17-04-2025, 08:59 PM
These two did not make the cut off limit of my previous post
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I was unsure about if I was budding or not since how much muscle I previously had on my chest. I figured the puffy look was from the skin being looser due to muscle loss, and this puffy look was how my chest was before I started steroids over ten years ago. So that was a normal look to my chest.
I'm currently down from 205-210lbs to 188-195lbs. Strength has definitely decreased. I'm down about 20-50 lbs off all of the weights I typically use for my workouts.
Chest before was 48.5, then 44 on nbe and now currently is 45.5
Under bust before was 44, then 41 on nbe, and now is 40-42
Obviously the look and shape has changed from the picture during one of my last steroid cycles to being on nbe to now being on hrt.
Other things to note is there is a slight discomfort on and under my nipples for about 2 months now. They def seem to hard all the time and have slightly gotten wider/bigger.
Wait was 34, then 36 and now is currently 35 depending on the day and time when measured.
Hips (measured around fullest part of my bum) were 37, and are now 40.
So my body shape is def changing although I can't really see it even with before and after pictures.
Skin is def softer, face looks younger, hair in general (body face and top of my head) has not changed much.
Being on E and Spiro (even for only the month or so I was on it) I def felt like I had no energy, felt neither man or female, but the noise in my head vanished pretty much all together.
Since I have only been on E for a few months now I feel better (stronger and healthier), my energy is hit or miss, the mental fog and noise has returned to an extent unfortunately, and I feel like a man (unfortunately).
We will see how the progesterone effects me. Hopefully my energy doesn't change too much and hopefully it.doesnt make me gain weight too much.
My therapist wants me to figure out how I can show up as her without outwardly presenting as her. She gave me an example of a woman who teaches Sunday school and that activity makes her feel most authentic. This is something that she wants me to figure out since I'm kind sorta stuck/at a standstill with my transition due to a number of things from family, doubts, fears of potential negative outcomes , and gaslighting myself.
Thats pretty much everything I can think of. I hope everyone is doing well. I leave you all with this thought:
These are scary times indeed. All you can do is control how you show up in the circumstances and situations you find yourself in, and the more we are able to keep a positive outlook and mind set the more we will see all the good things and positive things that are in our lives, and showing gratitude will allow more positive things to enter our lives.
These times are just a test for us all in our own ways and personal battles. Just like in any book or movie or story the universe tests and challenges the main character right before they level up, to make sure they're ready to step into their true self (and all the positive things that come with living your truth).
We are the main character of our lives. It's up to us to continue to try to stay strong and positive as much as we can so we can show the universe that we're ready, that this test will not break us, but only make us stronger, which will also give us the strength to step into our truest versions of ourselves
I'm currently down from 205-210lbs to 188-195lbs. Strength has definitely decreased. I'm down about 20-50 lbs off all of the weights I typically use for my workouts.
Chest before was 48.5, then 44 on nbe and now currently is 45.5
Under bust before was 44, then 41 on nbe, and now is 40-42
Obviously the look and shape has changed from the picture during one of my last steroid cycles to being on nbe to now being on hrt.
Other things to note is there is a slight discomfort on and under my nipples for about 2 months now. They def seem to hard all the time and have slightly gotten wider/bigger.
Wait was 34, then 36 and now is currently 35 depending on the day and time when measured.
Hips (measured around fullest part of my bum) were 37, and are now 40.
So my body shape is def changing although I can't really see it even with before and after pictures.
Skin is def softer, face looks younger, hair in general (body face and top of my head) has not changed much.
Being on E and Spiro (even for only the month or so I was on it) I def felt like I had no energy, felt neither man or female, but the noise in my head vanished pretty much all together.
Since I have only been on E for a few months now I feel better (stronger and healthier), my energy is hit or miss, the mental fog and noise has returned to an extent unfortunately, and I feel like a man (unfortunately).
We will see how the progesterone effects me. Hopefully my energy doesn't change too much and hopefully it.doesnt make me gain weight too much.
My therapist wants me to figure out how I can show up as her without outwardly presenting as her. She gave me an example of a woman who teaches Sunday school and that activity makes her feel most authentic. This is something that she wants me to figure out since I'm kind sorta stuck/at a standstill with my transition due to a number of things from family, doubts, fears of potential negative outcomes , and gaslighting myself.
Thats pretty much everything I can think of. I hope everyone is doing well. I leave you all with this thought:
These are scary times indeed. All you can do is control how you show up in the circumstances and situations you find yourself in, and the more we are able to keep a positive outlook and mind set the more we will see all the good things and positive things that are in our lives, and showing gratitude will allow more positive things to enter our lives.
These times are just a test for us all in our own ways and personal battles. Just like in any book or movie or story the universe tests and challenges the main character right before they level up, to make sure they're ready to step into their true self (and all the positive things that come with living your truth).
We are the main character of our lives. It's up to us to continue to try to stay strong and positive as much as we can so we can show the universe that we're ready, that this test will not break us, but only make us stronger, which will also give us the strength to step into our truest versions of ourselves
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