They are wonderfulsome, Lotus!  It sounds like your hormonal system has just about crossed the Rubicon, if I may throw a little Dante into the mix.  As you may recall, I have been on an "on-and-off" program for quite some time and the difference between our results prove the merit of staying on the path as you have.  I know that for me. stopping is always an unhappy experience for me.  I feel at sea emotionally and unfulfilled physically.  I really miss the sensations and the "hum" of estrogen infusing my body.  Thus, I think I understand what you are going through and hope you find your happy place.