about 1/3 that number.  That's just the ones who have officially came out of the closet.  There are many more like myself who have not changed driver's licenses , birth certificates etc.
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#9

re iaboy - Thank you the links, I've read similar and enjoyed reading these as well.  Smile  I really haven't ventured to guess how many would be here where I live.  I mean, I live in a large enough city, but it just doesn't seem very open about that.  Either that, or perhaps I am just not looking hard enough.  Ha ha ha.

re Jannet - The joys of online friends, they can be anywhere in the world.  The downfall, never seems like any are close enough to visit.  Cest la vie!  Thank you Jannet.  

re PaulaJ - It's not a number I've looked up, but I am sure depending on locations that percentage is surely to go drastically up, or drastically down.  Sorry the closest group is not exactly close for you.  Seems to be a bit of a pain that way.   Dodgy
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#10

Oh my gosh, oh my gosh OH MY GOSH!!!  The local support group just contacted me back today!  I was soooooo excited!!!  So they are supposed to meet for the first time in two weeks.  As some of you may or may not be aware, I have finally come out to my wife.  Though it did not go well, I did ask her last night if she minded if I attended.  This was of course before I even knew when they were going to meet.  She was not exactly thrilled since it would mean my NOT spending time with the family.   Sad  Looking at the time frame, it happens to coincide with the time that we would be going to Church with her family.  Ugh, not good!!!  That would just totally piss her off further if I were to "ditch" them to go.  So, hopefully she doesn't mind switching so we go this weekend with her family instead of next weekend.  Though when I tell her the reason, she may not be so inclined.  My head is spinning!!!  I am excited, I am scared, I am nervous, I am ... I am ... I am freaking out and rambling, and hyperventilating a bit.

Okay, okay, I'm better, I think, for now... yes, okay. AGH!!!!! No I am not, I am a myriad of emotions right now, oh my gosh, I think I am going to cry, I am smiling non stop, I think I've lost it!  Ha ha ha!  I am not sure I can handle anymore news, after last night, and now, I feel like a Yo-Yo, rocket to the bottom, and rocket right back to the top!!  EEEEEEEEK!!!!  I just wanted to share this with everyone, I am just super super excited at the moment.   Big Grin
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