[sfem]

I think my own views on this change little over time. I have a natural curiosity about things I have not experienced in my life, but little inclination to seek most of them out for assorted reasons. One of those things is the exploration of a female identity. I have never done myself up in makeup beyond trying a bit of nail polish or lipstick a couple of times in my life. I have never completely dressed up as female, just worn specific items, usually under male clothes unless I have been alone. In fact, other than one halloween I recall rather well when I was about 5 or 6 and my mother did me up as a girl (skirt, blouse, makeup, everything), I have never even tried to present as female. I have a remarkably clear memory of that event and still remember how much I enjoyed it. Funny. Hadn't thought of that in a long time. Anyway...
I am generally non-confrontational and don't do things just to rile people up, or cause friction. I don't pick fights, and I don't try to force my views on others. So I rarely find myself having to defend my views other than to myself. And I find myself very easy to get along with. So I have little to no anxiety about my gender identity. Only my wife finds it a bit difficult at times. And I do what I can to make it easier for her without sacrificing my integrity. And that is the core of my answer to your question Flame. I am not conflicted within myself about this, and I don't debate the topic with anyone. About the only time this particular side of my personality affects my decisions is when I shop for clothing that I feel I can get away with wearing, given my general approach to my life. And I suppose it makes me hang about with you lot. Which also improves my life IMHO.