[Billie88]

I've really enjoyed reading through all this!

I'm so happy you've had a positive outcome between you and your wife!

As a guy with more than enough boob/moob to need some support (and cause I enjoy it) I've found a company called 32 Degrees. 

Their bra tanks have been a game changer for me and I wear one under my normal tee shirts or work clothes every single day.

My wife knows that I enjoy "under dressing" and totally supports me.

I have multiple of their racer back ribbed tanks (super soft, stretchy, breathable and absorbent for summer)

They now also have these active ribbed tanks that have become my favorite and my daily goto... The material is a bit thicker and really helps suck in my stomach and give a big boost in confidence.

With these tanks the neck line is a bit higher than I prefer (I don't have much of a neck lol) I actually often wear these backwards if my shirt is or polo doesn't cover it.

https://www.32degrees.com/collections/womens/products/womens-ottoman-ribbed-bra-tank

Both have removable bra pads if you want it to be more like a normal tank or put in the pads for a bit more modesty and a super soft squishy feel that goes totally unnoticed!

It looks like the racer back tanks aren't on the page but will be back closer to spring.

Something amazing that has come about from buying these tanks... Now my wife and I not only match panties daily... Now we regularly match tank tops or she will match her 32 degrees bras to my tank/panties.

You may want to buy some for you and her both!!

I can't wait to hear more of your story as things play out!!! 

I hope my suggestion helps!