23-11-2016, 11:50 PM
Hi all,
It has been a long time since I last visited this forum, and even longer since I last posted. I don't envision I will ever re-visit after this post, but I feel somewhat obligated to relate the conclusions I have reached on the journey.
I spent over two years on a high concentration of PM, convinced that I inwardly wanted to transform myself into a feminine mold. Those two years resulted in a multitude of serious health issues that I now ascribe to messing with the hormonal balance in my body. Those issues include adult-onset vitaligo, motor-neuron damage causing benign fasciculation syndrome, and macular degeneration. Since stopping the PM 18 months ago, and engaging an endocrinologist who prescribed both testosterone replacement therapy and an aromatase inhibitor, those issues have larger resolved themselves. I have also completely lost any desire to feminize or to even cross-dress.
In my case I believe my "desire" to feminize was nothing more than a sexual fetish brought on and enhanced by artificially manipulating the natural hormones in my body. In many ways participating in this forum led to a group-think mentality that furthered the illusion. Now, three weeks from tomorrow, I am finally putting the illusion to rest with plastic surgery to remove the full b-cup breasts I developed while using PM. Ironically my surgeon is a well-known expert in "female to male" top surgery. I can't use a traditional gynecomastia plastic surgeon since I have actual female breast tissue and not simply fatty deposits that can be lipo-suctioned. The surgery is not covered by insurance and will cost me $11K.
My purpose for coming back and posting this is not to stir up a lot of controversy -- in fact I won't even come back to read or answer any comments on this post. My purpose is just to relate my experiences in hopes of preventing some who may be in a similar situation from repeating my mistakes. Not everyone who is active here is actually transgender, and there is a real way out of the trap before destroying your relationships and costing yourself many serious health issues and possibly a lot of money to "undo" a mistake. I urge those of you with doubts to visit a doctor (and not one who will push the politically-correct solution of transition) to evaluate your hormonal balance and try the therapies available. You may be surprised to learn how easily you respond to a different hormonal balance.
Best wishes to you all,
Misty No More
It has been a long time since I last visited this forum, and even longer since I last posted. I don't envision I will ever re-visit after this post, but I feel somewhat obligated to relate the conclusions I have reached on the journey.
I spent over two years on a high concentration of PM, convinced that I inwardly wanted to transform myself into a feminine mold. Those two years resulted in a multitude of serious health issues that I now ascribe to messing with the hormonal balance in my body. Those issues include adult-onset vitaligo, motor-neuron damage causing benign fasciculation syndrome, and macular degeneration. Since stopping the PM 18 months ago, and engaging an endocrinologist who prescribed both testosterone replacement therapy and an aromatase inhibitor, those issues have larger resolved themselves. I have also completely lost any desire to feminize or to even cross-dress.
In my case I believe my "desire" to feminize was nothing more than a sexual fetish brought on and enhanced by artificially manipulating the natural hormones in my body. In many ways participating in this forum led to a group-think mentality that furthered the illusion. Now, three weeks from tomorrow, I am finally putting the illusion to rest with plastic surgery to remove the full b-cup breasts I developed while using PM. Ironically my surgeon is a well-known expert in "female to male" top surgery. I can't use a traditional gynecomastia plastic surgeon since I have actual female breast tissue and not simply fatty deposits that can be lipo-suctioned. The surgery is not covered by insurance and will cost me $11K.
My purpose for coming back and posting this is not to stir up a lot of controversy -- in fact I won't even come back to read or answer any comments on this post. My purpose is just to relate my experiences in hopes of preventing some who may be in a similar situation from repeating my mistakes. Not everyone who is active here is actually transgender, and there is a real way out of the trap before destroying your relationships and costing yourself many serious health issues and possibly a lot of money to "undo" a mistake. I urge those of you with doubts to visit a doctor (and not one who will push the politically-correct solution of transition) to evaluate your hormonal balance and try the therapies available. You may be surprised to learn how easily you respond to a different hormonal balance.
Best wishes to you all,
Misty No More