[StayingSmall]

I have had this fetish since I was about 8. The memories of how it came about are vague but its been a constant in my life. My interest has become more intense lately. My interest is extremely specific and I'm unsure why. The women must be of average size, skinny or hefty just not a BBW. She must be somewhat cute and her breasts must be completely natural with very large almost skin toned areolas at the ends or bottom area as if pointing down, with little or no nipple protrusion. The breasts must be huge, full and hanging. I've probably looked at every large breast porn site available trying to find these breasts. I can think of 2 women who fit this description. The first is a Japanese porn star Hitomi Tanaka and the second is retro porn star Yolanda Haskins when she was not pregnant. I've seen photos of her where her areoles are dark because I believe she may be pregnant. These photos do nothing for me. There is a video of her with a skinny white guy, shes wearing a headpiece and I truly fantasize about the swaying of her breasts pretty often. It would be great if my own breasts were large but Im ok with them being what they are, 36C. My husband thinks they're great....that's what matters. I'm a white female in my early forties. I haven't the first clue how I'd react if these breasts somehow found their way into my life. I would be completely mesmerized and probably just want to watch them move naturally. I remember seeing a woman walking toward me on the street who's breasts were outrageously huge and she had on no bra. She wore an oversized mans tee shirt but I nearly lost control of myself the turn on was so intense. This is the first I've heard of other straight women having large breast fetishes and its nice to have company... I've never written anything like this and I will add that I too am mortified of this fantasy fetish. I've told boyfriends but never got too deep into it with them since I'm so particular and I think they'd be grossed out by exactly how big I like them and how specific I am. One last thing... I don't like to watch women flopping them around doing jumping jacks and all that. I just like to see them in their natural state moving on their own or in clothing sometimes.... I wish so much I could just erase this desire from my head. I really do. I can find myself consumed with it. Other times I don't think about it for months. It's all so strange and writing it out makes it even stranger for me. Thanks for taking the time to read.