Omg Lotus, this is just horrible news... I'm so sorry, I wish I knew what to say other than godspeed and best of luck, I so much wish you will get better. I'm so sorry, this kind of stuff is so unfair. I have lost friends and family to cancer before and seen the battle from close proximity, I've seen some survive, while others didn't make it. My thoughts and prayers will be with you, I wish there would be stronger words for this...