I too was in the Army and made it my career. Things can become difficult if you per sue growing breasts before you get out. There will come a time on a deployment someone will see your breasts and then what? Are you ready for the ridicule and humiliating comments that are coming? How about an annual physical and the Dr starts asking questions? Just think twice before going too far.
(22-11-2013, 02:23 AM)colokid Wrote: I too was in the Army and made it my career. Things can become difficult if you per sue growing breasts before you get out. There will come a time on a deployment someone will see your breasts and then what? Are you ready for the ridicule and humiliating comments that are coming? How about an annual physical and the Dr starts asking questions? Just think twice before going too far.
I have already thought of that, which is why I'm only growing a little right now. Just enough to be able to grab and play, but not enough for anyone to really question too much. Taking the PM has also curbed my anxiety a LOT, which is something that had plagued me my entire life (even though I take medication for it.)
Nice to see there are a few retired military here. Fwoodhull, you would be wise to take the advice they've given.
You do realize when you go to a doctor, where it is they put their stethoscope? I've gotten a lot of looks and questions from my civilian docs, and a military doc will only be more stringent. They are duty bound to look after your health. Give them a reason, and they'll have you in the lab for blood tests in no time. It's free for them, and you, and the lab is usually just down the hall. Do you know that they can prescribe for you to get a mammogram, whether you like it or not? Just give them a reason! I found that little fact out when my wife had her mammogram on-post a few years ago. I jokingly mentioned to the tech that I ought to get my doc to order one for me, and she was not the least surprised. she went on to say they do at least 15 male soldiers a month! Like I said, just give them a reason! Also, whenever and for whatever reason you ever need a chest X-ray, CT scan, etc., they will make you remove your upper clothing. ready for that? Unless you're in a privileged unit, you're going to take a PT test twice a year. In a t-shirt and shorts. You're not going to hide any growth in a sweaty t-shirt. Even if the chain-of-command doesn't notice, your buddies will, and I can imagine the comments.
Then there's the matter of family. you do know that after 10 years of marriage, your wife is entitled to 1/2 of your retirement? And that the military will gladly ensure that she gets it? Along with child support for 4 kids, your financial future would be a bit cloudy. You're already giving her reason to consider that. It would not be news for me to tell you that if she likes dick that much, and you can no longer supply it, then she will find someone who will. Unless that arrangement suits you?
I would not expect the military to begin being accepting of trans-anything for some time. In the meantime, you need to be realistic, and keep below the radar. And for someone with the responsibility for a wife and 4 kids, you need to lose the selfishness.
I know I've been blunt, but I'm nothing if not realistic. I got through it, but with your current approach, I have doubts. Patti
You do realize when you go to a doctor, where it is they put their stethoscope? I've gotten a lot of looks and questions from my civilian docs, and a military doc will only be more stringent. They are duty bound to look after your health. Give them a reason, and they'll have you in the lab for blood tests in no time. It's free for them, and you, and the lab is usually just down the hall. Do you know that they can prescribe for you to get a mammogram, whether you like it or not? Just give them a reason! I found that little fact out when my wife had her mammogram on-post a few years ago. I jokingly mentioned to the tech that I ought to get my doc to order one for me, and she was not the least surprised. she went on to say they do at least 15 male soldiers a month! Like I said, just give them a reason! Also, whenever and for whatever reason you ever need a chest X-ray, CT scan, etc., they will make you remove your upper clothing. ready for that? Unless you're in a privileged unit, you're going to take a PT test twice a year. In a t-shirt and shorts. You're not going to hide any growth in a sweaty t-shirt. Even if the chain-of-command doesn't notice, your buddies will, and I can imagine the comments.
Then there's the matter of family. you do know that after 10 years of marriage, your wife is entitled to 1/2 of your retirement? And that the military will gladly ensure that she gets it? Along with child support for 4 kids, your financial future would be a bit cloudy. You're already giving her reason to consider that. It would not be news for me to tell you that if she likes dick that much, and you can no longer supply it, then she will find someone who will. Unless that arrangement suits you?
I would not expect the military to begin being accepting of trans-anything for some time. In the meantime, you need to be realistic, and keep below the radar. And for someone with the responsibility for a wife and 4 kids, you need to lose the selfishness.
I know I've been blunt, but I'm nothing if not realistic. I got through it, but with your current approach, I have doubts. Patti
I have thought of all of that, which is why I am proceeding with caution. Truth be told, since I have been taking PM, I haven't had nearly as many problems with my anxiety as I used to. I also feel a lot more confident, which is a very rare thing for me. If I am really not a male (despite having a male body), then the question is do I either; continue living my life as a male, allowing life to move on but being miserable and making everyone else around me miserable in the process, or pursue transitioning and completely flip my life over and start all new? I know that is a personal choice, both with very heavy outcomes, which should be considered VERY carefully and thoroughly.
On a side note, I am a pretty big asshole. I had intentionally left a tube of my breast cream in the bathroom after using it, and my wife found it. I've broken her trust too many times for her to overlook this. I know I'm at fault because I didn't just talk to her about it (which is the issue, not the breast cream itself, or desiring to be female.) I'm not exactly sure where to go from here, but I am going Rio talk it over with my therapist.
On a side note, I am a pretty big asshole. I had intentionally left a tube of my breast cream in the bathroom after using it, and my wife found it. I've broken her trust too many times for her to overlook this. I know I'm at fault because I didn't just talk to her about it (which is the issue, not the breast cream itself, or desiring to be female.) I'm not exactly sure where to go from here, but I am going Rio talk it over with my therapist.
...I'm speechless too fwoodhul. I wish I had something encouraging to tell you but I've been sitting here for 30 minutes, in shock, and I can't think of anything. I don't take relationships lightly so to watch helplessly as YOUR most important relationships crumble is just tragic. I feel bad for you and your kids. Your wife, if she follows through with leaving you, is choosing her own path out of her pain (I'm not judging her - I might do the same if I were her) but it has catastrophic consequences for you and especially your kids. I also know what it's like for you to need to do something about your gender. ...This just sucks! It looks like everyone looses. ...Hang in there. Maybe something unforeseen will shake out in the next few days... In the meantime, know that there are others out here thinking about you and hoping for something good for you and yours.
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