[dawn]

and now I cannot close it. I'm still not sure what prompted it, but last friday I started a 1xFG 1xSP and 1xRC 3 x day regimen..and my body is responding in earnest...

There's a part of me that wants this so badly...another part that is terrified of what I'm doing. this is day 5. my nips are stiff, aureoles growing and darkening, I feel more jiggle when I walk, more prominent shape...and the feelings are wonderful. the pink fog is bliss.

And in the back of my mind is the reality of my situation. The world knows me as a man. my family, my coworkers, my friends. My entire reality is built around this simple truth. How can I embrace the female without destroying that?

I've been in deep depression most of my adulthood. I've never dated, I'm very anti social, suffer from severe anxiety. I'm extremely overweight. I can't count the number of times in my life where the thought "I wish I was born a girl" ran through my mind...

But right now, at this moment, chest tingling and feelings of bliss and contentment flow through me.

I was going to stop last night. tension in my malehood that was disconcerting. I don't want to lose my fertility...I am not prepared to risk everything that I currently am...there must be some happy medium I can find...

I'm so conflicted! So confused! Why did I open this box?

Welcome Dwn

There are some great posts above, you just have to do what makes you feel right, and happy. Your fertility, won't go overnight, its going to take months, maybe years under NBE , you can always go and see a Dr and get yourself checked out once in a while, just to be sure. As for dating, you will eventually find that somebody special who will love you for who you are, GD and all.

Just keep in mind, your not alone, most of the girls here know exactly what your going through. We are here to help, all you have to do is ask.

Thank you Janet.