[Samantha Rogers]

Well, it's Monday. Stupid, bloody Monday.
It was an eventful weekend, to say the least.
I have been off SP for more than a week, and without anything but PM and Fish Oil since last week. My Peony capsules arrived today (900 mg) and I have taken one as I expect to do daily. I will acquire more Spearmint probably today. In the meantime, I have observed a stirring in my "boy bits" for the first time in ages, most likely as a result of the lack of a strong anti androgen. But that currently occupies little of my attention.
The last four years have been a time of mounting pressure. While always telling myself that keeping "Samantha" hidden was the best course for me in terms of shielding my wife from unnecessary stress, I have found my own stress level becoming unmanageable. Duh.
I am not yet certain as to the wisdom of my actions, but for better or worse, yesterday my wife and I had "the talk".
It was a stressful day.
She took it well, and certainly as well or better than I had any right to expect.
To have this dropped in her lap after 20 plus years totally in the dark was a shock, and she is still dealing with this news. I have absolutely no way of knowing how she will react as she comes to terms with this over the coming days, weeks,or months. I hope for the best, but I am prepared, at least as well as I think I am able, for the worst. She is an extraordinary woman, and I have been blessed to know her as my wife and friend. I dearly hope I have made the right choice as it will be a terrible thing, a totally devastating thing if I have not, for it will practically kill me if I lose her. But, I believe, regardless of the outcome, that continuing to deceive someone I love so deeply, was simply wrong.
This is going to be "interesting"
Please wish me well. I have come to love so many of you as valued friends...I can use all the support I can get.
Love
Samantha

PS - Sorry to seem so darned serious, girls...this is not easy stuff...LOL...I will try to find a smile and some flip personality again as soon as I can...nobody loves a sick cat, as we all know.