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Since everyone here has a sense of humor

#1

A 15 year old Amish boy and his father were in a mall.....

They were amazed by almost everything they saw, but especially by two shiny, silver walls that could move apart and then slide back together again.

The boy asked, 'What is this, Father?'

The father (never having seen an elevator) responded, 'Son, I have never seen anything like this in my life, I don't know what it is.'

While the boy and his father were watching with amazement, a fat old lady in a wheel chair moved up to the moving walls and pressed a button.

The walls opened, and the lady rolled between them into a small room. The walls closed and the boy and his father watched the small numbers above the walls light up sequentially. They continued to watch until it reached the last number. and then the numbers began to light in the reverse order.

Finally the walls opened up again and a gorgeous 24-year-old blond stepped out.

The father, not taking his eyes off the young woman, said quietly to his son.....

'Go get your Mother.'
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#2

seen that one!Big Grin

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#3

D'ya hear about the gay termite?
He only eats mail boxes.
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#4

Did you know there is a species of bee that makes milk rather than honey?

They're called boo-bees!
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#5

A guy from Conn. goes to visit his friend in Fla.. One morning, they decide to play a round of golf.
On the third tee, just as the guy from Conn. is about to to tee off, a naked woman BURSTS through the tall hedges behind him, runs across the tee, down the fairway and into a bank of trees a few hundred yards away!! A moment later, two guys in white coats burst through the hedges and chase after her!! Another moment later, ANOTHER guy in a white coat comes running through the hedges carrying two buckets of sand!!
Astonished, the guy from Conn. asks his friend, "What was THAT all about????" His friend tells him, "Oh, that's nothing, on the other side of those hedges is an insane asylum and that woman just escaped from there. She does it just about every day and those guys in the white coats are trying to catch her."
The Conn. guy says, "What about the guy with the two buckets of sand?"
His friend explains, "Oh, that's his handicap, he caught her last time."
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