[Heaven's Night]

Happy to hear your mum's reaction but is no surprise as mums are a bit like that. Also it's very strange how people can develop an extreme fear of losing somebody who will never, never abandon them. I sort of pick up that feeling that you are that sort of person too. Hope I'm not wrong but I am arrogantly absolutely sure you are one of those who will not emotionally hurt or let's say..abandon a person who needs us.
I cannot answer how to fix that issue, it's something I have gone through myself and perplexed me and have no answer to. And no! you don't need to take pics with a tape because those things and the charts are lying bastards, according to statistics I'm supposed to be a D cup, all of my bras are a B and I can barely, almost just about fill them. So you see this is how I got a bit curious, and probably offensive which made me decide at that time to leave this place for ever. But I believe you, if your bras fit and am sure they do then that's you. Bras and sizes are a bit dodgy. All of my bras are 70b or 32b I think in imperial? Some look a bit creased or baggy as I'm not quite filling it, others look like im about to burst out of them am stretching it so much, even though they are all the same size. Dont worry about it too much, boob size is a bit of a bitch, finding a bra that fit's ..well kinda difficult.

Yea, well, what ever doubts she may have, those will dissolve with time when she sees that I will persist. You are correct, I have no problem of letting people go... Even close ones, even those I love, if its necessary or they insist, I let them go and I have no problem also moving forward when someone isn't worth my time and energy. Some may think its selfish or emotionally cold, but I don't see it like that.

Hahaha, yea, bra sizes and measurements are quite a load of crap when compared to others. I use it to gauge my progress and find educated guesses on which clothes to fit in and so far I've been quite correct with it. My new bras should arrive in day or two and that's one more moment of truth if my gamble was a good one or not. I think the problems stems from firstly, people being obsessed about size, and secondly for many thinking that bra size = boob size. Both are bunch a hooey. For me the best fitting bras start from a euro size D cup, the current fave being 90 E or 40 DD, its starting to fit better each day, but it still has some loose space to fill on top of the cups. I picked a one with big cups on purpose as smaller cups seem to never be wide enough for me. The problem is that those which are wide enough are often too deep as they're designed for more projection like born that way ladies often have. Its a total gamble on what fits. And then there's the sister sizes too... A cup can be an E cup which is a nice mind bend on the already ridiculous labyrinth of bra sizing. Its a pain in the ass...

What I find most useful and important about the measurements is the ratios and keeping eye out for changes. You've must have seen some screenshots of the spreadsheet I'm making? The most important numbers I think are the bust to band ratio, more specifically the rolling weekly average I calculated as that takes the natural fluctuation out from twisting the numbers and gives an easy to read idea on the development, the numbers themselves are more or less irrelevant, just their relativity is. Then ofc, the other numbers give me up to date idea on which bras to get next be the aim a perfect fit or a goal bra.

Speaking of numbers, I just measured a new record, bust right now is at 47".

[Drew]

Happy to hear your mum's reaction but is no surprise as mums are a bit like that. Also it's very strange how people can develop an extreme fear of losing somebody who will never, never abandon them. I sort of pick up that feeling that you are that sort of person too. Hope I'm not wrong but I am arrogantly absolutely sure you are one of those who will not emotionally hurt or let's say..abandon a person who needs us.
I cannot answer how to fix that issue, it's something I have gone through myself and perplexed me and have no answer to. And no! you don't need to take pics with a tape because those things and the charts are lying bastards, according to statistics I'm supposed to be a D cup, all of my bras are a B and I can barely, almost just about fill them. So you see this is how I got a bit curious, and probably offensive which made me decide at that time to leave this place for ever. But I believe you, if your bras fit and am sure they do then that's you. Bras and sizes are a bit dodgy. All of my bras are 70b or 32b I think in imperial? Some look a bit creased or baggy as I'm not quite filling it, others look like im about to burst out of them am stretching it so much, even though they are all the same size. Dont worry about it too much, boob size is a bit of a bitch, finding a bra that fit's ..well kinda difficult.

Yea, well, what ever doubts she may have, those will dissolve with time when she sees that I will persist. You are correct, I have no problem of letting people go... Even close ones, even those I love, if its necessary or they insist, I let them go and I have no problem also moving forward when someone isn't worth my time and energy. Some may think its selfish or emotionally cold, but I don't see it like that.

Hahaha, yea, bra sizes and measurements are quite a load of crap when compared to others. I use it to gauge my progress and find educated guesses on which clothes to fit in and so far I've been quite correct with it. My new bras should arrive in day or two and that's one more moment of truth if my gamble was a good one or not. I think the problems stems from firstly, people being obsessed about size, and secondly for many thinking that bra size = boob size. Both are bunch a hooey. For me the best fitting bras start from a euro size D cup, the current fave being 90 E or 40 DD, its starting to fit better each day, but it still has some loose space to fill on top of the cups. I picked a one with big cups on purpose as smaller cups seem to never be wide enough for me. The problem is that those which are wide enough are often too deep as they're designed for more projection like born that way ladies often have. Its a total gamble on what fits. And then there's the sister sizes too... A cup can be an E cup which is a nice mind bend on the already ridiculous labyrinth of bra sizing. Its a pain in the ass...

What I find most useful and important about the measurements is the ratios and keeping eye out for changes. You've must have seen some screenshots of the spreadsheet I'm making? The most important numbers I think are the bust to band ratio, more specifically the rolling weekly average I calculated as that takes the natural fluctuation out from twisting the numbers and gives an easy to read idea on the development, the numbers themselves are more or less irrelevant, just their relativity is. Then ofc, the other numbers give me up to date idea on which bras to get next be the aim a perfect fit or a goal bra.

Speaking of numbers, I just measured a new record, bust right now is at 47".

47"! Alright I will never, never achieve that proportion, can probaby tell that from me revealing my own bra size which is a bit sorta tiny. God if mine got that big I would be flashing them to everybody. Just one thing about bra sizing DiDi. I have problems with this and have noticed I have quite a substantial amount of side boob if that's what you can call it???? I'm freikishly thin but on some bras have a problem getting all of my boob in there, the side's won't fit in there so are sort of squashed toward the armpit outside of the bra which makes me look a bit fat even though I'm actually underweight. Am I the only one here with that problem? The reason i havent posted a pic of my progress for quite a long time. Now hoping you will write no Drew I cannot cram all of my boob into a bra either there is a bit of overflow that just won't fit in there, just to make me feel sorta normal. Just reading the last post you also seem to have a bit of difficulty on the bra scene, it really is rocket science.

[Drew]

OMG! Just read something I overlooked on your thread honey, talking about your mum.
We cannot expect instant acceptance even though that is what we desire. Your mum will come around I'm sure of it, unconditional love is a prerequisite for being a mum and so yeah give her time to absorb what has been revealed to her. BTW I loved your brothers reaction to the news 'do you have tits?' made me instantly like the guy

[Heaven's Night]

47"! Alright I will never, never achieve that proportion, can probaby tell that from me revealing my own bra size which is a bit sorta tiny. God if mine got that big I would be flashing them to everybody. Just one thing about bra sizing DiDi. I have problems with this and have noticed I have quite a substantial amount of side boob if that's what you can call it???? I'm freikishly thin but on some bras have a problem getting all of my boob in there, the side's won't fit in there so are sort of squashed toward the armpit outside of the bra which makes me look a bit fat even though I'm actually underweight. Am I the only one here with that problem? The reason i havent posted a pic of my progress for quite a long time. Now hoping you will write no Drew I cannot cram all of my boob into a bra either there is a bit of overflow that just won't fit in there, just to make me feel sorta normal. Just reading the last post you also seem to have a bit of difficulty on the bra scene, it really is rocket science.

OMG! Just read something I overlooked on your thread honey, talking about your mum.

We cannot expect instant acceptance even though that is what we desire. Your mum will come around I'm sure of it, unconditional love is a prerequisite for being a mum and so yeah give her time to absorb what has been revealed to her. BTW I loved your brothers reaction to the news 'do you have tits?' made me instantly like the guy

Good morning. ^_^

46,9" bust, 36,8" band just minutes ago. Funny how the fluctuation works. Yea, I love to show mine around. I wish I had smaller frame... I've said this million times, to actually look decently busty, I need boobs which on someone else would look like cow udders. xD

Yea, sideboob, I got that too, but not over the top bad. First find a bra with wide enough cups, try to get some sister size, one with shorter band and larger cups... Then when you put it on, bend over and pull all that 'sideboob' in, there's several steps to this, I saw a really cool instructional video on Freya's thread a while ago, some Japanese video. Since then, I've always did this when I put my bra on, pull all the stuff from the side in there, would work better with tighter band actually. I hope my new bras will fit well.


My mom took it surprisingly well. Tbh, I expected much much worse. So I can't really complain. I knew there would be some nagging about something from her, likely behind my back just like she did, but that's nothing compared to problems that could have come out of it... Hahahah, my brother, he's so cool. I had forgot about that part of the phone call. He's just awesome... I miss him.

[Heaven's Night]

Ok, I'm out to all important people by now. Just called my dad, he took it quite relaxed and without problems. Doesn't understand a bit about it, but he's fine with it.  

I'll pot today's numbers here. Making it to new record highs... My bust measured 47,2" today and band 36,6". Ratio rolling average reached 10" for the first time. Its going so crazily well. I couldn't be happier about this. But the last week or so, I've experienced that weird ill feeling I seem to get when ever I'm on pm for more than a month without a break. So now I will drop the dose again for some time. I can likely drop it anyway at this stage as reishi is working its magic and E cream is just purely magical. My nipples have grown a lot and I think its having a big time effect on over all breast growth.

It still amazes me how well my body reacts to the herbs. It looks likely that I have to stay on herbs for a long while before I have the chance to get on HRT. The Finnish system is awfully outdated and slow with long waiting lists on everything. I have been thinking of my options which aren't many... Continue herbs + wait for ages to get on hrt seems most likely. Another is to get hrt from a private doctor which would mean huge expenses. And then there's illegal under the counter meds.

So NBE is the likely path for maybe over a year still.

Anyway, take a look at the spreadsheet... Looks very promising.

[Heaven's Night]

Just a quick progress update. I'm on the day 49 of the current program and the growth hasn't shown signs of stalling, the averages keep on climbing, no idea how long this will go on before it slows down. I've been refraining from posting much pictures as next time I do, I want there to be visible change... Lately everything has felt pretty much unchanged but the numbers show otherwise. All signs of growth are there, soreness hasn't been that crazy for a while now. Too bad as I really love it.

Anyway, here's what the spreadsheet looks like today. Around day 60 I'll do a two month update with pictures. Finally the bust measurement is visibly growing, seems like the loss of band length has stopped for now, just fluctuating as usual. Evening measurements are always way bigger btw, these are all taken in the morning soon after I woke up. Evenings always show more on both.

[Happyme]

Just a quick progress update. I'm on the day 49 of the current program and the growth hasn't shown signs of stalling, the averages keep on climbing, no idea how long this will go on before it slows down. I've been refraining from posting much pictures as next time I do, I want there to be visible change... Lately everything has felt pretty much unchanged but the numbers show otherwise. All signs of growth are there, soreness hasn't been that crazy for a while now. Too bad as I really love it.

Anyway, here's what the spreadsheet looks like today. Around day 60 I'll do a two month update with pictures. Finally the bust measurement is visibly growing, seems like the loss of band length has stopped for now, just fluctuating as usual. Evening measurements are always way bigger btw, these are all taken in the morning soon after I woke up. Evenings always show more on both.

Truly amazing!
So many girls struggle to gain an inch, but you have taken off running and show no signs of quitting.
I'll be ,not so patiently, for the next Didi show.
Woo Hoo.
Bobbi

[Heaven's Night]

I'm one day shy of making the two month update being on 'Lotus program', I got to say its been nothing short of amazing. I might make more detailed post tomorrow. Perhaps make some comparison pictures or something like that... Write more in depth about how it has been and what's coming.

But I make no promises, I was supposed to have last day at work yesterday but since my boss in an asshole, I still have to go today and tomorrow morning so I might be too tired to stay online. In that case, bear with me, I'm just taking my time.

Everyone likes pictures so I'll leave these here. I'm off to bed now.

[Heaven's Night]

So... Latest changes to the program include 5/2 day cycle, meaning that on weekends, I have lowered PM intake to 1000mg, should probably lower it to 500mg, but it seems if I take days completely off, my emotional state goes totally bonkers. Also no E cream on weekends and Progestrone cream twice a day.

For the last week I've applied PG daily, about 1/2 teaspoon per day. Its still early to tell if this will make a change, but since starting PG I have had quite nice growth. My boobs are way rounder and fuller than before. I tested applying E cream twice to three times a day instead of once, can't tell what difference it did, but it seems when I do this, there's more puffiness in the mornings and the growth pains keep on going.

I still haven't went permanently down to 1500mg/day with PM which I think I'll soon do, I've kept it on 2000mg for quite long since it seems that my body requires that dosage to be effective. I will test this out soon and see if I can still go lower.

MSM I've added up to 2,5 teaspoons a day, taken in one go in the evening, mixed with water. Halved vitamin D intake due to increased sunlight and spending a lot of time outdoors.

The measurement spreadsheet looks like this now. First picture shows bust + bust/band ratio change from the last few weeks and the second pic is the whole thing zoomed out. My band has shrunk to around 36,6" and stayed there, bust has started growing and the last two days I've measured over 48" for the first time. Likely fluctuation there, but if the signs hold, soon it will become the norm. This is what I predicted to happen some time ago. I'm wishing to lose some more weight to get my band down to 36". The measurements are done in the way for having an idea about which bra's to pick, meaning that band is measured tight on the lowest point of exhale, it gives the shortest band length possible. Most fitting band appears to be 38" which is a nice fit but not too tight, 36" is really really snug fit while 40" is getting too loose. Bust measured from the thickest point on the highest point of inhale, giving largest measurement. Again the point is not to inflate the numbers, but to know the bra size. What I think is important is the ratio of the two and the rolling weekly average. This stood still for bit over a week and now its growing again. I was afraid of being stalled for a while, but was wrong which I'm really happy about. I think I'm steadily in late tanner stage 3 at the moment all things considered. I think adding to the PG dosage is a good idea at this time, we will see this in the next few months.

I've put up some new goal posts, first slim down enough to get 36" band length, get my bust grow up to 50", seems like I'm soon 2" away from that so I don't think its unrealistic at all. I want to completely fill up the 40 DD bra which also isn't that far away. Its getting more and more comfy each day. Right now the 36 E bra with a short band extension is really snug fit and feels wonderful to wear, its the black pushup bra on the picture in the above post. I'm quite certain that I need to buy some new ones before the summer is over.

I'm thinking of taking some pics with the measure tape and make some sort of time line comparison since the time I started to this day, that could be fun to make and demonstrate nicely what can be done.

All in all it seems like this program is the way to go with herbs, at least for me its been super effective in a very short time. I'm grateful Lotus reached out to me and we started talking, she has been very helpful and super nice with me. Her advice has been worth more than I can describe. Oh and I should add that so far I haven't had any heath issues from this program, excluding the obvious effects on my sex drive and function which doesn't bother me at all. Next step will be HRT, but that will very likely take a long time and I get to keep on going with herbs for another year, take or leave some months I guess.

[Happyme]

Thanks for the update Didi!
and the pic too!!
Very nice progress, Your the NBE poster girl for sure!!
and thanks for your hard work on documenting your progress. It will be very valuable
Bobbi