:UPDATED:
Oki, I have no words to describe how beautiful you have become. You are Astonishing. I see your Breasts and Feminine Figure, and I am just left in awe. There is just no way for my brain to process it all. It's a womanly body for sure, that makes me wonder how you ever could be comfortable in 'male' clothes ever again... much less i wonder how your jeans/bottoms fit...
Gosh, i know all too well the effects of estrogen from any source, on the body. so i know if you have that much growth up top. Feminisation of everything else must have followed suite. (Usually you dont even notice it!)
HRT: I suggest a Endocrinologist and Therapist. Most therapist given your level of development, wouldnt even blink twice at writing that letter for recommendation.
HOWEVER, if you cannot wait, or if thats not possible, i highly Suggest a Informed Consent Model, Clinic. While the treatment is less targeted at your needs and more targeted at the general guidelines(outlines). Its better to be under a doctors care, than self-medicating in the first place... We can be our best doctors, but if something goes wrong we have to pay the bill... its not pretty.
Clothes shopping: I find it good to take a look at what my peers, female and trans alike are wearing. the picture myself in them, if I can't visualise it then I go try them on. you need to feel that confidence you have deep inside and bring it to the surface. you have it, its in your figure and your smile. Dont be afraid of who you are, be proud of it. OWN IT. Own your skin, Heart and Mind, and follow those desires into the fabric oasis. - I'd go shopping with you if we were close, I love helping others and it helps keep me confident when im shopping...
Hair: you are so lucky, i cant do laser/electrolysis yet. $$$ is my limiting factor.
Nails: Dont just tease us with them, let us see it. We all love the way your looking, be proud of your nails
Family: Dont feel at all bad, we have all been in your position when going the transition route. its why alot leave places like this. i wont though, i see the valuable asset i can be to others. I imagine your family sees the same thing we do, show them how it makes you happy. They wont question it
- Gosh i know i was sweating bullets the first time i showed up to there doorstep in a pair of leggings, a cute top and runners. They smiled after the initial shock, they realised, my real happiness, is coming out, so there is no reason to question or stop me.
Friends/groups: I'm working on this myself, it seems so hard to find others. people that can understand and relate. I cant find a support group here, and i doubt i ever really will. but it wont stop me from trying!
Partners/Guys: Ughh dont get me started on the dating life... been there already, albeit i deal with the drama of being hit on and not wanting to even be noticed... but dealing with a partner is alot of woes that we all go through. Remember, as long as you 'appear' as presenting male, men will see you that way. Even if they dont really trust your expression, because it doesnt feel earnest or complete. I find it much easier when desiring a male partner to come at it from both a sexual side and romantic. Apply to there interest, but play slightly hard to get. Once they are hooked, its rather rare for them to feel disgust when they put so much effort into 'catching' you. Men are usually predatory and aggressive, but not always the case. Remember to feel a persons personality to better understand who they are before going into anything further. - I suggest the typical date/dinner type to start with, feel them out by letting them know you support Transgender rights. You have friends and family members that are. Keywords will key you into theyre real emotions on the matters that affect us...
MOST Importantly! Remain safe at all times, while being with a partner, whether presenting as male or female, it comes with alot of risks...
Quite a few Gay men, Will not date Transgender women out of principal. We are not desirable, because we are women, regardless of sexual orientation, Sexual Organs and Physical Appearance.
Quite a few Straight men, Will not date Transgender women out of fear. While this is not always the case, you can often get them to move past that fear and have meaningful, romantic relationships. Its often either Sex or Nothing, keep this in mind.
Do what CIS women do, Feel the person out for compatibilities with well placed conversation, light flirting and playing hard to get. the idea being to judge there character and affinity to a potential relationship. Not to push them away or to assume anything. Remember, They WANT you, or the situation wouldnt of occured. Confidence is your Ally.
Word of Warning: Alot of us, get into the trappings of a relationship and forget we are in transition. we put important things to the back burner and get our selves into a situation.
Whether your plans are years off or months/days into the future. Always put your real happiness first, not momentary pleasure. Because its easy to be happy for a moment, its hard to be happy for a lifetime.
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I wanted to also say, while bigger city's come with more options, there is typically a higher risk too. its a 50/50 coin. Be safe and dont travel Alone.