[Carys]

I have thought of all of that, which is why I am proceeding with caution. Truth be told, since I have been taking PM, I haven't had nearly as many problems with my anxiety as I used to. I also feel a lot more confident, which is a very rare thing for me. If I am really not a male (despite having a male body), then the question is do I either; continue living my life as a male, allowing life to move on but being miserable and making everyone else around me miserable in the process, or pursue transitioning and completely flip my life over and start all new? I know that is a personal choice, both with very heavy outcomes, which should be considered VERY carefully and thoroughly.

On a side note, I am a pretty big asshole. I had intentionally left a tube of my breast cream in the bathroom after using it, and my wife found it. I've broken her trust too many times for her to overlook this. I know I'm at fault because I didn't just talk to her about it (which is the issue, not the breast cream itself, or desiring to be female.) I'm not exactly sure where to go from here, but I am going Rio talk it over with my therapist.