[Miranda-nata-est]

Wow!!

The thing that never fails to amaze me about this website is the amount of time and effort that some folk give to helping others during tricky spells. It is awesome.

In general, this episode whilst extremely difficult to rationalise has probably been a good thing for me really. Several issues were wound up in it which I would have had to deal with at some stage . It is almost certainly better to have tackled them head on now rather than meeting up with them unprepared further along the journey.

The two feature length productions which this thread prompted have been particularly helpful and are a valuable resource for those of us following a bit further back on the trail. Even though we are all on slightly different paths, there is just so much common ground and so many experiences and difficulties which we all share.

This point about bearing in mind that I am now in a much better place than I was before recognising the GD and beginning to do something about it, is THE ONE for me at the moment. It really doesn’t matter where this all ends up, it is without doubt the only path I have available and discovering the cause of the underlying unease in my life has been the best thing ever. (I still want to be a princess really, if I possibly can!!!).

Life begins at 57 some say - well I do anyway!!.

The other thing this episode has bought out is the need to keep a diary and to keep photographs as a record of the journey. I know everyone says 'keep pictures' but up till now I haven't specifically bothered and I think this was a mistake. E for effort - must try harder!!!

Thanks again

Miranda

[The First Aria]

To fully transition, is LOTS of full strength hormones, monitored by an endocrinologist, and $$$$$ LOT of this for plastic surgery. Then, you can look like Miss, Mrs, Ex Bruce Jenner.

Isn't that right Clara???

[GoneGirl]

To fully transition, is LOTS of full strength hormones, monitored by an endocrinologist, and $$$$$ LOT of this for plastic surgery. Then, you can look like Miss, Mrs, Ex Bruce Jenner.

Isn't that right Clara???

Transitioning will be as big a step to take in your life as anything you can come up with, and more difficult. It is emotionally, physically, and financially demanding. It’s like embarking on an expedition into uncharted territory. Uncharted in that everyone’s circumstances are unique – the players, the setting, the dream.

Have you ever done something, and looking back, thought that if you’d known then what you know now, you wouldn’t have done it? Many people jump into things, biting off more than they can chew, and end up choking to death. The landscape is filled with unfinished projects that turned out to be way more difficult than envisioned.

On the other hand, if you managed to survive your endeavor, you probably looked back feeling proud that you had the courage to take on and accomplish the seemingly impossible.

Gender transitioning is like that. You’ve got to be crazy to even think about doing it, right? It’s a daunting process, and about as safe as crossing a minefield. If you set out to transform yourself to live life as a woman, you’d better know what you’re up against and have a pretty good idea how to do it.

What are the potential roadblocks to accomplishing your goal?

1) Fear. It took me a life time to overcome the fear of accepting who I was.

2) Acceptance. Actually, the lack of it from close family. It’s so much harder to transition if loved ones are opposed. It can mean having to end a marriage, and, possibly, never see your children and/or grandchildren again.

3) Bigotry. It’s a dirty word, but it lives. If it infests your place of employment, it can mean losing your job.

4) Anatomy. That which makes a man appear masculine makes it very difficult for a trans woman to look feminine. Masculine facial features can be removed, but our skeletal frame cannot be altered.

5) Pain. You’ll have to become a friend to pain beginning with laser/electrolysis facial hair removal, and that’s just the beginning.

6) Money. Transitioning can be very expensive depending on the medical interventions you need to function happily as a woman in society. In addition to the cost of anti-androgen and estrogen prescriptions:

>>Therapy
>>Facial hair removal
>>Facial feminization
>>Male pattern baldness hairline restoration
>>Breast augmentation
>>Gender confirmation surgery
>>Liposuction and fat transfer
>>Voice feminization

Costs vary widely, but can total as much as $100K

7) Reintegration. Transition often means starting over. New home, new job, and new relationships. It can be a period of intense loneliness and adjustment to a new reality. This can be the hardest challenge of all, and failure to adapt can lead to feelings of despair and depression.

So, what could possibly be worth enduring such hardship?

That’s simple.....It's the joy of finally feeling at peace with yourself.

Clara

[Miranda-nata-est]

In addition to Clara's points, I would add that there is a huge level of commitment needed - one has to be almost 100% focussed at every stage to the detriment of other things. To achieve great results involves intense will power, emotional strength, physical well being and staying power. It will also require you devote vast amounts of time - it will dominate all other calls on your resources. Don't get me wrong, the rest of life does go on, but it has to be shoehorned in around all the many processes that transition requires. Transition does not 'just happen', it involves more effort than anything I have ever done. The emotional demands are huge, the learning curve of self discovery very steep indeed.

Yes, to transition is clearly possible but the journey is a tortuous one, beset with traps all along the way. That is why I was saying 'Thank you' to those who share of themselves so others do not have to re-invent the wheel..

So my answer to Clara's question "what could possibly be worth enduring such hardship?" would primarily be "because there is no other realistic option ".

The joy of finally becoming at one with the world around you and experiencing it for the first time in its entirety is immeasurable, at times overwhelming and is unexplainable to those who haven't gone through the same re-birth; this joy will, in my opinion, only come to those who journey the path for the right reasons.


Miranda

[GoneGirl]

So excellently stated, Miranda. You are absolutely correct in everything you've said. I have devoted extraordinary amounts of time to my transition. It is my #1 priority, and has been for over a year now, and I see another full year of equal commitment and effort to complete my journey. Even then, I will have to work to hone the edges and polish the surfaces of my womanhood.

It is possible to throttle back the transition process to some extent to allow time for all the other demands on one's time and attention. For me there was no time to waste.

Clara