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Love?

#11

Wow! I love this thread.

Especially love Anastasia and Twister Mama's stories. It gives us single ones hope Big Grin

Boobiegirl, I think its great that you are taking things slow (on things physical) and really getting to know him as a friend. Like Twister Mama said, if he is genuine, he will stand the test of time. If he is not, he will fall by the way side.

While none of us can ever know the future, I think you are doing a good job of sifting the grain from the chaff.

Also, I totally get you not wanting to date for dating sake and trying to do things with a view to settling down. Unfortunately, a lot of the world doesn't think that way and it can sometimes feel as if you are swimming against the tide. Best of luck with everything.

P.S. Can more of the married women post their stories?
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#12

i second Nila, I'd love for other married or engaged women here to post their stories.
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#13

Hey Girl :)

I'm not yet married, but I've been with my boyfriend for years. We live together and have a daughter together and plan to get married in the near future. So, I believe I read you're 15? I was fourteen when I first met my boyfriend. People are always going to say that high school relationships never last, and young people never stay together. Most of the time all that is true, but sometimes there's that rare couple that proves it all wrong. It always made me so mad when adults would tell me high school relationships didn't last, and question why I was "wasting" my teenage years on a relationship that wouldn't last. Even at a young age, I knew that teenage relationship stereotype wasn't true for my relationship. I've always been mature for my age, mostly because I've always enjoyed being in the company of people much older than me than people my age. So, I wasn't like the other girls my age who had a new boyfriend every week. Like others mentioned on this forum, I had the "looking for husband material" mentality. But, I don't mean I was some weird girl who planned my future with every guy I liked. There was boys I liked, I just didn't see any sense in wasting too much time on a boy who I couldn't see myself being with long term. Obviously, not the way other Freshman girls were thinking of course haha. I always got a lot of crap from people in high school for being that way. It wasn't just adults who said I was wasting my life. All my friends thought that too! They just couldn't understand it.

But, I knew that my boyfriend was "the one". Cheesy as it sounds, sometimes you just know. There never was and never has been a doubt in my mind that I made the right decision :)

However, I wouldn't recommend to my daughter or little sister that they follow in my foot steps. Just because things worked out for me this way doesn't mean it will be that way for everyone. Having such a serious relationship at a young age causes you to miss out on a lot of things that other high school kids get to do, and causes you to deal with stress that other kids your age aren't dealing with. Relationships can be very stressful. I think teenagers should enjoy high school and college and get to experience lots of fun things before thinking about marriage and settling down. Ultimately, I can't make everyones decisions though.

Always do what's best for you and what's going to make you happy :)
I don't know if all that was the kind of answer you were looking for but I hope it helped.
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#14

Hi, one of my best friends started dating her husband at 15 and they´re still together after about 25 years. He was her first boyfriend ever, she hasn´t even kissed someone else. As far as I can see, she had a lot of questioning from people who told her she was too young to be so serious about a guy, that she should date different guys at her age. Her view about this was that she was in fact missing experiences others were having, but that she did this as her own personal choice, because she just didn´t want to throw everything she had with him away. So it was some kind of sacrifice for her but she thought it was worth it.

Of course, once you´re married things aren´t necesarily easier if you started when you were teenagers, that´s just a matter of luck, and I know this particular friend has had a lot of ups and downs in her marriage.

There were other girls I know who ended up marrying their high school boyfriends and they seem very happy but to be honest theirs was more of an on-off relationship while we were in school, so they did go out with other guys while they were on a break and things like that.

Anyway, if you´re happy with this guy you´re seeing now, I would just enjoy his company and not worry if he´s the one for the rest of your life. Life takes many turns and you never know what will happen, and you might also change your mind about what you want, that´s completely normal.
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#15

thanks for your advice everyone. I think I'm making the right choice with him. I couldn't imagine being with anyone else.
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