[Epicene]

High doses of anything E can make the body reject it, and turn up the T. Many peeps with great success stories have historically been around 2000 mg or less per day. And many think taking a breast and letting the body reset is a plus.

I'm very much aware of this. My previous runs have only been on 500-1000mg a day though (I'm cheap ). The dose softened my skin a bit and gave me temporary swelling that went away after stopping. I did have the glandular soreness and swelling (budding), but that happens very easily for me probably due to the gyno. I figure I'll need a dose of 1500-2500 for significant development due to my trials. I'm no newbie, I'm just not very active.

Don't have to be a newbie to push too hard. Just ask Elaine. She screwed herself up quite a bit by overdoing it.

I know. It's just that the 500-1000 mg dose hasn't given me any permanent effects in over two years, and the 1500-2500 has in a 2 month trial period. BO was really effective for me in small doses for a month, but it doesn't seem to agree with my digestion. I don't really feel a need to push hard since I'm staying male, but when it's been two years, I feel like I should at least have a little bit more development. I'd do a slow titration if I start a new AA anyway.

[Ways Tonn]

Cafemaid said it best to me for my reasoning.

As well as flame.
Personally to me, it started out as a fetish. Always enjoyed masturbayion and in my late teens got bored of girl on girl and ventured to other categories. Found trans and was fascinated, fascination turned to fantasy and decade later (im 29) here i am. TG captions, forced feminization etc was and has always been my go to sources. I love the idea of it. Though never have had a gf who was so i kept it all a secret. 4 years ago i googled men wanting breasts, and found breast nexus. Did my research and took the plunge after about a year. Did a month at 3000mg (always been an anxious person wanting fast results) in 2 weeks my gf at the time was curious what was diff bout me claiming i smelled sweeter and felt softer and looked softer in features....didnt even put 2 an 2 togethwr myself but after a month i couldnt get erect and it scared me away. I quit for awhile and a year went by we broke up and right when i wanted to getback on the train i got another gf whom im with now and love very much.

Now up to date...
Its obviously always been fantasy but the more i dwell on it the more i realize how empty i feel ip top. Swimming etc may be a sacrifice but i truly feel sad that i dont have breasts. Maybe the on and off times of PM and Natureday have altered my desires abit but i just truly want round female like breasts. And while natureday does great i notice no one develops aureoles and nipples like pm delivers. Often tpo scared to take tge risk of impotence and infertility i find myself buying it taking for a few weeks then tossing it having countless "wtf am i doing" moments. I know i want them i feel i need them but not being trans or a cd and having a gf and both involved with our very accepting church and friends etc i just get scared, not overweight at all so feel it wont take much to poke out and while my gf is ok with bras long as its not push ups lace etc but basic collrs and styles i still worry if she'll lose attraction to me or leave if my chest truly develops in to a female set of breats nkt jjst in size shape and volume but aureoloes etc. And find myself seeing countless stories of 1 year plus and finally seeing anything.
But i will prevail and will have breasts of my own.
It was a fetish than a fantasy and after years of pondering and trying i realized its something i need for myself.
I feel this was a rant not an answer lol

[The First Aria]

What I have figured out from most of these post's in this thread is this.

It's definitely not one size fits all type of reason. It runs from starting as a fetish, feeling like something is missing to wanting to be a more "natural cross dresser".

But, we are not as small in numbers as we thought. Right?

[Ways Tonn]

Right lol. I def felt like a rarity up till now. Im personally not a cd though i have occasionally enjoyed dressing up just dont do it enough to put the lable on the bottle. I just want firm round fuller breasts. And to be accepted by those in my life as a man with lovely breasts lol is that possible

[Pansy-Mae]

I don't look in here very often and post even less frequently, these days, so I have only just seen Chrishoney's post from about a week ago.
I have to say that for me, I can echo almost every word of that post. 'I am what I am' and always have been, from a very early age. I have always been able to acept myself, even when I had no idea why I had this "abnormal" ( who says??) drive towards the feminine.

[The First Aria]

I sometimes wonder, if in my case, that maybe the insecurities of life just get to be too much.

Some peeps cope by drinking way too much, some smoke dope while others turn hostile.

My coping mechanism seems to be that I turn into a female on occasion. Deep down, I am not really sure what it does for me, other than maybe I live a fantasy for a few hr.'s per month or week. Don't get me wrong, I love an occasional beer. And Lord knows I love my Run and Pepsi/Coke, but there is something about dressing up and just chillin out that seem at least a little less physically damaging. LOL. I don't look at it as a fetish, just a coping mechanism. Does that make sense????

I got tired of trying to get fake boobs that actually looked real, so when I developed Gynecomastia I was somewhat angered because I just went thru a bad heart attack. But, then I thought "Hey, this could be a good thing since I like to dress up every so often!". I love the fact that when I shower, I don't have to worry about "peeling the fake one's off" or having to re glue them. I just shower, end of story.

Maybe one day, I will venture out in the world dressed somewhat feminine, who knows?

[Ways Tonn]

Makes total sense!!! For me it provides a sense of calming and relief from the world. I used to when I was 19 to early twenties (29 now) get on cam on yahoo chats and give a peep show for excitement. But that sexual sense turned to relaxation once when i got dressed and no one was home and i could roam freely in my heels and outfit and wig. It felt absolutely wonderful. Im not tg by any means i woukd never want to be a woman full time but but the ability to be something else momentarily and escape the bs of the life i did live for a time being was bliss. I wish i could still do it and wish my gf was okay with it all. Which she is she just does not want to see it and well thats tough since if im not working im in my studio gym or shes there lol all areas i cant really dress up.
When i googled men wanting to grow breasts cause of my long run of tg captions over riding my realities. I stumbled upon sites offering products i chose natureday cause it promised no uh oh to me hello lol and it was cheap. When it worked i freaked the f out and stopped for almost a year (this was 2010) and my gf then broke up with me after a dui accident i caused (dont blame her a bit) but saw it as an opportunity to go again. And when it continued to work i used what i bought and kept it there till about a year ago.
Currently if you feel my chest you will feel almost breast tissue all over it and under my arms and sides its super squishy. I wear a 34 to 36a cup and while theres space to fill still it fills up nicely enough to give proper shape.
I never thought it could legit happen without doctors, and now that i know it does my biggest fear isnt losing my gf or anything, its that i wont be able to stop myself and fantasy will become reality and i will wish it wasnt lol. But till then...

[The First Aria]

That fear, is what a lot of peeps here at BN call the "Pink Fog". I happen to believe it works something akin to if your G.Daddy lost his hair by 30, and so did you Dad, then you have a strong chance of loosing your hair by 30.

So, it's my belief that you have to at least have the hidden desire or brain wiring to want to be femme full time, and one must certainly be disgusted at being a male. THEN, and only then does the "Pink Fog" have a chance to grab you.

I truly don't believe that by altering your hormones, instantly can change you to be the opposite. I do believe it can cause you to soften up, change some attitudes but never make you a true female other than outside appearances and some differences in your moods.

[Ways Tonn]

I agree whole heartedly on that one. I remember reading a story about propecia and a guy named something changed it to mandi mckee saying propecia made him a transgender. Im like no it probably just unleashed what was already in there.
I dont believe at all hormones can alter your sexuality or identity. Hell they say if you take hormonal supplements and get depressed and anxiety etc than likely its cause your brain is in a wtf are you doing to me you fool state of mind hah opposed to those who grip it embrace it and feel more confident with it in their systems i.e. those who had it behind the curtain all along.
I know i took 2500mg doses out the gate my first time with pm and i lost function and was tired a lot and my balls shrank and that didnt make me happy at all i would try to get it up to no provail etc. It def wasnt changing me identity wise lol. This time round im gonna take 1p00mg a day and keep it at that till i see results in hopes i dont sterile myself or other stuff besides a bit of femming up.
I really am eager to get larger aureoles im hoping they grow and dont go through the awkwars puffy stage... single id love seeing my aureoles puffy as a cloud but with a gf id like to keep it discreet as can be lol. I never take my shirt off round her unless its dark and out the shower i put it round my back and over shoulders nkt cause im embarrassed but to not show off anything and let it be a surprise and act as if thats why i always cover up.. anyways... lol