By way of commenting on issues arising since my last post, and since I'm not very adept at handling quotes (which have become complicated here, I'll set it out by subject, some rather OT.
Crying:
Its not just sad things, its anything that produces strong emotion, and after a lifetime of trying to hide it, change doesn't come easily. Also, I don't want to go too far the other way.
Cats:
I like cats too, especially orange cats. Our present cat, who had lived with the dog for all his eleven years, also seems to be missing him. The parrot which has been with us for more than 20 years, fairly recently learned to bark, which is now a bit spooky.
Children:
I really don't know. My wife was over 40 when we married, and we agreed that we'd just leave it to chance; it didn't happen, and I certainly had my hands full learning to cope with her two. But I feel a little guilty for not having a son, since I am the oldest son of an oldest son and so on, sis or seven generations back, and am now breaking the chain. Too many of them were clergymen or aspired to be so, so they never accumulated any wealth.
Military history:
I find it interesting too. I remember being fascinated at the age of about 16 by a two volume biography of Stonewall Jackson, presented to my father as a school prize. One of my first cousins is married to a professional military historian, and another cousin was a very versatile writer, a significant portion of whose output had military historical content. To get back very slightly on topic, one of his historical novels involved the adventures of a cross-dressed woman during the Wars of the Roses in mediaeval England.
Absentee fathers:
My father was a reservist who was called up within two weeks of my conception, which was the end of my parents normal married life. I last saw him when less than two years old - he never saw my brother at all and I have no direct memories of him. So as seems to be the case for flame and Sarah, I was brought up by my mother. I wonder how many of us this applies to, and whether it is a relevant factor?
More on parents:
My wife's mother never wanted to have children. When she got pregnant she managed to arrange a therapeutic abortion (quite a feat in the 1930s). When she got pregnant again at the age of 40, her husband stepped in and insisted that she keep it'. In due course she packed her daughter off to a snobby girl's private school which my wife-to-be hated. Her father rescued her again and she was allowed to go to the local high school, while he generally brought her up as the son he wanted and never had. He was an industrial chemist and tried to interest her in everything from chemistry to his porn collection. After university she became one of the early female entrants to the patent profession in England. She has quite a mix of male and female attitudes and an aggressiveness that I lack, so we fit pretty well together most of the time (and even though she's 15 inches shorter than I am). While I try to work around problems, she takes them head on.
GID:
This is a convenient term but I don't like that the D stands for disorder. GD (gender dysphoria) means that you are uncomfortable that your gender at least partially fails to match your physical sex. Possibly variant gender identity is a better term and yes, they all imply being to some degree transgendered.
Learning:
If I want to know about something, I'll seek information whereever and however I can. Certainly one shouldn't reinvent the wheel, but some people invent very bad wheels, and since the reliability of information sources varies wildly one needs to be able to assess these.
Posting:
By posting, one inevitably paints a picture of oneself. I'm not at all certain that I like the picture I paint of myself. I tend to edit my posts until they lack spontanaity and get a bit too serious. I envy your light touch, Sarah.
I've maundered on for far too long and my wife thinks I should be shovelling snow. Sorry.
Crying:
Its not just sad things, its anything that produces strong emotion, and after a lifetime of trying to hide it, change doesn't come easily. Also, I don't want to go too far the other way.
Cats:
I like cats too, especially orange cats. Our present cat, who had lived with the dog for all his eleven years, also seems to be missing him. The parrot which has been with us for more than 20 years, fairly recently learned to bark, which is now a bit spooky.
Children:
I really don't know. My wife was over 40 when we married, and we agreed that we'd just leave it to chance; it didn't happen, and I certainly had my hands full learning to cope with her two. But I feel a little guilty for not having a son, since I am the oldest son of an oldest son and so on, sis or seven generations back, and am now breaking the chain. Too many of them were clergymen or aspired to be so, so they never accumulated any wealth.
Military history:
I find it interesting too. I remember being fascinated at the age of about 16 by a two volume biography of Stonewall Jackson, presented to my father as a school prize. One of my first cousins is married to a professional military historian, and another cousin was a very versatile writer, a significant portion of whose output had military historical content. To get back very slightly on topic, one of his historical novels involved the adventures of a cross-dressed woman during the Wars of the Roses in mediaeval England.
Absentee fathers:
My father was a reservist who was called up within two weeks of my conception, which was the end of my parents normal married life. I last saw him when less than two years old - he never saw my brother at all and I have no direct memories of him. So as seems to be the case for flame and Sarah, I was brought up by my mother. I wonder how many of us this applies to, and whether it is a relevant factor?
More on parents:
My wife's mother never wanted to have children. When she got pregnant she managed to arrange a therapeutic abortion (quite a feat in the 1930s). When she got pregnant again at the age of 40, her husband stepped in and insisted that she keep it'. In due course she packed her daughter off to a snobby girl's private school which my wife-to-be hated. Her father rescued her again and she was allowed to go to the local high school, while he generally brought her up as the son he wanted and never had. He was an industrial chemist and tried to interest her in everything from chemistry to his porn collection. After university she became one of the early female entrants to the patent profession in England. She has quite a mix of male and female attitudes and an aggressiveness that I lack, so we fit pretty well together most of the time (and even though she's 15 inches shorter than I am). While I try to work around problems, she takes them head on.
GID:
This is a convenient term but I don't like that the D stands for disorder. GD (gender dysphoria) means that you are uncomfortable that your gender at least partially fails to match your physical sex. Possibly variant gender identity is a better term and yes, they all imply being to some degree transgendered.
Learning:
If I want to know about something, I'll seek information whereever and however I can. Certainly one shouldn't reinvent the wheel, but some people invent very bad wheels, and since the reliability of information sources varies wildly one needs to be able to assess these.
Posting:
By posting, one inevitably paints a picture of oneself. I'm not at all certain that I like the picture I paint of myself. I tend to edit my posts until they lack spontanaity and get a bit too serious. I envy your light touch, Sarah.
I've maundered on for far too long and my wife thinks I should be shovelling snow. Sorry.