28-01-2024, 01:01 AM
You will get through it. You have to do what makes you happy. I truly believe that. It’s just a couple of days. Just let it roll off your back. You got this!
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28-01-2024, 02:32 PM
I know what you mean about visiting family. I was nervous the first time I went to visit my family the first time that my breasts were rather visible. By this time I was getting vary comfortable in public. Everything went well. Of course each family is different. You'll do well but main thing is your there. Enjoy your time with your family.
28-01-2024, 03:20 PM
Thanks, MT. I think I'll be okay with the breasts. I already know that they're going to give me shit about my hair all weekend. I'm still unsure of my travel dates, but it will be within the next couple of weeks.
28-01-2024, 06:39 PM
Sometimes the concern is indeed all in our heads. I understand the thoughts though. I recently visited with friends that might as well be family that I hadn't seen in a decade. And I too was struggling with the what ifs. It turned out to be all-for-naught as I was reminded why we have been close for the past thirty years, no matter where we are on this rock.
I do hope the drama is minimal, and the love in your family comes through as a reminder for you as well! Not knowing your family situation, I hope the ribbing is all that it is.
Travel safe, and have some fun!
I do hope the drama is minimal, and the love in your family comes through as a reminder for you as well! Not knowing your family situation, I hope the ribbing is all that it is.
Travel safe, and have some fun!
28-01-2024, 07:27 PM
Thank you. I'm not exactly sure when the travel date is as of yet, but I know it won't be much ribbing but more of a freak-out and non-stop sneering grief.
I'm concerned about a lot of things .... wearing a compression shirt for several days is one of them, but also are my facial changes. I can still pass 100% as male which is fine with me, but hrt, and nbe for that matter too, does make slight changes to your face. A friend of mine flipped out when he saw me after I had started nbe for about six months and he was a combination of freaked out & actually pissed. Go figure.
But it is said that those you see often or daily don't recognize the subtle changes, but those who haven't seen you in years will notice. My facial changes are slight, but there's bo denying the softening of my face. To be honest, in the last few months it has been accelerating, too.
My ass has gotten huge this past year, too. I got the pelvic tilt about 18 months into nbe, but my butt has ballooned within the last six months. While I love this part of hrt, I'm wondering how much the family will notice. You have to know that they've always been hyper-critical of me, so with that in mind, I'm doubly on edge.
My breasts are starting to get large, which I love. While I don't necessarily hide them around here, I'm reeeally not looking forward to wearing a compression shirt for several days. I also have a complete lack of body hair, too. I'm unsure if that'll go unnoticed or not.
In the end I'll just claim ignorance and suffer through their expected long list of criticisms.
I'm concerned about a lot of things .... wearing a compression shirt for several days is one of them, but also are my facial changes. I can still pass 100% as male which is fine with me, but hrt, and nbe for that matter too, does make slight changes to your face. A friend of mine flipped out when he saw me after I had started nbe for about six months and he was a combination of freaked out & actually pissed. Go figure.
But it is said that those you see often or daily don't recognize the subtle changes, but those who haven't seen you in years will notice. My facial changes are slight, but there's bo denying the softening of my face. To be honest, in the last few months it has been accelerating, too.
My ass has gotten huge this past year, too. I got the pelvic tilt about 18 months into nbe, but my butt has ballooned within the last six months. While I love this part of hrt, I'm wondering how much the family will notice. You have to know that they've always been hyper-critical of me, so with that in mind, I'm doubly on edge.
My breasts are starting to get large, which I love. While I don't necessarily hide them around here, I'm reeeally not looking forward to wearing a compression shirt for several days. I also have a complete lack of body hair, too. I'm unsure if that'll go unnoticed or not.
In the end I'll just claim ignorance and suffer through their expected long list of criticisms.
28-01-2024, 09:32 PM
I wonder how many members of BN are active PT/FT CD? With my upcoming trip home I realized I haven't bought male clothes in I don't know how many years, and because of my body changes, now I barely have anything that fits enough to conceal when I'm in male mode!
The last 3-7 years I've steadily collected a nice casual female wardrobe. While I don't have near the sense of style that Lois has, (I hope that she's doing well these days), i still am happy with what I've acquired.
My summer wardrobe is 90% female it seems. I got rid of all my men's shorts & t-shirts. I only wear Liz Claiborne pull up shorts & Lee jeans shorts for women now. With my pelvic tilt, they fit like a glove.
I have several casual t-shirts & pull over scoop neck shirts that I love. Anything more than casual androgynous clothing is out of my comfort zone.
My winter CD clothing is casual yoga pants and women's long sleeve t-shirts. I've yet to get any jeans and I can't bring myself to wear any shirts or sweaters with any sense of flair to them. My casual women's clothing might look androgynous in style, but it greatly soothes my dysphoria.
I'm in a skirt around the house 24/7/365 for the last decade. I have several warm winter nightgowns that I adore. I used to wear thigh highs in place of dress socks under my slacks and I've been wearing French cut panties for 30 years or more.
Recently on a few occasions I've worn some nice Under Gent Briefs, and it was a shock that they didn't fit anymore. While I obviously know that NBE/HRT has shrunk me a great deal, the shocking part was how empty the bulge part of briefs were and also how uncomfortable that empty space was with me just flopping around in there. There was nothing snug about them. When I put on a pair of Hanes High Cut Panties now, it's ahhhhhhh such a comfortable fit.
So I still have to get a pair or two of women's shoes that aren't too flashy. Certainly nothing that would turn heads. I still would like to get a nice comfy women's windbreaker, too. Again, nothing too fancy to draw attention.
I guess I'm at the point now where I'm comfortable in my feminine shell that men's clothing honestly is unappealing to me anymore. I'm definitely at the point now with 4.5 years of a steady dose of estrogen every single day, where just being around groups of high test men make me uncomfortable. Go figure because I seem to find myself in situations like that all the time but I'm not as easy hanging with the boys as I used to be, but I can fake it.
I guess the longer I'm on estrogen. The longer my hair is getting. The softer my face gets. The softer my hair free body gets. The bigger my tits & ass get, and yes, the smaller my dick gets, the more I love this new body of mine.
While I have no problem shooting coyotes, (I killed two here on the farm last year), and all the obvious hard work that goes on with this homestead, I guess it's no secret that women can do this too.
I still have absolutely zero, none, zilch, nada aspirations of transitioning. None whatsoever. But I will take this new HRT life as far as I can. My focus now is to see if I can put a dent in this beard of mine.
So far it looks like I've removed all the dark hairs from my mustache, and only (a good bit of gray remains). But the more I zap it with the IPL, the softer it gets and the regrowth rate has slowed considerably. Perhaps that is in conjunction with the Bicalutamide, but the growth rate if my beard vs mustache is vastly different right now.
So, with this standing photo that is my natural posture right now. I first noticed the lean when the pelvic tilt kicked in about the 18th month mark of NBE. The longer I've been on HRT and the bigger my butt gets, the more difficult I find it to "stand up straight". Tbh, I always seem to feel like I'm falling forward.
Sorry for the ramble today folks. That's what two hours of insomnia stress related sleep will get you, and I am curious who all is Part Time / Full Time CD.
https://ibb.co/m4RBM3k
https://ibb.co/3kCkj7X
https://ibb.co/gTnjmt8
https://ibb.co/cF3NCG7
The last 3-7 years I've steadily collected a nice casual female wardrobe. While I don't have near the sense of style that Lois has, (I hope that she's doing well these days), i still am happy with what I've acquired.
My summer wardrobe is 90% female it seems. I got rid of all my men's shorts & t-shirts. I only wear Liz Claiborne pull up shorts & Lee jeans shorts for women now. With my pelvic tilt, they fit like a glove.
I have several casual t-shirts & pull over scoop neck shirts that I love. Anything more than casual androgynous clothing is out of my comfort zone.
My winter CD clothing is casual yoga pants and women's long sleeve t-shirts. I've yet to get any jeans and I can't bring myself to wear any shirts or sweaters with any sense of flair to them. My casual women's clothing might look androgynous in style, but it greatly soothes my dysphoria.
I'm in a skirt around the house 24/7/365 for the last decade. I have several warm winter nightgowns that I adore. I used to wear thigh highs in place of dress socks under my slacks and I've been wearing French cut panties for 30 years or more.
Recently on a few occasions I've worn some nice Under Gent Briefs, and it was a shock that they didn't fit anymore. While I obviously know that NBE/HRT has shrunk me a great deal, the shocking part was how empty the bulge part of briefs were and also how uncomfortable that empty space was with me just flopping around in there. There was nothing snug about them. When I put on a pair of Hanes High Cut Panties now, it's ahhhhhhh such a comfortable fit.
So I still have to get a pair or two of women's shoes that aren't too flashy. Certainly nothing that would turn heads. I still would like to get a nice comfy women's windbreaker, too. Again, nothing too fancy to draw attention.
I guess I'm at the point now where I'm comfortable in my feminine shell that men's clothing honestly is unappealing to me anymore. I'm definitely at the point now with 4.5 years of a steady dose of estrogen every single day, where just being around groups of high test men make me uncomfortable. Go figure because I seem to find myself in situations like that all the time but I'm not as easy hanging with the boys as I used to be, but I can fake it.
I guess the longer I'm on estrogen. The longer my hair is getting. The softer my face gets. The softer my hair free body gets. The bigger my tits & ass get, and yes, the smaller my dick gets, the more I love this new body of mine.
While I have no problem shooting coyotes, (I killed two here on the farm last year), and all the obvious hard work that goes on with this homestead, I guess it's no secret that women can do this too.
I still have absolutely zero, none, zilch, nada aspirations of transitioning. None whatsoever. But I will take this new HRT life as far as I can. My focus now is to see if I can put a dent in this beard of mine.
So far it looks like I've removed all the dark hairs from my mustache, and only (a good bit of gray remains). But the more I zap it with the IPL, the softer it gets and the regrowth rate has slowed considerably. Perhaps that is in conjunction with the Bicalutamide, but the growth rate if my beard vs mustache is vastly different right now.
So, with this standing photo that is my natural posture right now. I first noticed the lean when the pelvic tilt kicked in about the 18th month mark of NBE. The longer I've been on HRT and the bigger my butt gets, the more difficult I find it to "stand up straight". Tbh, I always seem to feel like I'm falling forward.
Sorry for the ramble today folks. That's what two hours of insomnia stress related sleep will get you, and I am curious who all is Part Time / Full Time CD.
https://ibb.co/m4RBM3k
https://ibb.co/3kCkj7X
https://ibb.co/gTnjmt8
https://ibb.co/cF3NCG7
28-01-2024, 11:31 PM
All of your pictures just shows how feminine your body has become not just boobs, you have curves to go with your very impressive boobs and a booty as well. I would think wombs cloths fit you much better. 
28-01-2024, 11:50 PM
To me you look completely feminine. Which is great most of the time. However you can still pull of being male for a couple of days. You will be fine. Just be confident
02-02-2024, 01:51 PM
Steve,
Your newest photos are very feminine. If I didn't know I wouldn't have guessed....
Its funny you mention being a secret CD. I lived for dressing when I was a teenager. That slowly went away but now I find I feel completely normal in some female clothing...so much so that I consider wearing them when I make my infrequent trips to town. But i don't. As someone told me recently, my face is neither male nor female normally so I wonder if I am causing confusion as I am.
I stopped taking Estrogen because of a severe asthma attack from nowhere...evidently it can be caused by too little or too much Estrogen...but now what I thought came from the Estrogen is back...pain in my boobs...long fantastic stories my brain weaves when things are quiet, with me always playing the female lead....a deep feeling of calm and acceptance...and more...so I wonder about what is really going on.
Sometimes I think I have transitioned without meaning to.
I also need to be strong due to living in a wilderness area in Appalachia. Besides always being on the alert for big critters there is wood to be moved, forest areas to be maintained, snow to be cleared, plus I train almost everyday for races I never enter. I was always supposed to be a tough woman, so its all fine.
And I guess this is all about becoming who we were meant to be.
Anyway, I hope the stress relaxes for you.
Best,
Owlie
Your newest photos are very feminine. If I didn't know I wouldn't have guessed....
Its funny you mention being a secret CD. I lived for dressing when I was a teenager. That slowly went away but now I find I feel completely normal in some female clothing...so much so that I consider wearing them when I make my infrequent trips to town. But i don't. As someone told me recently, my face is neither male nor female normally so I wonder if I am causing confusion as I am.
I stopped taking Estrogen because of a severe asthma attack from nowhere...evidently it can be caused by too little or too much Estrogen...but now what I thought came from the Estrogen is back...pain in my boobs...long fantastic stories my brain weaves when things are quiet, with me always playing the female lead....a deep feeling of calm and acceptance...and more...so I wonder about what is really going on.
Sometimes I think I have transitioned without meaning to.
I also need to be strong due to living in a wilderness area in Appalachia. Besides always being on the alert for big critters there is wood to be moved, forest areas to be maintained, snow to be cleared, plus I train almost everyday for races I never enter. I was always supposed to be a tough woman, so its all fine.
And I guess this is all about becoming who we were meant to be.
Anyway, I hope the stress relaxes for you.
Best,
Owlie
02-02-2024, 03:01 PM
(This post was last modified: 02-02-2024, 03:03 PM by Stevenator_.)
Owllee ....
Your post has so much that I can relate to.
While unfortunately I am not in the wilderness, (I would LOVE to live in the Cohutta), I do have to do a lot of the things you mentioned on our wooded tract of land. Today for instance I'm going to be mowing down a large area of pine saplings that boarder our drive. I'm going to be hurting tomorrow.
While my land holds deer, I haven't seen them as often this year. We had a bad infestation of coyotes last year. I killed two, the neighbor down through my woods killed two, and the guy across the road killed one. I've seen two more since.
I have a couple of other things that's pulling me back to the manly man side of things and I'm not 100% comfortable with that. Mainly for the focus on myself that I'd rather avoid. The last four years here alone in the woods has been rather nice and I'd much rather avoid the public scrutiny.
It's funny since you mention Appalachia, is how so much these days is now considered sub/urban, when it's generally thought of the balds & hollars in the hills.
Stay well.
Your post has so much that I can relate to.
While unfortunately I am not in the wilderness, (I would LOVE to live in the Cohutta), I do have to do a lot of the things you mentioned on our wooded tract of land. Today for instance I'm going to be mowing down a large area of pine saplings that boarder our drive. I'm going to be hurting tomorrow.
While my land holds deer, I haven't seen them as often this year. We had a bad infestation of coyotes last year. I killed two, the neighbor down through my woods killed two, and the guy across the road killed one. I've seen two more since.
I have a couple of other things that's pulling me back to the manly man side of things and I'm not 100% comfortable with that. Mainly for the focus on myself that I'd rather avoid. The last four years here alone in the woods has been rather nice and I'd much rather avoid the public scrutiny.
It's funny since you mention Appalachia, is how so much these days is now considered sub/urban, when it's generally thought of the balds & hollars in the hills.
Stay well.
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