22-10-2015, 12:29 AM
Julie,
I find it difficult to personally relate to what you're saying. Whether it's an old habit or a defense mechanism, my tendency is to avoid allowing a single issue or aspect of myself to be the center of my life for extended periods of time. For better or for worse, I think I don't need to obsess or devote all my energies on a single pursuit in order for it to be important to me. In other words, the default mode for me is to have a clear mindset that can freely engage or disengage in a wide variety of activities and considerations. There have been exceptions to this rule in my lifetime, but usually they are when I'm either very stressed, or I'm deeply unsatisfied with my life. In either case, I strive to remove the stressors or improve the quality of my life to regain a sense of normalcy.
In the realm of gender, I don't see it as a matter of having to choose from options A, B, or C. Instead, I see it as a journey to find a sense of equilibrium between energy inputted and fulfilling my expectations. Investing too much energy can be a major burden, just as having lofty expectations can be very disheartening when such dreams are not being achieved.
If GID is the so-called elephant in the room for you, I strongly talking to a therapist. If you can find one you have a good rapport with, therapy I think can really help. When you're deeply engrossed about a particular difficultly, it can be very challenging if not impossible to think outside of the box. When I was struggling with depression, I was stuck in the mindset I had to make dramatic changes in my life in order for my mood to improve. I was convinced I had to pull myself up by my bootstraps in order to beat this depressive episode. One thing I learned from my therapist is it would be easier for me to achieve my goals if I wasn't so hard on myself. While that may sound obvious to others, it certainly didn't cross my mind when I was trapped in a depressive mindset.
Agreed.
I find it difficult to personally relate to what you're saying. Whether it's an old habit or a defense mechanism, my tendency is to avoid allowing a single issue or aspect of myself to be the center of my life for extended periods of time. For better or for worse, I think I don't need to obsess or devote all my energies on a single pursuit in order for it to be important to me. In other words, the default mode for me is to have a clear mindset that can freely engage or disengage in a wide variety of activities and considerations. There have been exceptions to this rule in my lifetime, but usually they are when I'm either very stressed, or I'm deeply unsatisfied with my life. In either case, I strive to remove the stressors or improve the quality of my life to regain a sense of normalcy.
In the realm of gender, I don't see it as a matter of having to choose from options A, B, or C. Instead, I see it as a journey to find a sense of equilibrium between energy inputted and fulfilling my expectations. Investing too much energy can be a major burden, just as having lofty expectations can be very disheartening when such dreams are not being achieved.
If GID is the so-called elephant in the room for you, I strongly talking to a therapist. If you can find one you have a good rapport with, therapy I think can really help. When you're deeply engrossed about a particular difficultly, it can be very challenging if not impossible to think outside of the box. When I was struggling with depression, I was stuck in the mindset I had to make dramatic changes in my life in order for my mood to improve. I was convinced I had to pull myself up by my bootstraps in order to beat this depressive episode. One thing I learned from my therapist is it would be easier for me to achieve my goals if I wasn't so hard on myself. While that may sound obvious to others, it certainly didn't cross my mind when I was trapped in a depressive mindset.
(21-10-2015, 07:31 PM)Lotus Wrote: Julie,
I must admit you are a hard person to keep up with lol (e.g. 30-40 threads in three weeks),
Agreed.