[Jessi]

*smiles*  Thanks for defending me, prostatenipple,  but I'm a big girl I'll be okay.  Also, ain't nothing Didi said that wasn't true.    Most of my personal experience (speaking with others) has been with FtM trans, and the levels of dysphoria the FtM I've known had was just brutal.  I mean brutal, it'll tear your heart out.  And just the mere plans/promise of future transition surgery made such a mental health difference, you'd think they'd just come back from the dead.

But yeah- we do all have to get along here, and seems to me there's a very wide range of personal experiences and philosophies here.  If fetish discussion is allowed here, then perhaps its own subforum.  Or perhaps it's time to declare certain subjects off the table.  There's such a grey area and humans are so incredibly complex when it comes to sex and gender that personally, I think if seating arrangements can be adhered to, there's room for everyone.  But maybe there's not- I'm not an admin here, I'm just here for the breasts (mine). 

Posted by CM213 - 3 hours ago
I'm sure those individuals who really do have both sets of genitals and their parents didn't do anything about it when the individual was still a baby, I'm sure they feel like outcasts.

I don't know.  Personally, I think I'd have grown up to be resentful of being forced into a box that might not have been the one I'd have chosen as an adult.  The person I automatically think of is Hida Viloria, whose parents explicitly decided to not surgically alter them as an infant as they had been urged to do, and Hida is an intersex activist who preaches against that sort of thing, having met many intersex individuals for whom surgery and hormonal interventions as infants and children left them traumatized and physically damaged.  I'm on Hida's side of that argument.

[Heaven's Night]

Everything is fine, but respect is earned, not given and my respect stops right at misogyny. Fetishising transition, trans women and drooling about silly fantasies of mixed genitals is quite nasty. I will not respect that. Also this isn't cool for intersex people who actually have to live with such condition out of sheer bad luck.  

I suffer from extreme sex/gender/body dysphoria, I know exactly what a demon it is, I know exactly how it works. I got two diagnosis for this thing btw. One from local doctor and other from trans clinic. That result took year and half to make and its been assessed by a group of people even. BN is really useful place on pondering upon ones possible dysphoria and how to deal with it, it was that to me too, one of the main culprits that finally pushed me into transitioning.

If I'm somehow pushing closeted trans women and non binary people away, then I'm extremely sorry, but I somehow do feel that my posting here is doing the opposite by encouraging them to figure themselves out like I did before. I think men on the forum should gather some understanding and respect for those who suffer from dysphoria about their genitals and who are in far more vulnerable position than cis men to whom this is a fun hobby.

[Shirazmn]

As much as I understand, from the outside, the struggle of trans people, I also understand that not everyone has dysphoria and that not everyone who has a fetish is against the rights of trans people.
@Didi, not every person who has a fantasy about genitals is against women. This forum is by its own nature a place for people who have surpassed the dichotomy between what is a "man" and what is a "woman". The very existence of this place is linked to growing secondary sexual female characteristics on a genetic male body. While I am the first person that will call out nudes and pervy behaviours in the main sections, I think that there is nothing disrespectful in discussing people's fantasies in a thread inside a sub-subsection dedicated to adult talk. I doubt anyone here thinks of you when discussing penises and vaginas. It's not always about the reader, it's not always about me, and it's not always about you.

It's BN a fetish site? No. But if it's a free space then it can't even be conditioned by the most restrictive views of some of its users. Last time I checked, BN was not exclusively a transgender website, so its language and audience will reflect those of a more general population spread across cultures, backgrounds, genders, and, why not, fetishes.

If some users who are not even directly mentioned in the subject of the thread find the content of this very specific discussion "offensive", I am sure that they can find dozens of other threads to read instead of policing this one.

[Heaven's Night]

I wont shut up, if its free speech then I'm allowed to express my distaste for some topics.   I wont be here nagging to no end about it though, I came to say my thoughts mostly from solidarity to Caylee, I knew exactly why she got upset.

If I wont speak for trans women here, then who will? We can all fit in and there's no need to agree on every issue either.

[prostatenipple]

If I wont speak for trans women here, then who will? We can all fit in and there's no need to agree on every issue either.

You don't speak for ALL trans women. Not all trans women would completely agree with you.
I agree with Lotus on this thread - it was a misunderstanding. We don't need misandry here.

We are all here to learn, progress, and help each other in this space, in safety. Please don't make thing harder for people that are struggling to come to terms with who they are and what they feel they are becoming. As I said earlier - lets all be respectful and pleasant.

[Heaven's Night]

There are far better subjects to post about anyway.

[Alexis P]

I see this topic resurfaced after a few months it first came out.

To be fair i wouldn't mind having both, although i'm really not sure how it would work out in terms of looks and functionality. Not that i really care about my genitals, guess i never felt too much dysphoria from it.

Thanks for the link Lotus. Actually after watching some pictures there i got a sudden realization surgery scares the shit out of me. I'd like the results of it, but i'm not sure i'd able to mentally sustain all the physical pain and recovery while being covered in bandages and such.

[Heaven's Night]

You don't speak for ALL trans women. Not all trans women would completely agree with you.
I agree with Lotus on this thread - it was a misunderstanding. We don't need misandry here.

We are all here to learn, progress, and help each other in this space, in safety. Please don't make thing harder for people that are struggling to come to terms with who they are and what they feel they are becoming. As I said earlier - lets all be respectful and pleasant.

I will adress this only once because its pissing me off that I left without saying anything.

I damn well speak for MANY binary trans women and especially those who I think are my friends here on BN. I don't give a fuck about who would somehow not agree with me about something, I'm not even sure what agreement this is supposed to mean? What misandry? Where exactly there's misandry? I do not hate men, but porn brained fucktard fetish garbage truly pisses me off and is very upsetting due to its inherent MISOGYNY which is absolutely blantant and undeniable. This thread is kinda going right next to all that. Kinda.

Yes, this is safe space and it'll stay so. I'm not making anybody's struggle harder, I'm here to make it easier, especially to who ever is on a simlar path as I am. I promised to stay for trans women and my friends and that's exactly what I'm doing. Whoever feels upset about stuff I say, I'm sorry and private messaging exists and so on and please do correct me if I behave badly, I'm not some goddamn perfect holier-than-thou, but merely human, and not without issues at that.

I am respectful, the moment respect is earned. It wont be given. Pleansant depends on the topic at hand.

And whom it may concern, don't be surprised about what I think about this topic and many others. I am strongly a fourth wave feminist and quite radical at my thinking. For a lot of reasons which would take too long to explain. But I'm absolutely not any kind of man hater. Also someone on Reddit coined a very interesting term, trans separatist, I resonate with that a lot. I'm not part of trans communities online much because I don't belong with them, I relate very little to a lot of them. If the only relatable thing is gender identity, that's not much. I relate more to those who are struggling to do a dysphoria based sex reassignment. So I really don't care which trans women agree with my ideas.

Oh and one last thing, doing a penis preserving SRS is totally cool choice for those who feel its right thing to do. As is staying non op as that's totally cool too! Non op trans women have it easier as they can live without the cost and risks involved and its totally fine. Heck my girlfriend is non op as she's scared to death about surgery stuff. All this is cool, fetishing it is not.

That's it, I'm done with this thread, next one up something nicer.

[prostatenipple]

But I'm absolutely not any kind of man hater. Also someone on Reddit coined a very interesting term, trans separatist, I resonate with that a lot. I'm not part of trans communities online much because I don't belong with them, I relate very little to a lot of them. If the only relatable thing is gender identity, that's not much. I relate more to those who are struggling to do a dysphoria based sex reassignment. So I really don't care which trans women agree with my ideas.

Thank you for saying this part. It gives me a better understanding.