(17-01-2019, 10:03 AM)Shirazmn Wrote: It's just fair that I start this off:
I am a 40 years old white guy from London. I am happily married and we have a 2 years old boy. Although I have been crossdressing since I can remember, my wife knows, I would describe myself as the average cisgender manly man. I enjoy my role as father and breadwinner, my monthly night out with friends and colleagues at the pub getting drunk, and my quite active social life which includes taking my son to swim, going to the seaside, poolside parties with my office etc...
I have always had a thing for "senses and feeling". I love to feel light fabrics, the height of high heels, and since my nipples have always been very sensitive, I wanted to feel what it's like to have breasts behind them (and maybe fill my bras when I crossdress).
I am reaching now a point, after 2 1/2 years toying with PM, where the shape of my chest is showing through my man's t-shirt. I "have boobs", even if noone would call them as such because their shape is not very round and they can pass for chubby moobs. But I think that I am reaching a point when my "moobs" will be too big for how chubby I am. On one side this makes me happy, or I wouldn't be doing NBE, on another side I am scared that my wife, who knows nothing of NBE, will question me. I am planning at least 3 seaside holidays for 2019 and, obviously, that could be a problem too with family and friends.
I am in a bit of a pink fog, I guess. I know I should stop but I keep going back at it. I even bought a number of bras with the intention of start wearing them in my everyday life. I had this thing before, about somehow taking my CD fetish into my normal life, but the appeal is getting stronger now that I would have something to fill the bras with.
I started wearing more when at home, under my t-shirts and jumpers. As I said, my wife doesn't care. But she'd be pissed if she found out about NBE (we somehow jokedjabout the subject of me growing boobs and she didn't like it at all), and what are the chances that precisely a crossdresser is "so unlucky" to spark a massive case of gynecomastia all of a sudden? I wear bras (under 2 layers) even when our kid is around, and since he's young, I hug him continuously and I am sure that he can feel the straps and the cups of the bras. I tell myself that he won't remember, so he won't care. Hopefully.
So far there has never been a problem. Nipple play is a huge part of our lovemaking, so she plays a lot with my breasts without ever raising the subject of them being larger or heavier. She noticed that they are softer (the skin), but she didn't think much of it because I usually shave and moisturize my body anyway.
So, here I am. I guess that I will soon have to take a break but at the same time PM seems addictive and I always want to push ahead a bit more. Until a few months ago I was swimming in my 38C bras but now my "underboob" rests against the bottom of the cup. Something is changing and it's thrilling and scary.
Shirazmn,
I'm really disappointed that this thread didn't get more traction, because I would really like to hear the stories from a lot of guys, especially on the topics of how they started on this journey, and what they have said to their wives, and what stage they are at and how their lives are now.
For my part, I'm a 68-year-old white male from Texas. I've been married for almost 10 years to my fourth wife, but I wouldn't describe it as happy. I've had some latent crossdressing desires for a long time, but they never really surfaced much until about a year ago, when I got a "brain fart" and just went after it in a big way, Within a week, I was going shopping at the thrift stores dressed in skirt, blouse, panties, and bra stuffed with a 36DD breast form. But in the year since, I've gone through 3 complete purges, and had some very difficult conversations with my wife, who does NOT accept it all. The conclusion of the discussion was that if I pushed it or persisted in it, it would be "the death of our marriage."
I knew that it was possible for men to take hormones and develop some breasts. I had read that, while everyone is different, typically, you would top out at about a small B cup. If I was going to develop breasts, I wanted them bigger than that, because I like big breasts! But I also didn't want to do anything overt to cause them. In another thread, I mentioned an article I stumbled across about a middle-aged guy who grew 38DDD boobs as a result of prescription meds, and I was jealous!
And then I stumbled on this site, and I've been pouring over it every chance I get and trying to absorb everything I can. I stumbled onto the thread "Binaural Beats" in the Personal Programs section, and, while skeptical, I thought, well, I can give that try and just see what it does, and that's not really doing anything "overt". If it does work, and the wife asks where those boobs came from, I can say I don't know!
But as has been mentioned on here many times, the whole process of growing boobs has a strong tendency to be addictive. So I'm not sure I'll be able to leave it there!
At the same time, I'm not 100% convinced I want to go there, even if the wife was not a consideration. Am I going to go a year or two down this road, develop a pair that can't be hidden, and then decide I really don't want them? Getting rid of a pair of boobs is not like throwing out a few hundred dollars worth of crossdressing clothes! It's scary!
I'd love to hear from others where they are on this road.