I want to feel sexy and sensual for the first time in my life, but I do not know how to do it. What makes you guys feel sexy and confident? How do you feel sexy when you don’t feel you are?

Do you mean in general? I'm not really sure if I fully understand what your asking but here's what I do. There's alot of things actually, but I notice that I'm always confident in red. It's a power color! So I like throwing throwing on a nice outfit, some fierce red lipstick, nice natural looking make up, a good pair of platforms and a hot bag and BAM! You got it! My parents always told me to look presentable because you never know who you're going to meet that day!

I always remember that when I meet a hot guy and I'm looking absolutely horrible!! But I'm always saved because of my smile! Alot of guys always tell me they love to see me smile! I think that's the best accessory a girl can have! Oh and confidence! People pick up on confidence, they're naturally attracted to it! I can look like crap and still be the cockiest person in the room! Honestly, I think the way you display yourself is the way people will approach you. I hope I helped, lemme know if you meant something else mk

Honestly, I'd like to know this, too, because I'm constantly feeling in the dumps about myself. :/

I'll go to a bar or a party, get hit on by plenty of guys who tell me I'm sexy, and I just...still...don't know what they're seeing/talking about. I assume they're just off their rockers, 'cuz there's no way I could be sexy.

Hm, maybe I do have some BDD issues I need to address...

I really thought getting breasts would help my self esteem, and while it does feel good to fill out shirts better, I still feel very awkward. The way they grew makes me look weird in bras, and I've always got gapping at the top of a bra, so even if I fit in something, I still look like I'm trying to wear a bra a few sizes too big for myself...which brings about a whole other kind of self consciousness...

And wearing makeup DOES help me look better/older (my face without makeup makes me look maybe 15 or 16), but for whatever reason I can never get makeup to stay on my eyes...so then I constantly have to worry about touching up my makeup or it smearing and just making me look a wreck...

I just...can't win...

Emily Loretta
I meant in general! Thanks for the reply. I guess it is more about the attitude.

I really thought getting breasts would help my self esteem, and while it does feel good to fill out shirts better, I still feel very awkward. The way they grew makes me look weird in bras, and I've always got gapping at the top of a bra, so even if I fit in something, I still look like I'm trying to wear a bra a few sizes too big for myself...which brings about a whole other kind of self consciousness...

And wearing makeup DOES help me look better/older (my face without makeup makes me look maybe 15 or 16), but for whatever reason I can never get makeup to stay on my eyes...so then I constantly have to worry about touching up my makeup or it smearing and just making me look a wreck...

I just...can't win...

OMG!! I can relate with you so well! I am 20 years olds and I am still mistaken as 15-year-old. I can never find the right make-up to help me look older because of my dark skin lol. I guess I never felt sexy because people look at me as if I were a little girl.

OH! The same thing happens to me when I buy bras. I thought that met I didn’t fit into the size, so I stopped wearing bras for a while. After I lost my initial growth I didn’t bother buying new bras. I still do not know my bra size. I just tell people I too small to have one.

Being feminine is soo complicated!!

I feel sexy when I take care of myself and take time to admire my body. The female form is a work of art...and congratulations, you've got a piece of that!

I think what helps the most is touching yourself...yes in that way, but in other ways too.

Knowing what you like about your body...knowing how it feels, feeling how it feels, knowing how it works and celebrating it is incredibly sexy.

There's an ancient Chinese exercise called the female deer, which is meant to increase your sensuality and do a whole lot of other beneficial things for women. I highly recommend it!

But more than that, I echo what Emily says. Put an effort into feeling good about yourself in other ways and let go of your hang ups. You don't have to have the perfect body to be sexy, it really is a state of mind.

Honestly, I'd like to know this, too, because I'm constantly feeling in the dumps about myself. :/

I'll go to a bar or a party, get hit on by plenty of guys who tell me I'm sexy, and I just...still...don't know what they're seeing/talking about. I assume they're just off their rockers, 'cuz there's no way I could be sexy.

Hm, maybe I do have some BDD issues I need to address...

I really thought getting breasts would help my self esteem, and while it does feel good to fill out shirts better, I still feel very awkward. The way they grew makes me look weird in bras, and I've always got gapping at the top of a bra, so even if I fit in something, I still look like I'm trying to wear a bra a few sizes too big for myself...which brings about a whole other kind of self consciousness...

And wearing makeup DOES help me look better/older (my face without makeup makes me look maybe 15 or 16), but for whatever reason I can never get makeup to stay on my eyes...so then I constantly have to worry about touching up my makeup or it smearing and just making me look a wreck...

I just...can't win...

are you using low quality make up? i tend to get people who complain about their make up but ive been using make up for about 6 years now and from being a broke teen and now the difference is I buy quality items that last me at least a year or more and they never smudge never look trashy and just keep your make up to the natural colors and it'll just enhance what you've got ! (are your eyes colored ? you should play on that... im jealous of white girls with light green hazel eyes !) but honestly there are issues you all need to address if you can't love yourself.. Right now I can honestly say I love myself in any way and even if I don't get my goal of D cups and end up with a fuller bust I'm happy either way !

edit: optimism is key, just keep looking at the better qualities of yourself example: you don't like your belly or waist right now right? but hey you got DD's ! why be sad about one measurement on your body when you got other things going for ya ! ( i tell myself I got no boobs but a nice ass all the time ^.^)

are you using low quality make up? i tend to get people who complain about their make up but ive been using make up for about 6 years now and from being a broke teen and now the difference is I buy quality items that last me at least a year or more and they never smudge never look trashy and just keep your make up to the natural colors and it'll just enhance what you've got ! (are your eyes colored ? you should play on that... im jealous of white girls with light green hazel eyes !) but honestly there are issues you all need to address if you can't love yourself.. Right now I can honestly say I love myself in any way and even if I don't get my goal of D cups and end up with a fuller bust I'm happy either way !

I've actually TRIED more expensive, high-quality stuff before, and could never find one that worked. I know there's gotta be something out there that DOES work, I just don't have the money to waste trying to find it. =_= My friend has the same problem, and she's always trying EVERYTHING. I also don't have oily skin, so I'm not sure why this happens to me so much when everyone else seems to get it right so easily...
Unfortunately, my eyes are BARELY coloured. Lol They're hazel, but the green part ONLY shows in areas with a lot of light, otherwise they still look dark brown (used to be black, so I understand where you're coming from lol) Sometimes I'll use green around my eyeliner to help bring out the green in my eyes, but usually I just go with black because I'm always in a rush (like right now actually, LOL)

I've actually TRIED more expensive, high-quality stuff before, and could never find one that worked. I know there's gotta be something out there that DOES work, I just don't have the money to waste trying to find it. =_= My friend has the same problem, and she's always trying EVERYTHING. I also don't have oily skin, so I'm not sure why this happens to me so much when everyone else seems to get it right so easily...
Unfortunately, my eyes are BARELY coloured. Lol They're hazel, but the green part ONLY shows in areas with a lot of light, otherwise they still look dark brown (used to be black, so I understand where you're coming from lol) Sometimes I'll use green around my eyeliner to help bring out the green in my eyes, but usually I just go with black because I'm always in a rush (like right now actually, LOL)

Do you have a sephora near you? They've got a lot of high quality stuff and they're always willing to make samples for you.

Emily Loretta
I meant in general! Thanks for the reply. I guess it is more about the attitude.

ALWAYS! If a woman doesn't believe she's sexy, why should anyone else? Sexiness isn't just measured by physical appearance. Honestly a regular looking smart guy attracts me more then a hot dumb guy. Sexiness is also mental a state of mind, try showing off how smart, witty or joking you can be. My guy friends love the hot looking chicks but they always go for the smart, cute girl next door who can hold a convo about politics, religion, current events, etc. Even at my uglist of moments I can always show off my intellect. The idea to to mind sex someone before you actually sex someone.

Do you have a sephora near you? They've got a lot of high quality stuff and they're always willing to make samples for you.

I actually have a Sephora catalog right in front of me at the moment. xD But if everything in their store is as expensive as what's in this catalog, that's WAY too expensive. :/ I've even tried eyeliners at ULTA before, ones that everyone raves about, and they...were just terrible on my skin...smudged and had no staying power...so I'm just pretty much at a loss...

I've honestly had more success with $1 eyeliners at this point than I have with anything around $10. I'd hate to try anything for around $20 (money that I don't have) and get the same results.