Hello all,
I've been contemplating on how to proceed in regards to the option of integrating bra wearing in my daily wardrobe. The first option would be to continue with what I'm doing now: going braless and making no effort to conceal my development. The second option of course would be to start wearing a bra, most likely a sports bra. I almost never feel pain or discomfort from a lack of support in the chest area, so the argument for needing support is irrelevant at this time. If I choose to adopt bra wearing, the reason would be to achieve the illusion of being flat-chested. It's quite a paradox I think to wear a feminine garment to attain a masculine appearance. It's like I'm exchanging one secret for another. It also raises questions as to what my goal for NBE is. Is NBE about trying to grow breasts for my private aspirations, or to use my breast development to move closer to adopting an androgynous appearance?
I have to admit my history with crossdressing is one reason why I've been thinking more and more about this. However, crossdressing for me has always operated under two sets of guidelines: novelty/private or practical. Wearing a dress and heels can be enjoyable, but it's not something I'll wear when venturing in public. Wearing panties on the other hand does have practical motives. Since wearing underwear is nothing new to me, switching from male underwear to panties is not a huge leap for me. The same can't be said for bra wearing, especially since I've only been doing NBE for a few years now. Bra wearing on a full-time basis doesn't fit neatly into either guideline. Furthermore, arguing for bra wearing can be a bit complicated when considering I don't truly need the support and a lot of women wish they could get by without having to wear a bra.
I guess I'm trying to figure out what my motives are with this second option. Is it Flame the crossdresser that wants to go bra wearing full-time, or is it Flame the androgynous bio-male pursuing NBE that wants to step up bra wearing? If it's the former, I can rationalize it as just one of my crossdressing urges to be more daring. If it's the latter, it raises the question of whether I want to advance my position with achieving an androgynous appearance. Your thoughts?
For some reason, I feel like I'm giving a tour of the inner workings of my mind. I hope I haven't driven you insane or bored with my ramblings on this.
I've been contemplating on how to proceed in regards to the option of integrating bra wearing in my daily wardrobe. The first option would be to continue with what I'm doing now: going braless and making no effort to conceal my development. The second option of course would be to start wearing a bra, most likely a sports bra. I almost never feel pain or discomfort from a lack of support in the chest area, so the argument for needing support is irrelevant at this time. If I choose to adopt bra wearing, the reason would be to achieve the illusion of being flat-chested. It's quite a paradox I think to wear a feminine garment to attain a masculine appearance. It's like I'm exchanging one secret for another. It also raises questions as to what my goal for NBE is. Is NBE about trying to grow breasts for my private aspirations, or to use my breast development to move closer to adopting an androgynous appearance?
I have to admit my history with crossdressing is one reason why I've been thinking more and more about this. However, crossdressing for me has always operated under two sets of guidelines: novelty/private or practical. Wearing a dress and heels can be enjoyable, but it's not something I'll wear when venturing in public. Wearing panties on the other hand does have practical motives. Since wearing underwear is nothing new to me, switching from male underwear to panties is not a huge leap for me. The same can't be said for bra wearing, especially since I've only been doing NBE for a few years now. Bra wearing on a full-time basis doesn't fit neatly into either guideline. Furthermore, arguing for bra wearing can be a bit complicated when considering I don't truly need the support and a lot of women wish they could get by without having to wear a bra.
I guess I'm trying to figure out what my motives are with this second option. Is it Flame the crossdresser that wants to go bra wearing full-time, or is it Flame the androgynous bio-male pursuing NBE that wants to step up bra wearing? If it's the former, I can rationalize it as just one of my crossdressing urges to be more daring. If it's the latter, it raises the question of whether I want to advance my position with achieving an androgynous appearance. Your thoughts?
For some reason, I feel like I'm giving a tour of the inner workings of my mind. I hope I haven't driven you insane or bored with my ramblings on this.
Flame, I to went thru the same musings as you are now. But over the last 15 - 20 yrs.
I, like you, wear panties everyday, except to Doctor's. Even that, I am rethinking my position on. I am thinking how can you be honest and real, and still hide what you truly feel like. After all, panties do not show, unless you wear provocative clothing, which I never have. I think of myself as a conformist in many ways. I try not to dash my loved one's expectations.
But, at the stage of life I am now..... Medically retired, veteran of the Vietnam War Era, Father of 4 (2 still living), Grandfather to 11 youngsters, I find that I have to do what I feel is good and genuine for myself, and still try to take into consideration for my loved one's and family.
I balance this by doing things this way. Some days, I feel very feminine in outlook, temperament and want to be feminine. Then some days, I would like to play catch with my Grandson's, and work on the car and yard and fix things around the house that on my "Honey Do" list.
My wife knows of my proclivity for cross dressing, for she has seen some of my wardrobe. Is she happy about it?? NO. Does she understand?? Maybe.
A long story short.... I think Pansy-Mae is spot on. In the last 10 yrs especially, going day to day with my thoughts, feelings and desires have helped me stay sane. After all, isn't that the real importance of all of this, as we say in U.S., bull sh*t situation we call life??
But unlike Pansy, I do feel like I need a bra. My breast are more tender to the cold, heat and chaffing. Also, the weight of them are getting more noticeable with out support. And that for only 38 C's and sometime D's. LOL.. My only wish is that they make wider shoulder straps on all bra's. I am starting to get noticeable creases for such a reason, and sometimes they cut into me.
For the very reason I stated at the top of this rambling reply is why I feel I should start being honest with my Doctor with bra wearing as well.
Do I have it all worked out..... Heck no, but it's a process. Right?
After all, I am who I am and should be honest about the fact.
I, like you, wear panties everyday, except to Doctor's. Even that, I am rethinking my position on. I am thinking how can you be honest and real, and still hide what you truly feel like. After all, panties do not show, unless you wear provocative clothing, which I never have. I think of myself as a conformist in many ways. I try not to dash my loved one's expectations.
But, at the stage of life I am now..... Medically retired, veteran of the Vietnam War Era, Father of 4 (2 still living), Grandfather to 11 youngsters, I find that I have to do what I feel is good and genuine for myself, and still try to take into consideration for my loved one's and family.
I balance this by doing things this way. Some days, I feel very feminine in outlook, temperament and want to be feminine. Then some days, I would like to play catch with my Grandson's, and work on the car and yard and fix things around the house that on my "Honey Do" list.
My wife knows of my proclivity for cross dressing, for she has seen some of my wardrobe. Is she happy about it?? NO. Does she understand?? Maybe.
A long story short.... I think Pansy-Mae is spot on. In the last 10 yrs especially, going day to day with my thoughts, feelings and desires have helped me stay sane. After all, isn't that the real importance of all of this, as we say in U.S., bull sh*t situation we call life??
But unlike Pansy, I do feel like I need a bra. My breast are more tender to the cold, heat and chaffing. Also, the weight of them are getting more noticeable with out support. And that for only 38 C's and sometime D's. LOL.. My only wish is that they make wider shoulder straps on all bra's. I am starting to get noticeable creases for such a reason, and sometimes they cut into me.
For the very reason I stated at the top of this rambling reply is why I feel I should start being honest with my Doctor with bra wearing as well.
Do I have it all worked out..... Heck no, but it's a process. Right?
After all, I am who I am and should be honest about the fact.
This post was last modified: 19-09-2015, 04:08 PM by The First Aria.
iaboy, Check out HommeMystere.com. They carry a variety of lingerie made and designed for male bodies. Maybe you'll find some better strap support.
As to the reasoning for wanting to wear a bra, does it really matter? If it is what you like and what you're comfortable with why try and rationalize one way or another? I believe I have mentioned I wear them for protection, but even if I didn't have that justification for wearing one, I like to wear one. Not sure why, just feels right to me.
As to the reasoning for wanting to wear a bra, does it really matter? If it is what you like and what you're comfortable with why try and rationalize one way or another? I believe I have mentioned I wear them for protection, but even if I didn't have that justification for wearing one, I like to wear one. Not sure why, just feels right to me.
(20-09-2015, 12:55 AM)Fire And Ice Wrote: iaboy, Check out HommeMystere.com. They carry a variety of lingerie made and designed for male bodies. Maybe you'll find some better strap support.
As to the reasoning for wanting to wear a bra, does it really matter? If it is what you like and what you're comfortable with why try and rationalize one way or another? I believe I have mentioned I wear them for protection, but even if I didn't have that justification for wearing one, I like to wear one. Not sure why, just feels right to me.
I discovered them about 2 yrs ago. It's a great idea to lingerie for men, but I do not like how they are put together. To me they are sort of "cartoonish" in style and substance.
Pansy-Mae,
Yes, I do over-analyze myself at times. For instance, after looking at the 'male-mode bra' thread, I'm wondering if I go down this road, should I go with compression shirts or sports bras? The former is the safer option no doubt, but I don't want to be sweating like crazy either. Going with sport bras is riskier, but it would be cooler and it would indulge my crossdressing desires.
Iaboy,
I agree it's a process. However, it seems like just the step of taking action to wear undergarments to conceal my breast development is a big step on its own. It's like I'm either trying to backpedal from my NBE journey to an extent, or I'm going one step further to express my feminine tendencies.
Fire,
I think it's going to take time to adjust physically and mentally to going full-time with bra wearing.
Yes, I do over-analyze myself at times. For instance, after looking at the 'male-mode bra' thread, I'm wondering if I go down this road, should I go with compression shirts or sports bras? The former is the safer option no doubt, but I don't want to be sweating like crazy either. Going with sport bras is riskier, but it would be cooler and it would indulge my crossdressing desires.
Iaboy,
I agree it's a process. However, it seems like just the step of taking action to wear undergarments to conceal my breast development is a big step on its own. It's like I'm either trying to backpedal from my NBE journey to an extent, or I'm going one step further to express my feminine tendencies.
Fire,
I think it's going to take time to adjust physically and mentally to going full-time with bra wearing.
(20-09-2015, 02:04 AM)Lenneth Wrote: Have you considered only wearing one when you experience discomforts like sore/ sensitive nipples or concealing them when they are rock hard for whatever reason?
(Sports Bras can work just fine for that)
Discomfort isn't any issue for me other than running, and even then the discomfort isn't particularly painful. Rock hard nipples isn't an issue for me either.
My main motive for wearing one is for concealment at this point in time.
For me my nipples and areola are dark and I was using snake bite kits to enlarge them. My x-wife never was comfortable with me showing I was a cd or feminine. She said I need to wear a t-shirt to cover my hard nipples. I never really obeyed. I show pokies.
Now my breasts are more than a handful. I believe in the pencil test. If I place a pencil under my breasts it drops. So I do not require a bra. If that pencil stays up I will wear a bra for support.
Then there is when I take off my shirt in public. I never cover my top. I hope I never will. I like bathing suits that cover little. So my family has seen and other pool goers see too.
Now my breasts are more than a handful. I believe in the pencil test. If I place a pencil under my breasts it drops. So I do not require a bra. If that pencil stays up I will wear a bra for support.
Then there is when I take off my shirt in public. I never cover my top. I hope I never will. I like bathing suits that cover little. So my family has seen and other pool goers see too.
(19-09-2015, 04:07 PM)iaboy Wrote: I balance this by doing things this way. Some days, I feel very feminine in outlook, temperament and want to be feminine. Then some days, I would like to play catch with my Grandson's, and work on the car and yard and fix things around the house that on my "Honey Do" list.
Yup, thats pretty much the way I work as well.
(19-09-2015, 04:07 PM)iaboy Wrote: But unlike Pansy, I do feel like I need a bra. My breast are more tender to the cold, heat and chaffing. Also, the weight of them are getting more noticeable with out support. And that for only 38 C's and sometime D's. LOL..
Ahhh... there we are unfortunately different. If I could only get to a C cup I'd probably feel the same as you, but being stuck at 36b and not quite passing the 'pencil test', I dont really need a bra for support, although they do get a bit cold in chilly weather and a bra feels nice and warm.
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