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(13-07-2014, 05:46 PM)echapman Wrote: I don't think it's as much us trying to copy you as it is the fact that we live in a society where it is respectable and great to take on masculine traits , but femininity is seen as a weakness.
I think you've got it right, Emily. Somehow over the eons, natural selection has favored physical and behavioral gender distinctions between males and females, probably because it has helped the human species survive over millions of years. That formula seems to be hard coded in our DNA. Cultural norms tend to flow from the genetic imprints that enforce gender markers in the population.
In Norway, probably the most gender equal country in the developed world, men and women strive even harder to distinguish between their sexual roles through differences in gender expression. It all seems so unfair, but it is what it is.
Clara
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I'm really not sure. In my everyday existence I dress as I observe other women to dress, so in this hot summer weather it's tank tops and shorts, sun dresses or maxi dresses. I guess the latter are more girly girl, as you describe it. I dont very consciously change my behavior, but I am interested in the kinds of things I talk about with other GGs. How it feels to me and how it appears to others...two different things.
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All I know is this...most of my life I was wearing a straitjacket...self imposed. A set of coded instructions set to control me and fit me into patterns ranging from clothing to speech...movement, what I could laugh at , like, dislike, and so on through every detail of my existance...all to make absolutely certain not one tiny fragment of what I presented to the world would appear as anything but male and so not be subject to doubts.
Now that I no longer care, I feel so incredibly liberated. And discovering all that I have missed is wonderful, eye opening and illuminating. Some things are very different, as in now feeling free to dance. But other areas are just an extension of tastes I already had only now free to explore fully. Taste in clothing is actually very similar. I have no interest in frill petticoats or most brightly colored garments and I am still put off in most cases by bright patterns. Just as my male taste ran from leather jackets and black jeans to Armani suits (when I could afford them...lol) So I now find my tastes running from the simple but chic gray, black and white designs of HM and similar stores at one end, on through to the high end Fifth Ave styles with no stop whatsoever in the middle for the soccer mom suburban styles. I detest most anything with flowers on it...lol...
I guess some things never change. Still, the person I am slowly becoming is certainly female. Just authentically grounded now and not an impersonation of a lie.
It might be nice were my new freer self better suited to the middle class lifestyle I can actually afford. Sadly, this bitch seems to have expensive tastes...lol...and she likes diamonds.
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(15-07-2014, 02:03 PM)Samantha Rogers Wrote: All I know is this...most of my life I was wearing a straitjacket...self imposed. A set of coded instructions set to control me and fit me into patterns ranging from clothing to speech...movement, what I could laugh at , like, dislike, and so on through every detail of my existence...all to make absolutely certain not one tiny fragment of what I presented to the world would appear as anything but male and so not be subject to doubts.
Now that I no longer care, I feel so incredibly liberated. And discovering all that I have missed is wonderful, eye opening and illuminating. Some things are very different, as in now feeling free to dance. But other areas are just an extension of tastes I already had only now free to explore fully...
...Still, the person I am slowly becoming is certainly female. Just authentically grounded now and not an impersonation of a lie.
Bam!!!!!!! You NAILED it for me too Sammie (minus the stuff about fashion and dancing). I love the infinite color and variety of clothing made for women as well as all the adornments. We agree about the flower crap though. Yuck!
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My taste in clothing leans toward the more conservative styles for public dress. Part of that is just dressing in a way that is age appropriate, although I wouldn't touch many of the styles women in their upper 60s wear. I like colorful tops and shorts for summer casual. I love pink, but try to tone it down. I also am repelled by flowered prints in most cases, although I have seen some nice designs here and there. I guess from where I'm coming from it doesn't take much for me to feel 'girly', which is good because I love the feeling. I love everything about GGs, really. Well, maybe not EVERYTHING!...giggle.
Clara
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Well I like it ALL
Depends on my mood but sometimes I love the bright "flowery crap"
I also love just about anything sparkly and glittery
I dont really go for reds, purples or pinks anymore though except for nails occasionally... Lately I have a huge thing for blues and greens and blacks and whites....
Also Ive found a new appreciation for higher end stuff
Id say Id be very happy as a high maintenance, high end, high class girly princess
Lately I find myself wanting pricier stuff I used to give my EX girly girl GF grief about
$300.00 outfits and $400.00 purses dont seem so outrageous anymore UNFORTUNATELY for me
Actually thats a huge 180 for me, because I was a SLOB as a guy
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I know I'm a GG, but I haven't always been "feminine". I think part of the reason I've embraced my gender is because of this site. Especially my TG friends on here. You're all so strong and beautiful. You're inspirations to even us bio females.
For a long time I was plain jane... Or at some points wore more masculine clothes. I kept my hair chin length, no makeup, lots of flannel and jeans... I was one of the guys. I was your stereotypical girl saying "I just get along with guys better! Girls are bitches!"
I did the natural thing because that's what my ex liked. Then when I started dating my husband he liked me in dresses, but he's still very anti-lipstick/nail polish/big curly hair/ etc. I tip toed around what he liked and didn't like for a long time.
When I got to this site I had gone through several phases trying to find where I fit. Anywhere from pin-up to nearly grunge without being too over the top. Never too "girly". I could never find a balance of what I liked while still being natural, not too feminine. I was slowly getting into feminism. I wanted to be tough. I wanted my husband to think I was pretty. I went through a short-lived "bohemian" phase.
I got serious about nbe and I realized what it felt like to be in control of my body. The more feminine my body became, the more I embraced myself and what I like... What I like and not what my husband or anyone else likes! It felt good and it was empowering! These days I'm modeling my dream body from classic pin-ups. I love my vintage dresses and my red lipstick. My Pinterest over-flows with 40s fashion and done up hair and faces. Lately the girlier I am the more empowered I feel. I've even picked up sewing with the intention to eventually make all my own clothing out of vintage patterns I find at antique stores. I want to find a good medium between dita Von teese and Zooey deschanel.
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Emily, you are something! I love it.
Clara
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15-07-2014, 07:46 PM
(This post was last modified: 15-07-2014, 08:05 PM by
SarahSchilling.)
Reading that, it's no wonder you seem to get along well with this side of the forum
.
Being what other people want you to be isn't much fun, its hardly even being alive, but instead feels like you're merely playing a part in the play of life! I'm glad you stopped doing that. Your post actually cheered me up a little somehow.
You rock, bitch! :+P
On a side note that's kinda related to this thread, since I've started venturing out en femme, I can't bring myself to wear anything that doesn't show off my cleavage.
I have tons of stuff to wear but I'm like addicted to showing it! I don't even want attention from people, and yet....
I dont get it, but this has to be "girly girl", right? LOL
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(15-07-2014, 02:03 PM)Samantha Rogers Wrote: All I know is this...most of my life I was wearing a straitjacket...self imposed. A set of coded instructions set to control me and fit me into patterns ranging from clothing to speech...movement, what I could laugh at , like, dislike, and so on through every detail of my existance...all to make absolutely certain not one tiny fragment of what I presented to the world would appear as anything but male and so not be subject to doubts.
That's EXACTLY what I was talking about in my other thread about I feel I've evolved!!
