[Misty0732]

Honestly, the main thing I am looking for is a reduction in the very high level of obsessive Gender Dysphoria I have. I have read a lot of posts that refer to “rewiring,” although I am not sure that is the right term. I want to think about other things, and the need to cross-dress and all the other trappings are hard to put away a lot of the time.

Quite a few of the posters on this board (some active and some not) have seen the gender dysphoria all but disappear with PM. Some others, although far fewer, I think, have had the opposite reaction (that is, an increase in the desire to express as female). I am one of those who saw the very strong desire decrease significantly. I can honestly say I am far happier with myself than I can ever remember being, and as you put it, I "got my brain back."

If it does work, though, it posits that GD is indeed some kind of imbalance that can at least be tamed by chemistry. That would be a great doctoral thesis. I don’t know, the research papers I have read online on PM tout a laundry list of benefits, I hope the claims are real. I want my brain back.

In my case I am sure that hormones cause my dysphoria. The very interesting thing, however, is that it I need female hormones to relieve the dysphoria. That seems counter-intuitive, but it is absolutely true for me. If I try to increase my testosterone the dysphoria and anxiety literally skyrocket to the point that I seriously consider transition.

I also think you can get the mental benefits of PM with using any T-blockers. I have tried PM with and without SP and the mental benefits do not seem to change either way. Given the problems you've had with SP I would definitely consider trying PM alone if I were you.

In any case, good luck and best wishes, and keep us informed of how things work out for you!

Misty