17-02-2016, 02:40 PM
Just a quick follow-up:
The Fish Oil seems to have been affecting adrenals, if I had to guess. Adrenal-secreted Testosterones are up, I think.
Growing hair on my upper arms/shoulders. Yay.
But the GD is still there, just ... I don't know. Can't articulate.
I'm losing interest in almost everything. As in, can't be bothered doing the things I'm supposed to do (outside of work) - between work sucking down time and energy, and like 6 side-projects I'm trying to manage (poorly), there's no time left to be a human being, male OR female, masculine or feminine.
Point was, fish oil, even at 2400 IU / day, wasn't enough overall. And the stresses of "married" life were something I didn't want, but I've managed for over a decade now, and I didn't want it from Day 1. I thought I'd made that clear, but at this point...? Since we're barely even roommates, and she's praising me for being the kitchen bitch basically? (Weekend went to laundry, dishes, cleaning, and then replacing my dead cell phone. Also researching LED lights to replace the ones in the lab here, which are flourescents, which cause eye fatigue and cataracts.) And clean off the car, gas it up, follow up with the storage people about the "daughter's" stuff, try to check in with sick friend, check in with mom, cook food, food shopping, etc, etc, etc.
Somehow, I'm doing all the work, she's taking all the credit, and there's something wrong with ME...?
Need to change my life. Root out the cause of this depression, kick her out of my life, and move on. It can't get worse. And with her gone, I can get my head clear, and get my weight down without being told I'm abandoning her (to go to the gym), or ignoring her (because we're not talking. But how much must I pretend to care about the daily BS? I don't care what Kellen said to Jenny, or how Mary refers to you as "it" every day... You wonder why I'm almost misogynistic, I think seeing & hearing about grown women acting like they're 5 is pretty much THE catalyst. I grew up seeing woman as wonderful, loving, gentle, soft, beautiful, virtuous. And here they are aping the worst characteristics of man and child, and I still want to BE one...
)
Anyway, Fish Oil wasn't a cure, and at a day off, I'd revert anyway. And now the hair on my upper arms is back. So, Not good. Altering course. :-)
-Dianna
The Fish Oil seems to have been affecting adrenals, if I had to guess. Adrenal-secreted Testosterones are up, I think.
Growing hair on my upper arms/shoulders. Yay.
But the GD is still there, just ... I don't know. Can't articulate.
I'm losing interest in almost everything. As in, can't be bothered doing the things I'm supposed to do (outside of work) - between work sucking down time and energy, and like 6 side-projects I'm trying to manage (poorly), there's no time left to be a human being, male OR female, masculine or feminine.
Point was, fish oil, even at 2400 IU / day, wasn't enough overall. And the stresses of "married" life were something I didn't want, but I've managed for over a decade now, and I didn't want it from Day 1. I thought I'd made that clear, but at this point...? Since we're barely even roommates, and she's praising me for being the kitchen bitch basically? (Weekend went to laundry, dishes, cleaning, and then replacing my dead cell phone. Also researching LED lights to replace the ones in the lab here, which are flourescents, which cause eye fatigue and cataracts.) And clean off the car, gas it up, follow up with the storage people about the "daughter's" stuff, try to check in with sick friend, check in with mom, cook food, food shopping, etc, etc, etc.
Somehow, I'm doing all the work, she's taking all the credit, and there's something wrong with ME...?
Need to change my life. Root out the cause of this depression, kick her out of my life, and move on. It can't get worse. And with her gone, I can get my head clear, and get my weight down without being told I'm abandoning her (to go to the gym), or ignoring her (because we're not talking. But how much must I pretend to care about the daily BS? I don't care what Kellen said to Jenny, or how Mary refers to you as "it" every day... You wonder why I'm almost misogynistic, I think seeing & hearing about grown women acting like they're 5 is pretty much THE catalyst. I grew up seeing woman as wonderful, loving, gentle, soft, beautiful, virtuous. And here they are aping the worst characteristics of man and child, and I still want to BE one...
)Anyway, Fish Oil wasn't a cure, and at a day off, I'd revert anyway. And now the hair on my upper arms is back. So, Not good. Altering course. :-)
-Dianna