[Stevenator.]

Never stick your dick in crazy.

[GamerGurl]

Time is only making this tougher. I can barely find time to come here and post; I had to wait until she was asleep. I feel trapped... I can't leave my house to look for work, which is the first step of escape. My own mother is throwing the whole "you got yourself in this mess, you can get yourself out" garbage. I'm also afraid of what she may do if I leave. This is all causing my depression to worsen and I don't know what to do. Nobody cares because apparently having a penis is supposed to make jobs and home ownership fall from the fucking sky. 

#muhmaleprivilege

[lilmikey]

GG,
I've been following this and hoping the best for you. I have ask, what would happen if you simply told her that you had lined up a few job interviews and that you would be back when they were done? Would she forbid you and physically restrain you? Would she destroy all your possessions when you were gone? I realize that there is no way I could know what you are going thru, but if it's that extreme, you have to take action. You said it yourself, the first step is to get a job. Make that your main goal. It may not be easy, but it is attainable. One step at a time. Hang in there and good luck. You do have people rooting for you.

[Dianna1395]

Time is only making this tougher. I can barely find time to come here and post; I had to wait until she was asleep. I feel trapped... I can't leave my house to look for work, which is the first step of escape. My own mother is throwing the whole "you got yourself in this mess, you can get yourself out" garbage. I'm also afraid of what she may do if I leave. This is all causing my depression to worsen and I don't know what to do. Nobody cares because apparently having a penis is supposed to make jobs and home ownership fall from the fucking sky. 

#muhmaleprivilege

Gamer,
I very much sympathize.
When dating a nurse, she pointed out the difference between empathise and sympathize. IIRC, empathise kept you removed, at a higher level, than the person you're talking with. Sympathize is on the same level.
I do mean sympathize.

As to "never stick your dick in crazy," they all look normal. The .Learn world let's them get away with being bitchy children. Look at "fearless girl" staring g down the Bull of WW2 American economy...  Aka, petulant child who thinks she knows how everything works....   But you KNOW the moment real work is needed, "I'm just a girl," is all you hear, "won't some big strong man do it for me...?". And plenty of thirsty guys will. There are more of those now than ever before, and there is less community and less discipline from the (un)fairer sex... 
Can't tell a woman anything, least of all that she's mistreating a man. He should just, "man up," and get back to providing for her...

Thanks for the help there.... "True Transsexual" cred established, it's always the man's fault.

Moving on, I don't have a lot more I can offer, Gamer, except that you'll need to be a dick about things, and not care. Ignore her wishes, find time to get out, and look into loans maybe. You might but be able to play on the BS that's going around, your "gender identity" (google the male competing in women's weightlifting, and there the trans MAMA fighter who is competing as a woman, and there are the bathroom events, and...  Hence the quotes. No slur intended.) might be enough to force a shelter to offer some help.

Meantime maybe we can get some additional support here.
Kickstarter or GoFundMe?
What were the ages for your children?
Any medications she takes, any way to drug her a bit? Not talking something she isn't already on.

Meantime, what is your resume like? Got a means to generate income? Can you do something like write a book or use an affiliate at Amazon or make a blog...?
I know you had posted this elsewhere, but I can't recall the answers.

Crossing state lines is a good idea as well. I wish I could tell you where to go, who to contact, but sad truth is since you're male, many places take you to be the "primary aggressor" even if you've been attacked with a weapon and have been wounded. Better to find a way to disappear. That we may that be able to help with, but it means clearing out a lot of data...  Access us from an AWS image, and purge data on your computer and the router, so this forum and all your normal pages are harder to find. Scan the computer for Trojans and keyloggers. Maybe even run a Linux live disk, so there's no longer anything on your computer?

Based on the answers there, and the legal risks (e.g., your children might be a real problem, you could perhaps be seen as kidnapping them...), we can help you a bit, maybe.

-Dianna

[GamerGurl]

Scouring my PC I found a keylogger, She apparently installed a google chrome app called "gumshoe" to record all my usernames and passwords to every site I sign in at. I removed it, wiped the database it created, and I will start using another browser immediately. I've also had a password to unlock my phone since forever, and she has a fit about it daily. No I am NOT exaggerating.

As for any medications she is on.... She's not, but she needs to be.

She likes to tell me now and then about things she has broken/stolen from her exes when they left her as a subtle threat. I'm not going to let my PC get destroyed a second time, I simply can't handle it.

I have a 7 year old son and a 4 year old daughter. As of yet I only get to see them on weekends until I am more financially stable. And yes, crossing state lines would be an awful idea. If I take my kids, it's kidnapping. If I don't, it's abandonment.



Getting fucked from all directions is supposed to be fun, not at all like this

[Dianna1395]

Scouring my PC I found a keylogger, She apparently installed a google chrome app called "gumshoe" to record all my usernames and passwords to every site I sign in at. I removed it, wiped the database it created, and I will start using another browser immediately. I've also had a password to unlock my phone since forever, and she has a fit about it daily. No I am NOT exaggerating.

As for any medications she is on.... She's not, but she needs to be.

She likes to tell me now and then about things she has broken/stolen from her exes when they left her as a subtle threat. I'm not going to let my PC get destroyed a second time, I simply can't handle it.

I have a 7 year old son and a 4 year old daughter. As of yet I only get to see them on weekends until I am more financially stable. And yes, crossing state lines would be an awful idea. If I take my kids, it's kidnapping. If I don't, it's abandonment.



Getting fucked from all directions is supposed to be fun, not at all like this

Gamer,
Run Linux from the DVD drive, disk only.
It can't capture anything from a different OS running only in RAM.

Your children aren't living with you. Can you afford a few webcams, or perhaps an app for the cell phone to allow you to record conversations? Might be of value.
Other options (illegal) are available. Putting drugs in her car, for example, and calling the police...

If she's dangerous, that might be very useful. Establish legal reasons for restraining order, establish evidence of crazy - check state laws, mind, in MassiveTwoShits, for example, you can go to prison for not having her explicit consent to being recorded (two party consent state, only the police are exempt under "implied consent" laws. Essentially, they can arrest you for recording them in public, even while they are recording you....  It won't last in court, but there's a LOT of lunacy that is ruled into law by dishonorable judges.)

I don't know that the PC is worth concern, honestly.  Take the drive, the rest can be recovered. There will be new PCs next year, you know? Unless it's a hacking rig, in which case, we know "nozzing."  ;-)  

If the ex is willing to work with you, there may not be issues crossing state lines, as long as she knows the "why." Is she cooperative?

I'd use Firefox or Opera, BTW, or even just use an Amazon server. No way for her to track much then. Combined with a DVD-only system, it's pretty safe. Might need to use a VM, depending on how aggressive she is, so you run from within the bugged version, with the bug unable to see...

Might want to take that offline, tough.

-Dianna

[Billie]

She is a danger to herself and others. Not taking psych meds or being undiagnosed qualifies her for 5150 a 3 day hold in the psych ward.  Either take her to the hospital and sign her in.  Or have the police check her in.  

Other than that make her go to a Psyciatrist.  

My wife never went to a psychologist and I made her go and get diagnosed.

[lilmikey]

GG,
If your kids aren't living with you, man up and do what you need to do. I know this sounds harsh, but stop being such a pussy, you can embrace your girlie side after the hard work is done. It's weird, but a man's work is required here.

[Dianna1395]

GG,
If your kids aren't living with you, man up and do what you need to do. I know this sounds harsh, but stop being such a pussy, you can embrace your girlie side after the hard work is done. It's weird, but a man's work is required here.

While this makes things difficult, GG, I have to agree.
The worst risks are fairly minimal. Your children should be safe, and an S3 image keeps your data preserved in the cloud. Physical computers can be replaced, and an S3 or AWS server can probably do much more than your desktop.

Something I've noticed about those who transition, especially transitioning young - though their energy is feminine, their mind is "masculine" in a sense. They have a goal, they get their shit straight, an they do what needs to be done to accomplish it. The best story was from an older TS, who was talking to a young woman in the doctor's office - who she found out was also a TS. As they were talking, the older woman was smiling to herself, thinking how funny this was - the young woman had "NO IDEA" how much work was ahead of her, especially since she wasn't particularly supported at home. She was talking about job, finances, long-term goals, and the older woman was thinking how much she had to learn as she transitioned...
Then the nurse called the young woman's MALE name - and threw the older woman for a complete loop!
She had assumed the feminine creature she was talking to was FTM...  NO! She was MTF, and had actually passed quite completely. She had everything planned out, and the five years or so of hard work? Already mostly done, with financial freedom in sight, and her OWN life to live.

The point is, it is possible to be feminine and yet retain the task-oriented, masculine, "Get it done!" attitude.

YOU and YOUR TIME are NOT replaceable. Based on BillyBoy's note, if she's supposed to be taking meds and isn't, and you can document the risk, you have an easy out. You just leave no forwarding address while she's confined, and GTFO (Get The F Out.)
You have friends in the area? Or can hire movers and a U-Haul? Separate accounts? The problem then is finding a cheap place to live. Craig's list might help, or someone looking for a roommate. Worst case, you can be "obstinate" about something like your phone unlock, and film her losing her mind - then go to the court and show the risk.

Better if you can engineer it in public. Have witnesses.

Failing that, turning her in for illegal drugs works, too. It does require more investment, though.

Take it from someone who has been surviving similar for 10 years. I've finally got things lined up myself, and even though we're better than we've been before, I'm tired of dealing with the crazy, I need to get out now that I've got the financial wherewithal, and hopefully will be set just when the lease is up - so she goes to work, and I disappear.
I've told her I'm done. This woman (not worthy of that term) has done the same things you've mentioned: hack email, track my history, read my phone messages, read my emails, prevent me from calling and talking to family, she's directly responsible for ruining my relationship with my family, and she's beyond intrusive, so I never get a moment's peace. Even sitting on the john is a public event. No boundaries, she's the Apex Alpha Bitch, and monopolizes (more in the past) everything.
I've been trying to figure out if it's time to wind my ass or scratch my watch, you know?
And I'll never get that time back, nor can I just "lose" the mental damage.
My inheritance, my own finances, gone; my father died estranged from me; sister won't talk to me.

Move on, for your own safety and sanity.
Man up, put on your big girl panties, and then plan - all in your head. Establish a timeframe for events, ensure they'll happen, rally friends, and GTFO.

-Dianna

[GamerGurl]

Im glad you have that strength to go on with your life so easily. I've been through so much that it makes a person want to just throw in the whole towel rack and the wall it's stuck to. I appreciate what advice you're giving me, and the time you are taking to give it. But everyone is different and can handle different situations in different ways, or the inability to. What I need more than anything is a paying job so I have the financial ability to get out of the situation. Unfortunately she is not going to let that happen. My meager tax return is gone now too, by her doing. But now my ex has told me that once I get a job she is going to railroad me for all the child support she can despite her having sufficent income already. Fucked if I do, fucked if I don't. Thoughts of just ending it all are coming back to me again. I don't know what to do any more. All my known options end in despair. I try to think of my kids when I get thoughts of suicide but the government believes that money makes a good parent. Why does everything in existence have to depend on this shit. All my problems are multiplied by MONEY.