Hello,
I'm a 44yr old male (or so I thought), living in California. My wife has an adult kid, but we have no kids together. I've taken PM off and on over the years, with first time being around 2015. I ran into this board when looking for the now closed board that I had last browsed when getting info on PM and other herbal growth options.
I've been crossdressing in private very extensively for years, since my preteen years. with the occasional sneak outside dressed en femme late at night around my condo/house as an adult (usually just to get the mail). After my breast growth experiment using estradiol patches for 5-6 months in 2010, I came to the conclusion that I was possibly transfemme, but had no intention to pursue it - which suited my wife. She Because even if I was, I felt that it just wasn't realistic with my large frame (6'5", 280 lbs now) to ever be able to pass, and shoes would be very hard to find (i normally wear a size 14 us mens, 15 us womens usually fits tolerably well - but options are few and far between). I had breasts, though relatively small A cup at best, but I found them soooo much more pleasurable than breastforms. and soon tossed mine out. Unfortunately, a lot of the development within the arreolas and nipples went away with time, so they became much less sensitive. I've been able to hide them as moobs to this point. But I've always wanted to grow them larger, or at least re-activate my existing breast tissue to its former glory.
I still have some ainterol PM capsules from when I last went on it, but had stopped after just 2-3 months, after my wife realized I was taking it with my nipples standing out more again. She scolded me that with any more growth that I wouldn't be able to hide them anymore and would need to start wearing a bra - which I wasn't ready for yet, so I stopped.
I just started on PM again last Monday, and almost immediately I found my femme self coming strongly to the forefront. So the PM couldn't really have been doing anything so quickly (single 500mg pill first day, then 1000 daily since. Bumped to 1500mg today, spread throughout the day. My head has been like a freaking whirlwind this whole week. But basically I've been doing too much online fem shopping, shaved/epilated my chest and legs on Tues/ Wed. I actually epilated my very furry arms and hands on Saturday, which I hadn't done since 2011. And today I got my eyebrows threaded, and asked for them to be done to look more feminine. I've gotten my brows threaded before, but never actually dared to ask for them to be fem-appearing. And oh yeah, I skipped that I think I had my "egg" moment on Wed/Thurs, and concluded that I quite possibly am in fact Trans, and probably need to something about it - and in my mind accepted that it might even include transitioning (Brienne of Tarth's larger, older sister anyone?) So I'm finally pursuing gender counseling to try to figure out exactly what my deal is. I kinda feel now that if I were closer to normal female size, that I might have pursued transition back in 2010, while 31 instead. And the "magic button" scenario, to become a genetic girl I would have pushed it in a heartbeat.
I've been doing LOTS of soul-searching this week, been researching LOTS as well. And today I think I finally found my femme name.
I plan to post a few things, including photos of my progress. But this post is already too long - Sorry.
A week ago I never thought I would post on here, but sometimes a LOT can happen in a week.
Jessica 
I'm a 44yr old male (or so I thought), living in California. My wife has an adult kid, but we have no kids together. I've taken PM off and on over the years, with first time being around 2015. I ran into this board when looking for the now closed board that I had last browsed when getting info on PM and other herbal growth options.
I've been crossdressing in private very extensively for years, since my preteen years. with the occasional sneak outside dressed en femme late at night around my condo/house as an adult (usually just to get the mail). After my breast growth experiment using estradiol patches for 5-6 months in 2010, I came to the conclusion that I was possibly transfemme, but had no intention to pursue it - which suited my wife. She Because even if I was, I felt that it just wasn't realistic with my large frame (6'5", 280 lbs now) to ever be able to pass, and shoes would be very hard to find (i normally wear a size 14 us mens, 15 us womens usually fits tolerably well - but options are few and far between). I had breasts, though relatively small A cup at best, but I found them soooo much more pleasurable than breastforms. and soon tossed mine out. Unfortunately, a lot of the development within the arreolas and nipples went away with time, so they became much less sensitive. I've been able to hide them as moobs to this point. But I've always wanted to grow them larger, or at least re-activate my existing breast tissue to its former glory.
I still have some ainterol PM capsules from when I last went on it, but had stopped after just 2-3 months, after my wife realized I was taking it with my nipples standing out more again. She scolded me that with any more growth that I wouldn't be able to hide them anymore and would need to start wearing a bra - which I wasn't ready for yet, so I stopped.
I just started on PM again last Monday, and almost immediately I found my femme self coming strongly to the forefront. So the PM couldn't really have been doing anything so quickly (single 500mg pill first day, then 1000 daily since. Bumped to 1500mg today, spread throughout the day. My head has been like a freaking whirlwind this whole week. But basically I've been doing too much online fem shopping, shaved/epilated my chest and legs on Tues/ Wed. I actually epilated my very furry arms and hands on Saturday, which I hadn't done since 2011. And today I got my eyebrows threaded, and asked for them to be done to look more feminine. I've gotten my brows threaded before, but never actually dared to ask for them to be fem-appearing. And oh yeah, I skipped that I think I had my "egg" moment on Wed/Thurs, and concluded that I quite possibly am in fact Trans, and probably need to something about it - and in my mind accepted that it might even include transitioning (Brienne of Tarth's larger, older sister anyone?) So I'm finally pursuing gender counseling to try to figure out exactly what my deal is. I kinda feel now that if I were closer to normal female size, that I might have pursued transition back in 2010, while 31 instead. And the "magic button" scenario, to become a genetic girl I would have pushed it in a heartbeat.
I've been doing LOTS of soul-searching this week, been researching LOTS as well. And today I think I finally found my femme name.
I plan to post a few things, including photos of my progress. But this post is already too long - Sorry.
A week ago I never thought I would post on here, but sometimes a LOT can happen in a week.
Jessica
