[Manue]

You sound like me. Exactly like me. I'm not trying to put any labels on you, but watching porn and wishing you were the woman? Many call that gender dysphoria. Thinking about/wishing you could be a woman all the time? Gender dysphoria. Feeling like you're making a mistake and it's all wrong immediately after orgasm? That's because the dysphoria goes away for a few minutes because of the feel-good chemicals your body has released ("euphoria"). I could go on.

This might help:
https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en/am-i-trans
https://genderdysphoria.fyi/en/impostor-syndrome

Love,
Morpheus

Interesting read,

I believe the impostor syndrome applies to any individual in general. We are thought during our young life to repress dreams, ambitions and everything that makes us an individual for the sake of the collective and adulthood. So we end up in a matrix that if you make a foundational change you will be cast away by relatives who don't want their matrix disrupted either. Thus repressing who we are as persons and ending up living as frauds. The fear, IMO, is just the unacceptance that we are not living to our full potential.