[EvaMarie]

Thank you for the well thought out and written reply Sammie I cant tell you how nice it is to get this kind of stuff off my "chest" with someone who understands me

Nothing against the TG community but after going to a couple of local TG support group meetings (yes there is a TG support group here in ultra conservative western SD) I really didnt get much out of it except for the contact info of a place that does laser for one of the girls and a TG friendly therapist and doctor refferal....

Now I cant speak for all TG girls but the ones I met there had a big time "victim mentality" that totally turns me off, I really want nothing to do with those kind of people TG or not... I know they are not all like that though and Im willing to give anyone chance, I do not judge or like being judged...

I have decided to give the NBE a while to work before going through the official channels but the desire is there to quit screwing around and just get on with it already...

I do not have it all figured out by any means but I do know that I will not live a lie any longer... I am very fortunate to be in the position Im in no doubt and I am proud of my past accomplishments, I do not hate the man I was but there is no going back to the act and hiding my true self anymore...

Coming out to family is going to have to happen because Im a terrible liar and there has been and Im sure there will continue to be a drastic change in my appearance in a short time....

My family has NO IDEA any of this is going on so Im sure they would be shocked at my appearance these days dressed as guy and its only gonna get worse (actually better in my eyes)... They are all many hours away from here...

My hope is they will be shocked at just how damn pretty I am but I know its gonna blow their minds, I just hope they dont worry too much about me...

Its gonna suck Im sure, I cant be sure how they will react but if they disown me thats their problem not mine.... I do not depend on them for ANYTHING... Still thats a big one staring right at me thats gonna have to be dealt with... I am trying very hard to make some real world supportive friends to help me through that....

I have been on the other sites you mentioned and to be honest they depress me, they mostly do not seem happy with themselves no matter what they do... I do not like being labeled, I am what I am...

My goal is to make friends with "normal" everyday women and men and be accepted as me and all that entails...

I will not go into kinky details but I will say that people in the BDSM scene are generally very open minded and welcoming to TG girls...
I am a very good maid A polyamourous "family" or "marriage" is my goal

I have no desire to spend a ton of cash on super high end clothes and make up, Im just a simple country girl who also happens to be a mechanical genius with a killer set of tools that can fix anything and an expert "markswoman" I feel GG are the best teachers for a girl like me as far as style goes... I mostly like to go casual and blend in anyway... But lately I also think men are a key piece of really setting the inner girl free....

As far as going to the big cities goes, thats really not for me anymore... I spent my whole life near Chicago and I always dreamed of moving to the country, I love it here but I also realize I may end up having to move yet again to find what I want...

Its my belief that people are the same wherever you go, some places are just more accepting than others unfortunately...