Ok so here goes.....I am 63, was married for 31 years....6 years ago came out to wife as gay.....backing up a bit....going way back
to early years.....have always felt a need to wear womens clothes...used to dress in my moms stuff probably as early as 10....would put on the bras...slips...nylons..anything I could get my hands on...even used her make up a few times...in fact...when I was about probably 13 or 14....first time I had an orgasm was when I was putting on a pair of nylons.....can remember many nights going to sleep wishing that I would wake up female...or with breasts...have always felt that breasts are just supposed to be there...after divorce over the last 6 years, have tried many thngs to grow...the growing pains and aches that I felt did indeed feel so good...and as the weeks months and years have past....the feeling just keeps getting stronger and stronger to where it is all I think about now ....am I TG......when wife and kids would go on a vacation...there was a solid week that I could dress in her stuff and somehow felt "right"....fast forward to January of this year....doc tested T levels and found them to be low....prescribed androgel and have been on since January....about 2 months into this the shall I say dysphoria has become so strong....I wear bras all the time now except for work....have a little projection as I am currently slightly over weight....and when i look down and see them...its like thats supposed to be there. Thinking of ordering PM again and trying a low dose of may 1 per day...and see if this eases me up....this is simply driving me crazy....as of late have imagined my self with an hour glass figure...wanting more hips and butt....a side note ...when my father passed away discovered he was a crossdresser.....so guess that makes me REALLY screwed up......sorry about the long post....have just had to get this off my chest and out to someone who can maybe help me sort it out...thanks for reading
to early years.....have always felt a need to wear womens clothes...used to dress in my moms stuff probably as early as 10....would put on the bras...slips...nylons..anything I could get my hands on...even used her make up a few times...in fact...when I was about probably 13 or 14....first time I had an orgasm was when I was putting on a pair of nylons.....can remember many nights going to sleep wishing that I would wake up female...or with breasts...have always felt that breasts are just supposed to be there...after divorce over the last 6 years, have tried many thngs to grow...the growing pains and aches that I felt did indeed feel so good...and as the weeks months and years have past....the feeling just keeps getting stronger and stronger to where it is all I think about now ....am I TG......when wife and kids would go on a vacation...there was a solid week that I could dress in her stuff and somehow felt "right"....fast forward to January of this year....doc tested T levels and found them to be low....prescribed androgel and have been on since January....about 2 months into this the shall I say dysphoria has become so strong....I wear bras all the time now except for work....have a little projection as I am currently slightly over weight....and when i look down and see them...its like thats supposed to be there. Thinking of ordering PM again and trying a low dose of may 1 per day...and see if this eases me up....this is simply driving me crazy....as of late have imagined my self with an hour glass figure...wanting more hips and butt....a side note ...when my father passed away discovered he was a crossdresser.....so guess that makes me REALLY screwed up......sorry about the long post....have just had to get this off my chest and out to someone who can maybe help me sort it out...thanks for reading
Trust me, you are NOT alone!! There are TONS of guys that either wish they were women or that would prefer to wear women's cloths all the time or that just want to grow their tits.
Welcome to the forums!! I'm pretty sure you'll find at least SOME answers here!!
Welcome to the forums!! I'm pretty sure you'll find at least SOME answers here!!
Thanks have been around for a while just have not posted much...but it has gotten to the point its all I think about....its like my insides are just all twisted and knoted up and the more I dwell on it the more intense it becomes...its truly like another person inside me
Sounds like she needs to come out and finally be set free! Any plans on making/letting that happen?
Don't know....thinking of gettng PM at a low does and see if perhaps it will calm me a bit and then see what happens...
It's GREAT to let her out to party, but it really sucks to have to put her back in the box! :-( One of the reasons I usually don't wear my bra & tits to bed on a work night; I don't want to get up in the morning and HAVE to take them off!! I'll stay in bed just a LITTLE bit longer, and a LITTLE bit longer, next thing you know, I'm gonna be late for work!!
Breastman, I understand completely. Your story though unique and individual to you bares the same hallmarks of those of many others. You sound like you have a strong GID, and my guess is that you know this. You have been visiting this site longer than I have (and I am one of the oldest active members now...lol), so I am sure you have seen your circumstances reflected on these boards before.
You say you came out to your wife as gay. Is your marriage still intact or are you separated? Is your sexuality acted on or hypothetical?
Regardless, my guess is that your low T level (quite common in later life for bio males) led you into a stronger recognition of your GID, which again is not uncommon.
If you have had these femme desires your entire life they are not going to go away and are likely only to increase.
I cannot tell you what to do, my friend, but the sanest thing for any of us is to accept and nurture what we are.
If you want advice, feel free to pm me and I will be happy to help.
You are not alone, honey, and many of us have been there.
Hugs
Sammie
You say you came out to your wife as gay. Is your marriage still intact or are you separated? Is your sexuality acted on or hypothetical?
Regardless, my guess is that your low T level (quite common in later life for bio males) led you into a stronger recognition of your GID, which again is not uncommon.
If you have had these femme desires your entire life they are not going to go away and are likely only to increase.
I cannot tell you what to do, my friend, but the sanest thing for any of us is to accept and nurture what we are.
If you want advice, feel free to pm me and I will be happy to help.
You are not alone, honey, and many of us have been there.
Hugs
Sammie
(26-07-2014, 10:40 PM)Missed Miss Wrote: Trust me, you are NOT alone!! There are TONS of guys that either wish they were women or that would prefer to wear women's cloths all the time or that just want to grow their tits.U r not alone . Many like you in same boat here . Welcome .
Welcome to the forums!! I'm pretty sure you'll find at least SOME answers here!!
Sammie
thanks much for the reply....I divorced in 08....that winter started using over the counter breast enlargement pills to try and grow...not the first time...was trying a plethora of different things even while still married...should mention also....back in the early 70's attempted to "man" up and joined the Navy reserves...and at the same time I remember that I was seeing a phsyc. to get to the route of my problem with dressing in clothes....that doctor was able to get me out of the service and was discharged...but in answer to your question...I am a gay man...either that or a closeted straight woman....lol.....oh hell i don't know....haha
but the feelings become so intense sometimes that I can't even concentrate at work....
thanks much for the reply....I divorced in 08....that winter started using over the counter breast enlargement pills to try and grow...not the first time...was trying a plethora of different things even while still married...should mention also....back in the early 70's attempted to "man" up and joined the Navy reserves...and at the same time I remember that I was seeing a phsyc. to get to the route of my problem with dressing in clothes....that doctor was able to get me out of the service and was discharged...but in answer to your question...I am a gay man...either that or a closeted straight woman....lol.....oh hell i don't know....haha
but the feelings become so intense sometimes that I can't even concentrate at work....
Hey, BM, that sure makes things easier. I should throw in here that gender identity and sexual preference are not the same thing by any means, but you likely know that. At least your situation is free of entaglements to complicate things.
Over the counter breast enlargement pills are crap, and exactly the reason herbs get such a bad rap on TG boards everywhere.
The question I have is not what are you, but rather what or who do you want to be?
If you really still wish to be female it is never too late to set out on that path. If you transitioned, you would of course go from being gay man to heterosexual woman. Not unusual at all.
If you want to go that route or try it out, this is the place for advice.
Have you begun a program again? What are you taking? What are your goals?
Over the counter breast enlargement pills are crap, and exactly the reason herbs get such a bad rap on TG boards everywhere.
The question I have is not what are you, but rather what or who do you want to be?
If you really still wish to be female it is never too late to set out on that path. If you transitioned, you would of course go from being gay man to heterosexual woman. Not unusual at all.
If you want to go that route or try it out, this is the place for advice.
Have you begun a program again? What are you taking? What are your goals?
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