Eva, a few days ago, I was on a bus and there, sitting in the middle seat way in the back, sprawled out all over the place, arms and legs spread wide, but wearing what looked like guy attire (jeans and a red t-shirt) was this black girl. I'm guessing it was a girl, but she sure carried herself like a guy with a STRONG "I don't give a fuck" attitude!! Her tits were pretty obvious, which is why I'm guessing it was a girl, but, I never really found out if it WAS a girl, or a guy with very obvious tits who just didn't give a fuck if anybody saw them!! And I thought, 'THAT'S the kind of attitude you and others of our ilk here should adopt!!
And, not to start a fight over anything, but, if someone gets in your face about, just get back into theirs! "Yeah? So I got tits!! So what!!"

Eva, a few days ago, I was on a bus and there, sitting in the middle seat way in the back, sprawled out all over the place, arms and legs spread wide, but wearing what looked like guy attire (jeans and a red t-shirt) was this black girl. I'm guessing it was a girl, but she sure carried herself like a guy with a STRONG "I don't give a fuck" attitude!! Her tits were pretty obvious, which is why I'm guessing it was a girl, but, I never really found out if it WAS a girl, or a guy with very obvious tits who just didn't give a fuck if anybody saw them!! And I thought, 'THAT'S the kind of attitude you and others of our ilk here should adopt!!
And, not to start a fight over anything, but, if someone gets in your face about, just get back into theirs! "Yeah? So I got tits!! So what!!"

I take your point MM, it does have merit but is not for everyone. I , for instance, do adopt that attitude but in a much more passive way.
I boldly go about my trans life with a certain DGAF attitude but do not.court trouble.

HH

"And, not to start a fight over anything, but, if someone gets in your face about, just get back into theirs! "Yeah? So I got tits!! So what!!"

Ehh most people seem to like mine, and they really aint that big yet

I mean guys that dont know like them, (guys just like boobs ya know)... If I do let a guy know about me the first question is always, "are those real"... If its a girl I'll usually just put it right back to them with "same as yours, their real right" Some women are REALLY into the whole idea

Of course I have had amazingly ZERO problems so far just being ME
What I mean is while I'll put a lot of effort into getting my presentation down as far as clothes and appearance goes, my voice just plain sucks But it must be good enough somehow, it seems to work fine for me in person but not so much on the phone By that I mean not overdressed or made up with clothes that fit right on my less than perfect femme figure.... I mean I get compliments everytime I go out and PLENTY of positive attention from the guys

When I say "I just dont give a fuck" I mean I really just dont care if Im "read" or not.... I mean Im just me and Im happy and apparently "pretty" or at least slowly getting there I mean really aside from potentially dangerous situations I try to avoid I really dont worry about much...

I did find a new bar I really like last night, its apparently the unofficial "alt lifestyles" watering hole I mean its just "anything goes", from gay guys and girls, to MtF (Me) and I even met a cool FtM last night But also plenty of "straight" people in the mix.... For such an allegedly "conservative" place Ive found its actually a surprisingly accepting "live and let live" town I think thats probably true of most of the upper midwest/northwest in general though compared to "liberal" places like Chicago where I grew up Or maybe things are just getting better in general for trans people, whatever, I'll take it

All that said we'll see how it goes in a more "real" setting soon.... I have made it through one testing session with the USPS so far and I have to go back tomorrow for a 90 minute test... Im trying to get a mail sorting job, totally openly MtF trans woman too I also have an interview for a "housekeeping" (maid job) at an old folks home.... Im just looking to get my foot in the door somewhere and to try working as a woman... Of course the USPS job would really be sweet though You never know with these GOV agencies, they just might want to "diversify", and there really aint many people like me around here

All that said my tits are getting hard to miss these days and looking pretty good I must say Thats just an unpadded 38 B t-shirt bra and the outfit I was wearing last night out and about downtown Rapid City SD I was a bit lit up by this point and my selfies usually suck, always hard to get a good pic

Eva, a few days ago, I was on a bus and there, sitting in the middle seat way in the back, sprawled out all over the place, arms and legs spread wide, but wearing what looked like guy attire (jeans and a red t-shirt) was this black girl. I'm guessing it was a girl, but she sure carried herself like a guy with a STRONG "I don't give a fuck" attitude!! Her tits were pretty obvious, which is why I'm guessing it was a girl, but, I never really found out if it WAS a girl, or a guy with very obvious tits who just didn't give a fuck if anybody saw them!! And I thought, 'THAT'S the kind of attitude you and others of our ilk here should adopt!!
And, not to start a fight over anything, but, if someone gets in your face about, just get back into theirs! "Yeah? So I got tits!! So what!!"

I take your point MM, it does have merit but is not for everyone. I , for instance, do adopt that attitude but in a much more passive way.
I boldly go about my trans life with a certain DGAF attitude but do not.court trouble.

HH

As I said, I didn't say that meaning one SHOULD cause trouble, just be YOU.
I'm just now wondering if guys wanting to grow tits is actually a trend, now? Look at how VERY many around the world there are!! It's almost like tattoos and piercings!! 40 years ago, no guy in his right mind would've EVER wanted a pierced ear! He'd have been pegged as gay. Almost no one got tattoos! Now, suddenly, you HAVE to have both, and lots of them, to hang out with the cool kids!! Pretty soon, guys with tits will be the norm and will take over. Tits are no longer JUST for girls anymore!!

"And, not to start a fight over anything, but, if someone gets in your face about, just get back into theirs! "Yeah? So I got tits!! So what!!"

Ehh most people seem to like mine, and they really aint that big yet

I mean guys that dont know like them, (guys just like boobs ya know)... If I do let a guy know about me the first question is always, "are those real"... If its a girl I'll usually just put it right back to them with "same as yours, their real right" Some women are REALLY into the whole idea

Of course I have had amazingly ZERO problems so far just being ME
What I mean is while I'll put a lot of effort into getting my presentation down as far as clothes and appearance goes, my voice just plain sucks But it must be good enough somehow, it seems to work fine for me in person but not so much on the phone By that I mean not overdressed or made up with clothes that fit right on my less than perfect femme figure.... I mean I get compliments everytime I go out and PLENTY of positive attention from the guys

When I say "I just dont give a fuck" I mean I really just dont care if Im "read" or not.... I mean Im just me and Im happy and apparently "pretty" or at least slowly getting there I mean really aside from potentially dangerous situations I try to avoid I really dont worry about much...

I did find a new bar I really like last night, its apparently the unofficial "alt lifestyles" watering hole I mean its just "anything goes", from gay guys and girls, to MtF (Me) and I even met a cool FtM last night But also plenty of "straight" people in the mix.... For such an allegedly "conservative" place Ive found its actually a surprisingly accepting "live and let live" town I think thats probably true of most of the upper midwest/northwest in general though compared to "liberal" places like Chicago where I grew up Or maybe things are just getting better in general for trans people, whatever, I'll take it

All that said we'll see how it goes in a more "real" setting soon.... I have made it through one testing session with the USPS so far and I have to go back tomorrow for a 90 minute test... Im trying to get a mail sorting job, totally openly MtF trans woman too I also have an interview for a "housekeeping" (maid job) at an old folks home.... Im just looking to get my foot in the door somewhere and to try working as a woman... Of course the USPS job would really be sweet though You never know with these GOV agencies, they just might want to "diversify", and there really aint many people like me around here

All that said my tits are getting hard to miss these days and looking pretty good I must say Thats just an unpadded 38 B t-shirt bra and the outfit I was wearing last night out and about downtown Rapid City SD I was a bit lit up by this point and my selfies usually suck, always hard to get a good pic

Yeah, LOTS of women love them!! Brian Zembic said his women love them because it gives them something to hold onto during sex.
Just being you...yeah, that IS cool!!!!
My friend, Carla's, natural voice sounds perfectly fine for a woman, but she puts on this fake-sounding high-pitched voice in public. Her boss, Wendi, is the same way, except for the fake sounding voice. Her voice is perfectly fine for a woman, but she suddenly goes into this very soft higher-pitched voice when she's in public.
That's great! And you really shouldn't HAVE to worry about just being you in public!! But, ya know, you get these drunk, stupid, self-righteous assholes that think it's THEIR way or the highway and if you don't fit what THEY think you SHOULD be, they, then, have the right, given to them by the invisible man that lives in the sky, to hurt, or even kill you, with NO foul on them at ALL!!
Sounds great!! You seem to have found a really cool place to be!! :-)
The post office thing would be great, but be careful of government agencies!! I hear Chase Bank is also pro-TS and CD, but I wouldn't work for them for ANY amount!!
Yeah! Your tits are a LOT bigger than they were in the last pic I saw of you!! Pretty damn nice!!!
So THAT'S what a girl's bathroom looks like!! No urinals, hunh?
Just kidding, I've been in girls' bathrooms at least a dozen times. Especially with my last bass player (if you can CALL her a bass player!! She SUCKED!!!!). Every time someone wanted to take pictures of us at a gig, she made SURE that we took one in the men's room and another in the women's room!! I think it's some kind of fetish she has!! How classy to have all your shots taken in public bathrooms!! :-P

OK here's an interesting little story... So yesterday I was out and about town putting in job applications... Thats really no fun either with ZERO female work experience BTW but fuck it, these are entry level jobs I did pass the postal workers exam 473 with a score of 79.20%... Apparently you need at least a 70 to get hired and an 85 is a top score o we'll see how that goes

So far Ive been including my past 20 years experience in the steel forging industry... I just put down my old name and ask them to use that if they want to check it out... I mean there is unfortunately no hiding my past YET.... First of all I doubt Im THAT passable and second the M on my DL gives me away anyway

So anyway it was pretty hot yesterday and the AC in my van has a SLOW leak... Adding one can of freon is enough to keep it working for a month or so....
SO I stopped at Napa and got a can and put it in... The van was running... I get ready to go and WTF Im somehow locked out

So I had go back in there and ask if anyone could help me get it unlocked Well this cute mechanic/machinist guy is all over it thank GOD He had all the locksmith tools and opened it right up for me

I guess I "passed" well enough because I was just correctly gendered as Mam and nothing suggested anyone even had much of a clue While that whole ordeal sucked I guess I cant complain with how it all worked out for me

So back to my program.... For some reason this last shot doesn't seem as effective as the last three even with the increase

Still not feeling good and still need a good amount of additional E to get there

I did notice she did the injection a bit higher last time and maybe thats why

I think for the next one Im gonna request 10mg and have her show me exactly how to do it in my thigh and hopefully that will do it....

So far there has been no charge for the needles.... I wonder if my insurance is covering that??? I would like to learn how to do it myself

So yesterday I didnt take much supplemental E, 3mg gel in the morning then 4mg buccal....

I woke up in a COLD nasty sweat at 2AM Stuck a 2MG estrofem between the cheek and gum then slept like a baby until 8am

I seem to not sleep well at all without additional E at bedtime

Cant wait for my next shot tomorrow... BUT I dont think this IM EC is working out well for me at all I felt I was doing better on the old regime....

Well we did the last shot in my leg at 10mg and so far MUCH better

It just seemed like she went a bit too high in my butt on the last one and it was a rough week Its hard to "miss" in the leg I think and I had her show me how to do it myself... Seems pretty easy and I plan to do the next one myself under her supervision...

According to the IM injection instruction sheet she gave me an injection in the leg will be absorbed faster than in the butt and results in higher serum levels of medication...

Well Id say thats true because I can tell my E level is about right now

How can I tell??? Well when its too low I actually get menopausal/PMS symptoms

My skin just gets drier and rougher, body hair seems to grow faster and I just dont feel as good... Dysphoria is worse for sure

Also I have a hard time sleeping, lower energy, and I get bad night sweats and STRONG sugar cravings....

When its right..... My skin gets SUPER soft and body hair seems to slow down... I sleep MUCH better and the weird cravings go away

Also of course my dysphoria goes away too and I just feel WAY better... More fem and I do get a bit more EMO but in a good way... Oh I also notice my libido increases but not in a male way at all

SO... So far so good, no need to supplement E yet and hopefully this dosage will be good until my next one

All I can say is thank GOD for the spiro helping keep T cratered through all this... When its right I often forget to take it or feel no real need for it... But when its low no way, I NEED it...

I might try going back down to 200mg on this new dose because 300mg is a lot, I shouldnt need as much, and I might feel even better

Well time to order more E.... My doc REALLY does drive me nuts

I have enough for one more 10mg shot of EC and I keep saying I want to go with EV shots instead...

It seems regardless of the dosage the EC shot only lasts about 5 days for me then crashes...

So I was getting nowhere with the nurse talking to my doc... She did however agree with me that there should be no good reason why I couldn't lower dosage and increase frequency of shots in an attempt to level things out a bit... Why suffer from all the highs and lows???

I mean the script is 40mg a month... 6 shots in 30 days every 5 days at 7mg is 42mg.... Or could even go 5mg every 4 days, 42mg in 32 days ect... My doc agreed with that...

OK then SO tell me again WHY it is I have to go with EC when EV is cheaper AND in my opinion more bio identical than EC

Oh because your going by the "GUIDELINES" from the endo society that say EC for weekly injections and EV for biweekly injections.... They do say 40mg a month for either EV or EC, I want EV dammit....

I feel like I could definitely do my own injections now and I will start with every 5 days EV soon one way or the other EV even from Inhouse is MUCH cheaper than the EC Ive been taking... So I had to order some Progynon Depot to try, it should be here right in time for my next shot whether my doc keeps me on shots or not... I WILL be going to EV every 5 days... Probably 10mg to start...

SO all my bitching has resulted in moving my appointment up 3 weeks early to see the doc

This time he said he does want to have a blood test... Well its good Im seeing him on Thursday a week after my last shot.... While I do indeed "crash" after 5 days I gotta wonder if thats from a very high level to a more "normal" level...

So NO extra E and yep, right on time I can feel it crash, gonna be rough today and tomorrow... Wont see the doc until the afternoon, draw blood.... Then I will do the last EC shot myself and start doing them all myself from now on...

Ive also cut the spiro back to 200mg and Ive been feeling a bit better... 300mg is TOO much, I get real bad salt/sugar cravings that have eased considerably at 200mg... When I start shots every 5 days I think I will cut it back even further... Maybe 150mg and taper down to 100mg...

Ive been taking the P again at 200mg in the evenings...

AND last but not least Ive QUIT smoking cold turkey for a week now
That SHOULD help my E start to work better and its just one of MANY good reasons I have for quitting...

Its been rough but easier than I thought it would be... I started Zyban (wellbutrin/bupropion) yesterday, its supposed to help with the cravings but it takes at least a week to get going...

Supposed to be an antidepressant that reduces the cravings and takes away a lot of the pleasure from nicotine... Its also supposed to lower tolerance for alcohol... SO whats not to like here??? Quit smoking, save $$$ on booze even, and be all happy too LOL... We'll see about that