[Misty0732]

I think the larger question is how do you feel about yourself. Do you wish you could make your GD disappear just like that and enjoy being and living as a male? Or do you accept and maybe even cherish your female identity as an important part of who you are, despite the unhappiness this conflict creates for you?

This is an extremely interesting question to me. When I first found this forum I believed and felt that feminization was something I desperately wanted, and I did not want that feeling to go away. I started on PM hoping for the feminization and not at all expecting the desire to diminish (and like I said, I didn't want it to diminish). The fact that it has diminished is indisputable (at least to me). Now that it has diminished I want it to stay that way (kind of like being "set free").

In no way do I want to come across as critical to others that are actively transitioning. Rather I feel that I have a much greater understanding as to the feelings those of us wrestling with GID have, and I understand that there are many degrees of transsexualism and it is important to find out where on that scale you fall. In my case, had I decided to transition I would likely regret the decision since the process of the transition itself would likely diminish the desire (in a similar way that taking PM does). Once I came "out", however, the damage to my family relationships would already be done.

I consider myself very lucky to be one of those who found significant relief using PM.

Misty