[Benizake]

I am slowly closing in on 1 year of BO usage. While I have thrown my head around the internet to get a better grasp on where I'm going, there are still many question left unanswered. I thought I was read up, and ready for every possible scenario, but I guess not. It seems like estrogen is a lot more powerful than I could have ever imagined. So here I am. Asking some crazy questions that I'm incapable of answering myself.

- So I recently started to feel some weight in my head. I don't know if it's related to me starting to experience symptoms of a monthly cycle, but better safe than sorry. It feels like I'm experiencing a huge spike in brain activity all of a sudden. The rest of my body feels completely normal. It feels like there's a fluid swimming around, injecting different parts of my brain with stimulants. And this comes with some very rapid mood swings. My eyes get watery out of the blue, and right after, I feel like laughing out loud for no apparent reason. It's quite fascinating considering that this only happens whenever the "headache" returns. Very curious to hear if anyone else has experienced the same.

- Is it normal to have breakouts while on BO? The biggest recent change I made to my regimen was increasing my daily dosage. Everything has been consistent for the last few months. But even so, I got my butt bombarded with pimples for a week straight. I know I had some excessive amount of pimples in the face in the beginning while I went to the gym. But that was while I was experimenting like a mad scientist. Now, I'm steadily maintaining my regimen and still have spontaneous breakouts. If pimples are the norm, then I need to know ASAP. Cause I need to mentally prepare myself again if I'll get back to two huge Panther cap mushrooms underneath my pants.

- Is HRT and psychedelics a no go? I have done some LSD a while back and was discussing with some friends if we should do it again in the near future. But is this a good idea? Especially when we are experiencing a lot of mental changes. Should I hold it off until the progress plateaus or just stay away from it all together?

- Does the breast development come later? Or am I just one of those late bloomers? I can feel that the ducts and lobes have been getting a lot bigger in recent times. But there is still not any major visual difference at all. No areola development and barely any fatty tissue. It feels like my body is preparing to build a skyscraper or something. Let's just hope my body is taking it's sweet time on building the foundation.

- Am I turning GAY? (๏д๏) Now, I have read a bit about this topic before, but I never took it seriously until now. I have always been asexual, and never had any meaningful connection to anyone. And I was certain it would stay this way. But now, that certainty has been smashed, spit on, and thrown through the roof. I'm starting to feel like a big old cougar looking for some tasty men to hunt down. I have been going to the gym for more that 10 years. And when I saw a big, strong man, my thoughts were always similar to this: "Damn. He's strong. I wonder how long he's been exercising to get to this point." Now it's more like: "DAMN! Look at those muscles! I really want to touch those BIG, HARD muscles." HUH? WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK?! HOW can I even have such thoughts. I live in a collective with 3 other guys, who all go to the gym, so this way too mind-boggling to just ignore. It's CRAZY. Is this normal or am I just being a weirdo for having such thoughts?

Thanks in advance
(◎≧v≦)人(≧v≦●)

[Heaven's Night]

Estrogen often works as emotion multiplier, brainfog goes away, being able to think way more clearly than before and so on seems quite typical. I had all these things happen and at first it felt quite extreme. With time, everything has settled and adapted into a new normal state of mind. Emotions keep being on 11/10 though and I love it. Much less anger, but I'm easily sad and easily depressed but also get out of it quicker.

Acne on BO seems to happen to some. And I know HRT alone does some of that too. Nothing strange about it, usually it seems to last for a while and then settle later.

I have no idea about psychelics as I don't touch any of it, not even weed as it feels so different now. I would presume it could get more intense than before?

Breast development is highly individual thing which has everything to do with your genetics, age and the HRT/NBE program you're on. Getting started might take quite long time and at first, development might be slow, and then speed up later. Mine was much slower before Tanner stage 4 where things went on crazy super fast growth spurts. Then slowed down again and sped up once more in last few months due to some hormone changes etc. So it might take quite a while, some get budding immediately, others take their time. Breast growth is almost never a straight line, its not linear and never stable, speed of changes and time each development stage takes is a bit random. If you have several months without much change, that's no reason to worry.

Gay? If you're a trans woman and into men, you're straight. Its kinda interesting about orientation, some people do a total U turn when they transition, others stay as they are. The dynamics change though, I'm still mostly into women and femininity in general just like I've been all my life. But now that I have transitioned that changes things, obviously straight women don't care about me any more and cis gender lesbians are mostly awkward too and there's some things about my relationship which makes things... Interesting. So that leaves me with other transsex people and that's it and as I'm mostly into feminine ones, that means trans women and non binary people. Mostly. Its strange, but I didn't experience a major orientation change unlike some people do.

But a trans woman who's into guys is straight because she's a woman. lol.

[Benizake]

Thank you so much for the answers DIDI.

Y'know, I first thought BO was mainly a breast enhancer that happened to do a little bit of feminization as well. Since it has its own section on the forum, I thought I would get similar results to PM. Oh how wrong I was. Who would have though that BO reaches the ranks of other HRT treatments. Not me. That's for sure. The plan was to just dip my toes into feminization and then evaluate if taking a plunge would be feasible or not. I guess that plan also went through the roof. I have now climbed atop a 10m high spring board and done a vertical dive straight to the bottom of the feminizing pool. And now that I am here, I don't think I'll ever want to go back up. 

This all just feels so surreal. I was really not prepared to get here so soon. I'm living at a constant 100/10 and I have barely started my HRT journey. Who knows what the future brings. I can at least be certain that I'll be updating on a lot on my progress for the foreseeable future. And as with many, I think this Is where I can confidently say: "I have reached the point of no return". So, you're right. I guess I'm a woman now. Thank you all so much for helping me find my true self.
(Ｔ▽Ｔ)

On a second thought, maybe we should put up a sign that says "WARNING: This supplement might turn you into a woman". 

[tomi66]

Hi Benizake,
Didi was spot on with her info,nothing to add to that.

LSD is a mood altering psychedelic chemical. You mood at the time of taking it will dictate your reaction while under the influence, the additional hormones may increase the effects, but I can't find any additional information on it.

I spent 2 years on BO and switched to estradiol 2 months ago, not because I didn't like effects but because I did so I thought I would go all in on feminization, but I digress. It did not change my sexual preference at all. BO did make erections extremely difficult and strangely enough on estradiol and off BO completely an erection is getting easier to get and maintain but cialis is still needed.

[Benizake]

Thank you for sharing @tomi66     ฅ^.ᆺ.^ฅ

My mood is currently at an all time high, and it should therefore in theory, at least, be the best time for some psychedelics. The weird part is that I already have heightened brain activity at the moment. And it almost feels like I'm already on mushrooms, but without the hallucinations. So what happens when you combine heightened activity with another layer of activity on top of it? I have not found an answer yet, and I think I'll pass on trying it out unless a few others come out with such experiences. I'll happily skip feeling the highest high if it entails becoming a vegetable.

And what you have experienced on BO is very intriguing. Contrary to you, I've had some serious mental changes so far on BO. It almost feels like I have ascended to another realm of existence. And with it came a huge mental shift. If we use my rod as and example, I can still easily achieve an erection and even ejaculate with a modest sperm count. The big difference is that I simply don't want to. My body has no problems in maintaining the shaft, but my mind is starting to find it more repulsive by the day. Here I am, refusing to shake my meat, because the mere thought of shaking my meat makes me unable to even attempt doing so.

[tomi66]

BO affects many of us differently and the time it takes to start changing our bodies and mental state also differs. Some people report it does nothing and some say it started working after taking it once and the changes were irreversible.

I had responded to BO within the center of the bell curve, nothing anomalous happening. I, like many others wanted feminization and better shaped breasts. What I wasn't expecting was the mental changes. My mental changes were a calmness and something I can't really describe, but it helped me fill a gap in my psychey that I didn't know had a deficit.

I started a low dose HRT after reading more about it,I felt it would be better option for me at this point, two years on BO was a lot of BO and it was getting expensive, hrt cost me 40 for 3 months and unlike when I first started to try getting off BO, I don't miss BO at all. After my next labs I may add some BO to help the estradiol alon, but then again I like getting my erection back so I might just hang on to my BO for later.

[Benizake]

Yeah. The mental changes hit me like a bombshell. It exploded a wall I never knew I had. A huge hole has been filled in my mind, and if I were to go back to who I was a few months ago, I would probably feel like an empty husk in comparison. 

And what's up with the BO prices these days? The prices seem to have almost doubled. I almost feel like I'm getting ripped off. But who knows. Maybe the demand has increased a lot with the transgender boom in western society. Or maybe the long waiting times for HRT treatment. It's crazy that I have to wait at least 2 more years just to have the chance to acquire it legally. Let's just hope it won't get any more expensive than this. Cause If I'm gonna spend much more that 100 on a 3 month supply, I might just go broke. 
૮ ◞ ﻌ ◟ ა

[tomi66]

Benizake,
You must not live in the USA. HRT is available by teledoc. Make an appointment online, answer a health questionnaire, see a doctor via video conference, talk about why you want it, what gender you identify with and the prescribed a treatment plan and evaluate in 3 months with a follow up labs. I am on month 2.

[CM213]

Dr z, has a YouTube video that specifically talks about individuals who say that their sexual orientation changes from hrt during their transition. Granted there is no real scientific studies behind it, she has a few pretty strong logical hypothesis about why some individuals report that their orientation was shifted. Very interesting.

[Benizake]

Benizake,
You must not live in the USA. HRT is available by teledoc. Make an appointment online, answer a health questionnaire, see a doctor via video conference, talk about why you want it, what gender you identify with and the prescribed a treatment plan and evaluate in 3 months with a follow up labs. I am on month 2.

Thank you for sharing tomi.
I live in Norway, where the laws regarding online medical treatments are rather confusing. I know someone who tried online treatment a few years ago. Unfortunately for him, the drugs never made it through customs. Maybe the rules have changed, but I know not of any such cases over here as of yet. I have also done a few inquires here and there, but I usually just get the cold shoulder. I did send one to teledoc though. So who knows, maybe there'll be a satisfying reply.