06-02-2015, 10:30 PM
Ok Fire and Ice...
I'm going to tell you a little bit about my own experience. For a long time I was a lot like you feel you are. I never fit in, never felt right, always tried to be what others saw in me etc. And I was miserable in my own skin because I felt like nothing I ever did was good enough, or acceptable enough to those around me. That no matter how hard I tried to fit in... I was always left on the outside looking in and wondering why it never worked the way I wanted it to work.
Round about my late 30's I finally had enough of it and I simply quit caring what others thought of me (for the most part). I did what I wanted to do, acted like I wanted to acted, went where I wanted to go, and ignored everyone around me with a strong indifference and general disdain. Peoples opinions of me no longer mattered. And you know what happened? People started coming up to me and wanting to hang around and talk, go do things etc. I also ended up with more women being attracted to me than I had ever had in my entire life before.
The only thing I can figure about all that is when you basically quit caring what others think, you relax. You are no longer TRYING to make an impression on people. You are confident in yourself and what YOU think and want, and others opinions mean squat to you. People somehow pick up on the relaxed confident attitude and they start coming around to see why you are so relaxed.
You would think not giving a damn about how other perceive you etc would have the opposite effect, pushing people away, but from my personal experience people are drawn to someone who no longer worries about the 'social structure' and does what they want regardless.
Society still has some major hangups. Men growing breasts etc is one of them. But the fact is... if you don't care what others think and just be you, most people around you will respond positively to that kind of vibe. Yeah you'll run into a few asshats now and then, but they are everywhere, you just have to learn to ignore them and continue enjoying being YOU for YOU and only YOU.
~Elain
I'm going to tell you a little bit about my own experience. For a long time I was a lot like you feel you are. I never fit in, never felt right, always tried to be what others saw in me etc. And I was miserable in my own skin because I felt like nothing I ever did was good enough, or acceptable enough to those around me. That no matter how hard I tried to fit in... I was always left on the outside looking in and wondering why it never worked the way I wanted it to work.
Round about my late 30's I finally had enough of it and I simply quit caring what others thought of me (for the most part). I did what I wanted to do, acted like I wanted to acted, went where I wanted to go, and ignored everyone around me with a strong indifference and general disdain. Peoples opinions of me no longer mattered. And you know what happened? People started coming up to me and wanting to hang around and talk, go do things etc. I also ended up with more women being attracted to me than I had ever had in my entire life before.
The only thing I can figure about all that is when you basically quit caring what others think, you relax. You are no longer TRYING to make an impression on people. You are confident in yourself and what YOU think and want, and others opinions mean squat to you. People somehow pick up on the relaxed confident attitude and they start coming around to see why you are so relaxed.
You would think not giving a damn about how other perceive you etc would have the opposite effect, pushing people away, but from my personal experience people are drawn to someone who no longer worries about the 'social structure' and does what they want regardless.
Society still has some major hangups. Men growing breasts etc is one of them. But the fact is... if you don't care what others think and just be you, most people around you will respond positively to that kind of vibe. Yeah you'll run into a few asshats now and then, but they are everywhere, you just have to learn to ignore them and continue enjoying being YOU for YOU and only YOU.
~Elain