So I felt the need to share an interesting experience last night, which helps explain my more uplifted mood today. In order to do so, I must bore you with a bit of backstory to help explain how it is I came to be in the situation I found myself in.
As I have mentioned I know my wife pretty well, I know what she likes, doesn't like, I know buttons to push to drive her to the brink of insanity, or the throws of ecstasy. What can I say, years of being an immature button pusher.
So sexually I know exactly what to do in order to get her in the mood. In my youth came in handy to get laid pretty much whenever I wanted. While that was fun and I enjoyed the challenge of building the enticement, there came a point that it wasn't enough, I wanted more. I wanted to be seduced, I wanted to feel what I made her to feel. I wanted her to get inside of my mind and make me scream in ecstasy.
Now before anyone asks, yes, I did express what I wanted, on numerous occasions, but she wasn't up for it. She didn't want to put for that effort like I did, and would prefer it if I did all the work. So began the game of cat and mouse that resulted in a long standing stalemate. When she was hot, I was cold, when I was hot, she was cold, and so it went back and forth.
Now, I am a pretty easy going person. I go with the flow, and just ride the waves. I try not to hold grudges, and rarely ever hold onto anger for any long periods. So in that respect, I am a pretty forgiving person. My wife is the opposite, oh, she can hold onto her anger, she can hold a grudge, and no matter how many times I try and calm her down, I somehow end up being the bad guy. With that being said, I went against my nature, and started to learn how to hold onto that anger, how to hold onto that rage. I don't know how people do it, it's awful, I've become something I am not, a short fused individual. So any and every little thing that has ever bothered me, and I have ever brought up in discussion with her I let it just trigger the maelstrom. She would snap at me for something, and I would snap back. Just a lot of ugliness, I started working harder and longer hours just to avoid any possible confrontations.
As I mentioned, I have the power to crush her mind and spirit, I know what buttons to press to wreak all kinds of havoc. I could be a very vengeful bitch. Now, I may have come close to wanting to pursue that due to situations at the time, but I managed to refrain. Sometimes there's just no undoing what has been said or done.
So fast forward to last night. I wanted to make her happy, I wanted to make her feel good. I wasn't looking for any type of reciprocation, I just wanted to push all the right buttons this time, and fill her with ecstasy as I had done in past times. So I straddled her and was about to kiss her neck and she shuns my attempt. I can't recall what she said as it immediately triggered my defenses. I immediately just went to my side of the bed. She attempted to apologize, but I was not having it. Here I was trying to make her happy and she has to be a jerk about it.
As I lay there completely ignoring her, I came to a realization, that this is not who I really am. This is the monster I have become. So I surprisingly backed down, and opened the lines of communication. I expressed to her my intentions, I just wanted to give her what she wanted, love and affection, nothing more nothing less. I told her that now she knows my interest, I made the effort, now the ball is in her court to decide what to do. But now she needs to let me know what she wants because I wasn't going to get hurt again. So she put down her phone and spooned me. Oh my goodness, I don't know why, but I love being the little spoon. It is a feeling like no other. Comfort, security, love warmth, everything rolled up into one.
Below is a bit detailed, highlight it if you wish you read it.
So I straddled her again, and slowly kissed up her neck to her ear. I let her feel the warmth of my breath with each soft and gentle kiss. I could feel her writhe beneath me as I slowly approached her lips. I kissed her softly and gently, and then kissed her very passionately. I proceeded to kiss her neck, ears and lips, teasing her and feeling her enjoyment. Now I'm not going to lie to you, I was enjoying myself as well. I may have purposely been rubbing my chest against hers, enjoying the softness of my camisole rubbing my nipples. What? I couldn't resist. I then kissed up and down her body, teasing her more and more. I kissed her all over. I finally got to her chest, and I kissed all around her breast, I purposely avoided her nipples to increase her wanting desire. Finally I went in for the kill and I could hear her breath escape. I knew she was loving every minute of it. I went back to kissing her neck and lips, and she started to play with my nipples through my camisole, and she made me gasp in ecstasy. As this continued, she asked me if this is why I enjoyed wearing these, I just grinned and groaned a soft giggle. We finally settled down, and I laid back and she rested her head on my shoulder. Then she went for the kill and teased my nipples. Oh, I was in heaven. Okay, so yeah I would have loved the same treatment I gave her, but I wasn't about to complain. She played and teased both of my nipples, and I was in sheer ecstasy. I was loving every minute of it. When she was done, I went back and gave her what she enjoys, I kissed her deeply and passionately. Afterwards we laid back and she rested her head on my shoulder and reached between my legs to find I was wearing panties. She let out a low growl of disapproval. I told her not to start, I asked her to please not ruin the moment. She proceeded to rub between my legs and told me that I was probably going to have to change. Sure enough, my panties were very moist. I just laughed and said oh well. Before anyone asks, no, it did not lead to other things. Her monthly friend would soon be leaving, but could be messy. That's not really my thing, I have a very sensitive nose, and I am not particularly fond of that smell.
So fast forward to next day in the afternoon, I was modeling some new shirts for her and I made the comment that my chest appeared a bit taught, where everywhere else fit very nicely. She said yeah, the buttons seem to be pulling a bit. She also commented on my nipples sticking out. I almost half joked guess I was going to need to wear a bra, but instead went with pasties. She just said noooo. I took my shirt off and had on of course a camisole and I was showing her how it stretched across my chest. I started to rub my nipples and she covered her eyes in disapproval. I told her that my nipples didn't seem to bother her last night. And she responded with another snide comment. I didn't let it show that it bothered me. So I don't know, to me feels like a one step forward two steps back kind of situation. Just when I think there is progress, it turns out, not really. I’ll bring it up again what I would like, but I fear it will fall of deaf ears. Sometimes I wonder how we have lasted so long. They say opposites attract, and while that may be the case, it is an awful pain in the you know what! Wait, this post originally started out positive, not sure how it changed in the end. Oh well cest la vie.
As I have mentioned I know my wife pretty well, I know what she likes, doesn't like, I know buttons to push to drive her to the brink of insanity, or the throws of ecstasy. What can I say, years of being an immature button pusher.
So sexually I know exactly what to do in order to get her in the mood. In my youth came in handy to get laid pretty much whenever I wanted. While that was fun and I enjoyed the challenge of building the enticement, there came a point that it wasn't enough, I wanted more. I wanted to be seduced, I wanted to feel what I made her to feel. I wanted her to get inside of my mind and make me scream in ecstasy.
Now before anyone asks, yes, I did express what I wanted, on numerous occasions, but she wasn't up for it. She didn't want to put for that effort like I did, and would prefer it if I did all the work. So began the game of cat and mouse that resulted in a long standing stalemate. When she was hot, I was cold, when I was hot, she was cold, and so it went back and forth.
Now, I am a pretty easy going person. I go with the flow, and just ride the waves. I try not to hold grudges, and rarely ever hold onto anger for any long periods. So in that respect, I am a pretty forgiving person. My wife is the opposite, oh, she can hold onto her anger, she can hold a grudge, and no matter how many times I try and calm her down, I somehow end up being the bad guy. With that being said, I went against my nature, and started to learn how to hold onto that anger, how to hold onto that rage. I don't know how people do it, it's awful, I've become something I am not, a short fused individual. So any and every little thing that has ever bothered me, and I have ever brought up in discussion with her I let it just trigger the maelstrom. She would snap at me for something, and I would snap back. Just a lot of ugliness, I started working harder and longer hours just to avoid any possible confrontations.
As I mentioned, I have the power to crush her mind and spirit, I know what buttons to press to wreak all kinds of havoc. I could be a very vengeful bitch. Now, I may have come close to wanting to pursue that due to situations at the time, but I managed to refrain. Sometimes there's just no undoing what has been said or done.
So fast forward to last night. I wanted to make her happy, I wanted to make her feel good. I wasn't looking for any type of reciprocation, I just wanted to push all the right buttons this time, and fill her with ecstasy as I had done in past times. So I straddled her and was about to kiss her neck and she shuns my attempt. I can't recall what she said as it immediately triggered my defenses. I immediately just went to my side of the bed. She attempted to apologize, but I was not having it. Here I was trying to make her happy and she has to be a jerk about it.
As I lay there completely ignoring her, I came to a realization, that this is not who I really am. This is the monster I have become. So I surprisingly backed down, and opened the lines of communication. I expressed to her my intentions, I just wanted to give her what she wanted, love and affection, nothing more nothing less. I told her that now she knows my interest, I made the effort, now the ball is in her court to decide what to do. But now she needs to let me know what she wants because I wasn't going to get hurt again. So she put down her phone and spooned me. Oh my goodness, I don't know why, but I love being the little spoon. It is a feeling like no other. Comfort, security, love warmth, everything rolled up into one.
Below is a bit detailed, highlight it if you wish you read it.
So I straddled her again, and slowly kissed up her neck to her ear. I let her feel the warmth of my breath with each soft and gentle kiss. I could feel her writhe beneath me as I slowly approached her lips. I kissed her softly and gently, and then kissed her very passionately. I proceeded to kiss her neck, ears and lips, teasing her and feeling her enjoyment. Now I'm not going to lie to you, I was enjoying myself as well. I may have purposely been rubbing my chest against hers, enjoying the softness of my camisole rubbing my nipples. What? I couldn't resist. I then kissed up and down her body, teasing her more and more. I kissed her all over. I finally got to her chest, and I kissed all around her breast, I purposely avoided her nipples to increase her wanting desire. Finally I went in for the kill and I could hear her breath escape. I knew she was loving every minute of it. I went back to kissing her neck and lips, and she started to play with my nipples through my camisole, and she made me gasp in ecstasy. As this continued, she asked me if this is why I enjoyed wearing these, I just grinned and groaned a soft giggle. We finally settled down, and I laid back and she rested her head on my shoulder. Then she went for the kill and teased my nipples. Oh, I was in heaven. Okay, so yeah I would have loved the same treatment I gave her, but I wasn't about to complain. She played and teased both of my nipples, and I was in sheer ecstasy. I was loving every minute of it. When she was done, I went back and gave her what she enjoys, I kissed her deeply and passionately. Afterwards we laid back and she rested her head on my shoulder and reached between my legs to find I was wearing panties. She let out a low growl of disapproval. I told her not to start, I asked her to please not ruin the moment. She proceeded to rub between my legs and told me that I was probably going to have to change. Sure enough, my panties were very moist. I just laughed and said oh well. Before anyone asks, no, it did not lead to other things. Her monthly friend would soon be leaving, but could be messy. That's not really my thing, I have a very sensitive nose, and I am not particularly fond of that smell.
So fast forward to next day in the afternoon, I was modeling some new shirts for her and I made the comment that my chest appeared a bit taught, where everywhere else fit very nicely. She said yeah, the buttons seem to be pulling a bit. She also commented on my nipples sticking out. I almost half joked guess I was going to need to wear a bra, but instead went with pasties. She just said noooo. I took my shirt off and had on of course a camisole and I was showing her how it stretched across my chest. I started to rub my nipples and she covered her eyes in disapproval. I told her that my nipples didn't seem to bother her last night. And she responded with another snide comment. I didn't let it show that it bothered me. So I don't know, to me feels like a one step forward two steps back kind of situation. Just when I think there is progress, it turns out, not really. I’ll bring it up again what I would like, but I fear it will fall of deaf ears. Sometimes I wonder how we have lasted so long. They say opposites attract, and while that may be the case, it is an awful pain in the you know what! Wait, this post originally started out positive, not sure how it changed in the end. Oh well cest la vie.