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Grim reading, frighting or reality ?

#1

Hi all

I read this article many years ago and thought ooooh fuck

This was brought to me by a beautiful T girl on here, and I would love to know all our thoughts

Sobering or ???????

Let us know


Julie

ps

its not for the faint hearted amongst us


https://tgchatroom.com/wiki/index.php/So...apter_1%29
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#2
Wink 

Thanks Julie

Can you say reality check.

Being the realist i am, I was cognoscente of many of the points raised in the article.  But the actual cost figures were astonishing.  It just reinforces my desire to live my life as a woman using the bits and pieces god and nature have given me, as well as the knowlege of how to manipulate them with herbs and hormones.  :Smile

I do present as a woman quite often, albeit a chubby house wife as opposed to the slim sex kitten I see myself as in my dreams, or hallucinations.  But I will take what I can get.  Ever can I help you Ma'am does make me smile and gives me pause to think that people do see the inner women in me.

I saw a poster once, and wish I had bought it now, that said, cross dressing is 10% paint and 90% attitude.  The older i get the more I believe it was true.  Do I want a feminine body.  Got that right sister.  I want it as feminine as herbs and hormones will allow.  The rest is up to my attitude.

I could probably pontificate for another 1000 words, but I will spare you and thank your for your patience.

Anyway.  Let me just say, be happy with what you have, and realistic about what you can achieve.  It is not a bad thing to dream.  but a sin not to try and achieve those dreams.

Parphrasing JFK.  Some look at things and say why.  I look at things and say why not.  There is no reason I cannot present my inner women to the world and I choose to do so.  With a tolerance of a wife who does not want the world to think she is married to a lesbian.  But that is a topic for a different day

God bless you all. 

Feel free to responde here to my rant, or message me off line

Christina
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#3

Yes its sobering reading - but at the same time very much a worse case scenario...........To be honest even my sister recently commented that my hair line was getting lower, I have had significant hair re-growth where it was thinning and I have already achieved more than an A cup from less than 10 months BO and still very much growing.

I would agree with certain aspects of it though and it is useful advice in terms of the mental changes, yes am on BO and not HRT (yet.....but the package with that and the Spiro is sat about 4 foot away at present) and the mental changes have been significant but not unmanageable.  I am more emotional than I was but not to the point at blubbing at every little thing - maybe that is still to come!

I guess at the end of the day everyone needs to do what is right for them, yes you are unlikely to transform from an ugly bloke into a beautiful female but am sure most people on here are realistic in their aims - passable is good enough if you want to transition and at the end of the day you do just want to blend into the background.

I have definitely found the more mental changes I have the more I am starting to buy clothes thinking about practicality although thats possibly old age as well, so whilst some of the advice in there is useful I think a lot of it is mainly common sense, and a bit of a reality check but I would disagree with some of the statements made within...

You have to do what is right for you - if you always do what you have always done you will always get what you always got. Yes the health risks are not inconsiderable but taking note of your body and being sensible will help ensure you stay relatively safe, and they are risks not certainties. Of course it is safer to be doing this under medical supervision but it is not inherently unsafe without, and after all if we were completely risk adverse we wouldnt even get out of bed in the morning let alone do all the day to day stuff.

I always look at things this way - if you dont try you will always be left wondering what if, plus of course you could get run over by a bus tomorrow - more a metaphorical bus than a real one! But am sure you all get the meaning there!!

Not so much my 2pence worth as £2 worth but you have to plot your own course, and whilst it is a useful reality check in some aspects, you also need to do what feels right for yourself.

Megan
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#4

Excellent posts girls

Keep them coming

Julie
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#5

I finished it :\

Definitely challenging. I think there's a lot of truth in what she wrote, but at the same time I resent her vindictiveness.

She may be right. But I don't entirely fit her model of a transsexual Sister. I share a lot of traits with them for sure, but it's still a challenge for me to "woman up" in many of the ways she describes.

I think I share a lot of her feelings of exclusivity, but I'm not entirely sure that they are the right way to see things. I really want to be more open and inclusive, because I really want to be included, like really really.

I think the problem is that life isn't really like a story that has a clear moral that you can just share with others. The lessons learned from a life like the one this author has are plainly contradictory when you look at them all at the same time.

Tell people or you risk being murdered. Tell people and you are branded a "tranny" forever.

Get GRS, if you don't want it you aren't really a woman. GRS doesn't do anything, you can do it to a watermelon and it's still a watermelon.

All these things are technically true, but fail to fully describe what many of us experience. It just feels so exclusive.

Like I'm pretty sure that I was born with a female brain structure, but I was perfectly happy growing up and doing male things and not uncomfortable doing girl games either. I didn't really feel wrong in my body until puberty started.

This author might look at this piece of information and dismiss me, but many genetic girls have similar stories, such as tomboys. I loved some boy stuff, but I didn't really know what being a boy meant, I just knew that I was ok hanging out with my brother but hated being shut out by my sisters.

Every step that my body took towards masculinity was painful to me, and I didn't understand why.

What if I'm wrong though? What if I had a perfectly normal brain structure at birth? Is it still acceptable for me to see myself as a woman, and want to be accepted in society as a woman?

I feel like this person's answer would be no. It doesn't matter that I want to put in the work, it doesn't matter that thinking of myself as male is painful and wrong in a deep part of my soul.

I may never know for sure if I legitimately was "born this way" or not. But I'm not going to risk my hope and chances to have a meaningful life just because I cannot claim to know about something that happened before I can even remember.

The fact is that being a man doesn't work for me. I can't accept that that is my future. I don't accept that I am a fake woman either.

Yes, it was easy for me to get hormones. Yes, I surround myself with encouraging positive people who won't reject me. Yes, at one point this was "just a sexual thing" to me.

No, I'm not a man who will soon buy a vagina for the wrong reasons. I'm a girl who temporarily has a penis.
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#6

Quote:Taking female hormones changes what little male brain you were born with to a female brain. This means several things: 1) it is permanent, it cannot be reversed; 2) it means that you will, in fact, start thinking more like a woman. You will cry at commercials, you will ditch the porn collection, and you will stop masturbating, in many cases, altogether. And remember those stupid movies your wife likes to watch endlessly? They will now captivate you. You will carry around tissues and have a stash in every room in the house because you will cry at the drop of a hat. You will cry, swearing that you cannot cry any more, and it goes on for days on end. And afterwards, you will scream, "I have no more tears left! I cannot cry any more!" but you cry for more endless days. Hormones MAKE YOU THINK, FEEL, AND BEHAVE AS A WOMAN! And now, for the worst part...

Remember saying to yourself... no, not me? I am too strong for that? Well guess what, you are right. But what you fail to understand it that you will no longer be you. Get this through your head right now: you are not immune to the laws of physics... your brain will change. That means that the one and only weapon you have is now lost. Forever. That means that the "you" that was strong and predictable is now someone else. That means that what you used to control your world, what you are now using to make everything alright, is now permanently stuck in PMS and hot flashes. It’s gone. The one thing keeping you sane, the one thing you knew best, your brain... has changed sexes and is dragging you along with it, involuntarily.


Haha I can vouch for this. Oh and don't forget the bitchiness lol.
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#7

Oh my ..this is heavy reading ..still working my way through it.
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#8

Dear Julie,

there is a reason I didn't want to put it here... Wink  It really is a tough text. I was not able to read it in its entirety, because of strong cocktail of emotions it caused me (anxiety, disgust, sadness). Even now, few days later, I don't feel good when thinking about it.

It is true that there are many reservations about that article. First of all, what is the purpose of the text? What is its meaning? What the author tried to tell us? Is it really just a description? If so, why all the negativity? If you want to describe something, the best think you can do is to use neutral language and neutral statements. My conclusion is that the author either just discharged her frustrations or that the text is more clever than I thought and it is written to support introspection.

It works as a great projection material. I can ask myself: "Why am I feeling such emotions while reading about consequences of the transition when I repeatedly stated I am not considering it? It just supports my conviction that transition would be catastrophic for my current life, doesn't it? So why I feel anxiety when something supports this conviction?" What is the answer for these questions? The only logical solution of this riddle is that in fact I actually DO consider transition as a possibility or maybe I even want it. And for me this is really scary realisation. But it is important to admit it.

Oh well... serious tone aside. And now for something completely different. Lets play a small game, find a fish ... err ... find one completely positive statement in aforementioned article. Wink 

Poly
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#9

Beautiful Poly

you will be fishing for some time finding anything positive in that article but

I think it should be there even if it shocks one of us off the course of carrying on down a slippery path,

however it has truth in it but not as black and white to all,

if you read other forums , at times it is shockingly fast how some girls had almost no trans feelings then Bang the bell tolled and with a year or 2 into full time transition and a nuclear effect on their lives,

true if the bell tolled for them it would have happened any ie from

zero to shero,

but the one point to make is for some of us the bell will toll ?

so are we staving the bells call by modulating on nbe/synths ie by tacklingit head on as it starts to tremor or accelerating it by taking nbe/synths,

The bell call does not happen to most perhaps ??????

but when it or if calls, willpower certainly will not stop it and that is indeed quite frightening

Julie


x
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#10

and this input from Dianna on the other forum who has worked with

and supplied thousands of tg girls over 20 years I believe
comments as follows



The way it reads is were all doomed to fast track transition
I disagree with the premise.

I know it can seem this way to people "caught in the rapids" for the first time.

But from my perspective, it is simply not an absolute truth

.
"Helping you on your journey toward becoming a whole person"
http://www.myevanesce.com
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