[girlalex]

a response i posted on crossdressers.com that i should have posted over here got deleted because it was inappropriate for the specific forum that i posted it in. in addition to that they deleted my post because it was TMI. how the heck am i supposed to properly explain myself if i don't provide too much information plus i wasn't even using an inappropriate language. they are so anal about things its ridiculous. and if u mention anything about herbals no one would listen to you.

anyways. because of my gander issues i wasn't ever been able to to stay in a relationship because i felt like i wasn't a proper boyfriend material. i've been on dates but they seemed awkward because i had a hard time keeping the conversation. i had nothing really to say because i was nervous. i guess the root of this problem was because i do find females attractive but their private are is not something that gets me going. i mean i can have a girl as my friend but as soon as i feel like im being hit on, it makes me feel uncomfortable because i don't know how to respond because i don't know how i feel about it and i don't want to hurt anyone if i change my mind about not being with that person anymore. when i feel like a girl sees me as a gentlemen or "her man" it turns me off because they see me in a way i don't like to be seen as.

and that's how my gander issues has effected my love life.

with guys is a different story. there are much much fewer guys that im attracted to than girls. i would go out with a guy on a date but i don't want to be thought of as gay because it would make me feel uncomfortable just like an average straight female wouldn't want to dress like a guy when going out on a date with a guy. yet i don't like the idea of dressing like a girl because i don't wanna look like a dude in a dress which is why i've been doing herbals so that female clothes would look more convincing on me.
has anyone feels the same?
any feed back would be appreciated